Feeling ashamed after blacking out from alcohol

[Sunnny6]

Yesterday I went for drinks with a friend of mine in the afternoon. I got home to my family early evening and I have memory loss. I had 4 glasses of wine and I don’t drink often.

I now feel completely ashamed of myself. Worried about how I have acted and what I have said and done, both at home and whilst out. I’ve literally blacked out.

This isn’t really an AIBU but I really need some moral support. I feel like I just can’t drink. Is 4 glasses of wine excessive? They weren’t large glasses or anything.

I was going to say this exact same thing. I realised i was getting severe hangxiety as someone who doesn’t ever have anxiety of any kind. It was crippling me making me feel absolutely awful. I now hardly ever drink and on the very odd occasion that I do, I will have a maximum of 2 drinks, with a pint of water inbetween!

It sounds like you have classic beer fear to me. Alcohol induced anxiety, this won’t feel like such a big issue in a couple of days. You drank past your limit on one occasion. Put it down to experience and don’t do it again. And drink lots of water and some rehydration salts if you have them.

Yes - a husband and children. Why?

Totally subjective and it's been so hot, dehydration was probably a factor too. I had one standard vodka and tonic last and felt it immediately - didn't have another.

Are you trying to shame OP for having the audacity to drink alcohol when she has children? Presumably, they were with an adult!

Had you drunk any water? It’s boiling! It happens, just have less next time.

If you don’t often drink, 4 large glasses (1 1/3 bottles) is a lot. Especially in this heat, when the OP was likely dehydrated too.

You'll feel better tomorrow. Stock up on squash or something easy to drink and try to stop your brain being mean to itself. Any thoughts of doom try and talk to yourself as you would to a worrying friend.

How big were the glasses??!!

I would just take it as a signal not to drink more than 2 drinks in one go.

Unfortunately doing this is not always easy, with people trying to persuade you to just have one more.

It seems to be excessive for you so just stop.

Don’t see how this is relevant other than to try and make the OP shit.

Drinking in the afternoon affects me much more than Drinking in the evening and it's so hot. Try not to worry too much.

This is the beer fear talking. I get it terribly, hence I hardly drink anymore- can't deal with the anxiety.

Well remember the shame and think about it next time you’re tempted to drink too much.

Glasses of wine are large nowadays and wine is stronger. Four would be a lot if you dont drink often as you have not built up a tolerance for it. For comparison, I know someone who gets smashed of one small glass. Its not the end of the world. Learn from it and move on.

Why?

You got a bit pissed, and now you've forgotten parts of the day.

I'd say that's an experience that at least half of the adult population of the UK has had at least once or twice in their lives.

Yes, you may have said something stupid or been a bit loud and lairy, but again, not exactly an uncommon experience. And given that you were drinking with friends, they were likely too drunk to notice as well. You may even have been absolutely fine.

What you're feeling this morning is fairly common as well, it's called beer fear, alcohol makes some people anxious the next day. It'll fade.

You don't like it, so treat it as a learning experience and don't drink that much on a hot day next time.

Job done.

Most of my late teens to early 20s is one big blackout.

One of my friends told me she couldn’t remember a thing and it was so weird because she looked totally normal all night. So I’m saying you could have been acting normally just can’t remember

That happens to me with very little alcohol and that’s why I don’t drink it anymore.

I want a glass of ice cold white wine now. Suppose it's a bit too early really.

I'd love to drink 4 glasses but I've hugely reduced my drinking since being woken the next morning with a hangover at 6am by young children is no fun.

You drank a bit too much for you. It's not the crime of the century. Apologise to your host/friends and forget about it.

I don't know why you're asking if it's excessive?

Everything you've said makes it obvious that for you, it is.

Some wines have a high abv. Plus it was very hot and humid so you were probably already dehydrated. Take it easy today but in future make sure you’ve eaten and drunk plenty of water before you drink wine x

So many women think they can go on a session and drink wine all day. Wine is circa 13% vs a beer which is 4% or even spirits that you can dilute as required with a mixer. Wine is for sofa or with meal, not for extended drink. Most women who drink wine for extended periods of time end up a bit of a mess.
That said 4 glasses of wine, which would be one bottle shouldn't really have you black out unless you weigh about 45kg.

Was the friend male or female? Could the friend have been topping up your glass so you’ve had more than you thought?

Don't be ashamed. Most of us have been there. Remember other people were drinking too and probably some more drunk than they usually get. Very unlikely you did anything embarrassing and got home OK.

I do feel for you though as I have been there.

Also there's a whole weekend for everyone there to do things which will be more prominent in their minds than yesterday's event.