To refuse to move again?

[No2XW]

Name changed for this because I don’t want to be identified.

DH has two kids with his XW, 13 and 10. We have DC 4 and 1. I met him when SC were 2 and 5, we now live 1hr apart and have them EOWE, Wednesday nights and most of the school holidays.

Shortly after we met XW said she was moving a significant distance away from us to be closer to family. DH (DP then) and I agreed to move closer. She then did it again and again we moved closer (cost us 25k to move and changes of jobs). We’ve been in our current locations for 2 years and DC1 is due to start school in Sept. We are happy and settled here with good friends and some family nearby.

XW has now said she’s moving back to a previous location (it’s a four hour drive from our current location) and that SC want to move because they want to come with her.

AIBU to refuse to move again? DH is devastated.

Year 6 is absolutely a critical year as Y7 places can be really tricky to get unless it’s a bit of a crap school

Poor kids being pulled away from their friends and family

I completely agree with this

Your dh needs to get a decent solicitor and show his kids that he doesn't want them to move.

He needs to show he is willing to fight for their best interests, and them moving, again, away from their father, schools and friends, with a weeks notice is not in their best interests.

The first move was for family support, the second for a job (this is where we live now - it’s better for jobs for us too). She lost the job a while ago and this proposed move is back to near family but different family members who live further away. So it is reasonable reasons.

We’ve never lived close enough to do the school run regularly, always about an hour away, as she chooses very difficult places. She’s been quite clear that if we ever moved close enough to do the school run and tried for more custody then she’d up the parental alienation and refuse it, and we didn’t want to put the children through that. I think now they’re getting older, their eyes are opening to her selfish behaviour though.

A friend’s husband drove the school run that was over an hour away to allow his children to finish their school year.

If you are happy where you are stay put and work access around it. The older children are growing up and will be getting more independent anyway. You have done more than enough by moving twice. You deserve to be settled now.

Stay put. As you could follow her and yet again a year later she may move again
she obv has money as moving costs and stamp duty etc

sorry it will mean that dh won’t see his dc as much

def speak to a family solicitor to get proper advice