Should I dump my boyfriend because he won't stop eating crisps?

[Spicyseniorita7]

I'm in a relatively new relationship (7 months) after over 2 years of being single with some dating disasters along the way. Everything seems great on paper, he is kind, has a good job that pays well, not bad looking, treats me well and never allows me to pay for anything. For context, I am 28F and he is 32M- we both live separately at present. I would like to settle down soon.

I'm unsure if I am self-sabotaging, but some of his eating/snacking habits disgust me, to the point that I think I've developed the ick. This came to light properly on our recent 2 week holiday-prior to this, the longest we had spent together was about 3 days. He eats at least 3 packets of crisps per day and not the sophisticated type i.e kettle chips, think more Skips/monster munch/Nik naks/cheesy wotsits/space raiders. He doesn't wash his hands after eating the crisps and requires prompting to do so. This often results in him having disgusting synthetic crisp dust all over his fingers and fingernails.

Even more disgustingly, after he's finished with a packet, he arches back his head and empties the remnants of the crisp crumbs into his mouth. It's almost as though he cannot bear for a single scrap to be wasted. But the most disgusting is sometimes, after finishing a packet, he will blow up the packet like a balloon and pop it. This has resulted in me being sprayed with crumbs. I've also found scrunched up crisp packets wedged behind his bed, almost as though he can't be bothered to walk to the bin.

We recently went on holiday to Spain and it was mortifying-he didn't try any local food and just wanted to eat British food, McDonald's and crisps. We went to the supermarket and he loaded up the trolley with crisps. I haven't said anything yet, he is keen to start looking for a flat to rent together, but I just can't help but thinking I would prefer a man who doesn't eat over 3 packets of crisps a day and doesn't smell like pickled onion Monster Munch or cheesy wotsits. Is eating all of those crisps a dumpable offence?

One earning all the money, paying "for me", providing "for me", and doing his own housework won't work either. At least his crisp eating isn't exploitative. OP is absolutely in the wrong here, and it's nothing to do with healthy eating or "sophisticated crisps".

I wouldn't judge anyone for either, but I would find those traits not compatible with what I was looking for in a partner. I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to be with someone whose tastes and interests align with yours.

it obviously upset(s) you enough to bring it up on here so you need to just ask yourself if you can accept this for the rest of your life. If yes then carry on with the relationship and see where it goes, if no then cut it off now. If he or his habit give you 'the ick' then maybe time to move on.

Except it's not really fair to maintain a relationship with this guy if she has reservations. If she's got the ick 7 months in then 10 years down the line the marriage is going to be a train wreck and the impact on him will be immense, he could end up 50% access to his kids. She might be willing to go ahead on that basis but he might not. People are going to have their lives ruined and they both need to make this decision with their eyes open.

Sounds like a normal person to me ! Let the bloke enjoy his crisps. I can eat exactly that wvery day as I love crisps and I too tip my head back to get the bits out. I just assumed most people did 🤣 i dont do the blow up thing but have done in the past. Might give it a go next time I have a bag

In my experience people get really weird about people who have a restrictive diet.
I genuinely don’t like food. It’s a source of huge anxiety for me and that is usually due to other people and their judgment or obsession with making me eat things I don’t want.
If people would just leave me alone I’d be fine but they don’t and they judge me harshly.
I won’t try the local food when I travel. But that doesn’t make me less of a person than someone who enjoys trying local cuisine.

I’ve been called childish, boring, uneducated, unsophisticated and I’ve even been told I must be crap in bed ( weird response tbh!). I’ve also been told I shouldn’t have children as they’ll just copy me.

The amount of judgement is just bizarre.

I think you need to try an honest conversation about the crisp habit and everything that goes with it as he probably doesnt realise it bothers you. The unwashed smelly hands, breaking the bag and not putting it in the bin are pretty off-putting and bit teenage boy behaviour! The attitude to food abroad also sounds like posturing. How much is this showing off (in a blokey way) and how much is it a sign that he is very resistant to change even to the extent of trying some different food abroad? Can you live with this or will you become increasingly irritated especially if you live together? Not a blame situation except for the crisp bags but you need that honest talk to see where you both are before the moving in happens.

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It sounds a bit shallow tbh. Especially if he had other good traits
Maybe it’s not really the crisp habit that is putting you off but something you have acknowledged?

No just no, my partner of 23 years does things that I tolerated in my 20's but gross me out now, dont settle, move on before its too late.

Apart from not washing his hands, his crisp eating habits seem totally normal to me! 😁

Jesus wept, this has to be a piss take.

They didn't even have potatoes then. They were brought to Europe in the 16th Century from South America. Chips were invented in the 19th Century and popularized in the 20th Century.
The earliest known recipe for potato chips is in the English cook William Kitchiner's book The Cook's Oracle published in 1817 in London,[2][3][4] which was a bestseller in the United Kingdom and the United States

crisps are my one true love
the sackable offence is refusing to eat ‘foreign muck’

that is a grade A no from me

I wouldn’t get angry
or judge, but travel and eating adventurous food in connection with that travel is a massive source of pleasure and happiness to me, my biggest leisure expenditure and priority
i don’t judge people who don’t like either, I would not want to be in a relationship with them because we would have little in common

Where has she said he referred to the food as ‘foreign muck’?
People are allowed to not like unfamiliar or different food. It doesn’t mean they are uncultured or offended by it.

You’re clearly quavering about this relationship, so if I were you I’d skips any more drama and walkers away as fast as I could. You can salt and shake your head at him all you like but he’ll never change. It’s a golden wonder you’ve stayed with him so long, as he’s obviously not the real mccoy’s, but I guess we all need someone to go to discos with.

16th century is 1500s, which is 500 years ago. Other root vegetables are available for chipping, too.

Print and written records in English certainly picked up in the 19th century for technological and administrative reasons. They are not evidence for first use.

A lot of accounts trace the Sephardic origins, but here is one:
www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/fish-and-chips-jewish-history-immigrants-uk-london-a9548301.html

Not eating local food abroad is worse than the crisp eating issue.

His name's not Malcolm by any chance ? 😅
'Mr Wotsit Fingers' would leave his orange fingerprints all over the electronics and keyboards at work. HR eventually had a go at him and he was forced to carry wet wipes at all times.

Exactly this. My favorite crisps are pickled onion monster Munch and Nik naks! Ha. Muh nicer than "posh" kettle chips (imo)
BUT I also can't be doing with heathens who won't try food from other countries...

This one has me stumped! I really have nothing useful I can say about this situation but, if this all upsets your equilibrium that badly, I'd say get out while you can 😉

Why?
Why are you so bothered by what someone else puts in their mouth? It doesn’t stop you eating food you like.

I travel all over the world and never eat the local food. Doesn’t make me less of a person than someone who does.

So having ARFID, an actual eating disorder, makes me a heathen? I never eat local food when I travel but that’s my issue and nobody else’s.

your issue no one else’s sums it up. OP never mentioned ARFID.

Bloody love a pickled onion monster munch
and a salt n vinegar disco

I judge nobody’s eating habits, however travel and the associated local food are massively important to me

i could not be in a relationship with someone who didn’t share that. It’s not judgment, it’s compatibility