To move north and become a childminder?

[itsme189]

Right now we live down south in a very expensive area to buy. We rent a tiny 2 bed house and with the cost of houses round here could never afford to buy even something the size of our house.

my DH works fully remotely and had been at the same company 10+ years. I work part time 3 days a week in an office. We have a 1 year old so I can’t work more due to childcare. We get by ok but can’t really afford luxuries or more than one haven holiday a year.

I have always wanted to move away for where we live and so had DH. Our parents are not in the best health (but they never are tbh) but they are fine and we have siblings who would like within 30 mins of them.

if we move to the location we are interested in we could afford (comfortably) a 3 bed house with much more space. The only issue is we use family for childcare one day a week so instead we could send her to nursery 3 days a week but I really don’t want to.

She likes nursery but is a bit of a victim if someone is getting pushed over, bitten or hit it’s her. I’ve been told it’s because once they do it she doesn’t move just freezes so she’s a bit of an easy target. It’s making me want to pull her from nursery because I scrolled through the app and she hasn’t had an incident free day in the last 9 sessions. I asked is there anything we can do to help like is she being a space invader, snatching etc. and they said no it’s just the age of the children and she’s the easiest to target as she doesn’t retaliate.

So seeing as we could afford the house up north with left over money. Would it be crazy to consider childminding? There would be space, the house is near a primary school. I have a childcare level 3 qualification. I loved childcare but nursery work etc doesn’t pay enough to live in my area so I had to change careers and become an analyst.

it would be a 5-6 hour drive away and my family and DHs would be gutted that we and their grandchild are that far away. Would it be selfish to just do it?

Sorry you had this experience! We wouldn’t be looking for new jobs we could like just on my husbands current wage and then I would be hoping to become a childminder. His job is fully remote. The place we would move to has much more going on that where we currently live. In fact where we live now it’s a 30 min drive even to a supermarket and there’s not a lot going on for kids, teenagers etc which is another reason I want to move! But deffo good points about making sure the area is right for us

If you are six hours away from your parents, does it have good transport links?

I live in a pretty out of the way place six hours from mine. Having had to do the dash down recently for the 'he's got 48 hours ' call, I was immensely glad of being on the train line.

In those circumstances I really didn't want to drive.

It's also a more relaxing way to travel with just the kids and very reasonable if booked in advance.

It's well worth considering this type of logistic when choosing where to be. But otherwise your plan sounds very sensible.

This!

Of course, there are occasions when toddlers lash out in anger/frustration but the volume of incidents you have described is far from normal. The nursery should be working on how better to support the other children to deal with their emotions/reactions. Good luck with your situation.

on another note. Its NOT your child that is the issue but the nursery staff for allowing their constantly. It is
not normal to have a child hurt every time they go to nursery, weeks on end. They need to rectify this and why so many children are hurting her and probably others. Don’t feel all nurseries are a bad place for her, finding the right one that protects her will enable her to enjoy it much more 🩷

Thank you! As a first time mum you never know what’s normal and have nothing to compare it to. But I keep pushing because at this level it cannot be normal. I will be calling the manager on Monday!

I live south of Birmingham and wish I had thought about it 30 years ago!
Honestly, go for it.
My son moved North a few years ago and we are going in two years

I would probably take the biting and pushing up with nursery if I were you. We’ve 2 DD’s, DD1 is super sensitive and has been bitten once in almost 4 years of nursery (2 different settings). DD2 is more able to look after herself but has never had incident and is 19 months, so 9 sessions all with incidents at only 2 days a week in nursery seems excessive to me tbh!

In terms of the move, why not if it’s what would suit your family! We are doing the opposite lol.

We moved and are really happy, our quality of life is better, we have a lovely home we couldn’t have afforded down south, there’s so much more to do outdoors with the children, and everyone is much friendlier!

However we don’t have any help at all with childcare, no date nights etc and when our second was born my husband missed it as he had to be with our first. So things like that can feel difficult when they’re so small, it’s just weighing it all up!

I know so many people who have moved up north lately, mainly from London. I think the pandemic gave many of them a push due to work flexibility. They are, without exception, much happier, have more money, a bigger house (swapping a flat for a family home and garden), and an overall better quality of life especially for their children. Do it!

Absolutely move for a better quality of life! Re your job, it sounds a bit extreme becoming a childminder unless you really want to - you could continue with pt office work and just find better childcare. Especially as you only have one so your home won't be too chaotic and your childcare years will pass quickly. The childminders I know are great, but work very hard (often 7.30 til 6) with little flexibility for their own holidays etc because they have to work around the needs of the families, and obviously the day is always structured around 2 school runs, come rain or shine. Would it work having your DH wfh if you have kids there?

That's shocking imo, where are the staff when this is happening? If they know she's vulnerable to being attacked by other children shouldn't they be keeping a closer eye?

Do some research into demand in that area for childminders, what the going rate is etc. It needs to be financially viable.

The north is very vague where would you be looking? I would do some research on practicalities of childminding. I looked into it while mine were younger but decided it wasn't really practical. Will your husband work from home? How will he manage with a houseful of children?

My family moved from south to north 4 years ago. A 3 bed house was sold, and a 4 bed detatched, with extensions was bought for less money, meaning they are now mortgage free. I did the same move, but I rent. It depends whereabouts in the north you are looking at. We are on the edge of a busy tourist area as well.
I would say go for it, providing the finances work for you.

There are lots of lovely places in the North of the UK and it sounds like it would be much better for you all round.

It sounds like you have already picked somewhere but have you considered trainlines? It is much quicker for me to get the train to London (as an example) than it is to drive, and much nicer! Would you be close to a suitable train to visit family that way?

I moved to Yorkshire from Essex this week. Such a beautiful large house and lots of money left over.

If I were you I’d go for it, or move your daughter.

If I were you I'd join some childminding groups on FB and enquire about how much work there is around before you decide on that being your occupation. We are seeing a massive drop in birth rates and I'm reading all across the country currently CM's are having trouble filling all of their spaces.

A reason we chose to settle in NI was housing affordability and quick 1 hour flight to parents.

Childminder here…
It’s a fantastic job, and I love it.
Things to consider…
after doing all the courses etc, it takes a LONG time to build up your business, I’ve been established 14 years, but in the beginning I worked weekends/late nights etc.
Try to find a house where it’s possible to have one room for childminding exclusively, that way you keep all the toys in there, so they are not all over your house!
You will be running your own business, with all that entails (although paperwork regarding the children is now minimal)
Although it’s a wonderful job, it can be extremely stressful, pick your parents VERY carefully (I consider the parents more than the children at interview stage)
Sign up to childcare.co.uk, in the beginning all my children came from there.
On a positive note, since the funding came in, childminding can be extremely lucrative, I earn £40 an hour, work 4 days a week, and I don’t do school pick up/drop offs.
Good luck, feel free to ask me any questions if you have them!

Hi op first off the nursery should know who is hurting your daughter it’s not about being allowed to run she shouldn’t have to. That’s a lot of injuries in a short time maybe say if it happens again you will contact ofsted. Moving sounds better all round for you all if your parents have others close by then do it because some schools are not that easy to get into and if you can buy start looking because where I live the houses are sold within a week or two at most renting is just as hard so getting a house is your priority then you can decide about your business I’m sure there always a need for childminders.

Go for it! Your parents can come and stay and will still have a lovely relationship with your daughter.

Agreed.
Don't let the wider family issues put you off. You will work out how/when to meet up with family.
It sounds like it will so much better for you.
What are you waiting for?

Good luck x

Do it . It’s the best for your family

Are you in England or Scotland if you don't mind me asking please?
Thanks.