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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to think it is right she has been reported

74 replies

FedUp120028 · 17/06/2026 13:35

So,

My friend has made the assumption that I made the report, I didn't.

A mum I have come across, has come from a DV relationship, so I get her going through a tough time. This woman had her child out till very late at night and drove home under the influence of cocaine and alcohol. I ummed and arred about reporting but I don't know the little girls name, however someone has reported her and I said to my friend good bloody job because I would have reported her to the police if I was there and knew she was driving so I am glad someone did.

We have fallen out now, she has cancelled on my birthday plan assuming it was me, but AIBU to think and tell her its a good thing?

OP posts:
ThreadGuardDog · 17/06/2026 19:28

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 18:04

Can I just get this right.

A woman you know drove her car with her child in it while she was under the influence of alcohol and cocaine, yes?

And you've come here to ask

"AIBU to think and tell her its a good thing?"

I absolutely despair that you (a presumably grown woman) needs to ask this question.

And I sincerely hope you're not a driver or ever end up in charge of children.

You should NOT need to ask this for goodness sake.

Nope. OP is asking whether she’s unreasonable to be glad the woman has been reported, since her other friend thinks she was the one who reported her and thinks it’s ‘mean’.

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:29

ToKittyornottoKitty · 17/06/2026 19:21

Do you understand how discussion boards work? OPs friend has fallen out with her over this, it’s more of a discussion about it, suggesting she should never be allowed to be in charge of children or vehicles is just plain stupid. Whether she said this to her friend or not wouldn’t have changed the outcome, she would have just not been voicing her opinion on it.

She is literally asking if she's being unreasonable to think it's right that this woman was reported for drink/drug driving with her child in the car.

That is literally her question.

If she just wanted to discuss, she wouldn't have asked that.

ThreadGuardDog · 17/06/2026 19:30

Dollymylove · 17/06/2026 14:31

Im confused. Her child is grown up and doesnt live with her? So the "child" could have said no mum Im not getting in the car with you?

The child of the other friend is grown up, not the child of the woman driving.

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:30

ThreadGuardDog · 17/06/2026 19:28

Nope. OP is asking whether she’s unreasonable to be glad the woman has been reported, since her other friend thinks she was the one who reported her and thinks it’s ‘mean’.

Read the thread title...

ThreadGuardDog · 17/06/2026 19:31

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:30

Read the thread title...

Yes. Have done. And the OP. It’s not rocket science.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 17/06/2026 19:32

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:29

She is literally asking if she's being unreasonable to think it's right that this woman was reported for drink/drug driving with her child in the car.

That is literally her question.

If she just wanted to discuss, she wouldn't have asked that.

No it isn’t. She’s asking if she’s unreasonable to tell her friend what she thinks, you can further tell that from her other posts.

Zanatdy · 17/06/2026 19:34

FedUp120028 · 17/06/2026 14:09

I am quite happy to end the friendship if she thinks taking drugs around children and then driving under the influence is okay - we are obviously different people.

That’s what i’d be doing as I wouldn’t want to be friends with someone like that, as we’d be poles apart.

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:35

ThreadGuardDog · 17/06/2026 19:31

Yes. Have done. And the OP. It’s not rocket science.

And yet you still typed your previous reply 🤷‍♂️

The OP does not know whether or not she should think it was right that this woman was reported.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 17/06/2026 19:36

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:35

And yet you still typed your previous reply 🤷‍♂️

The OP does not know whether or not she should think it was right that this woman was reported.

It’s obvious that’s not what she means, you are being deliberately obtuse and have been really rude to the OP already.

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:38

ToKittyornottoKitty · 17/06/2026 19:36

It’s obvious that’s not what she means, you are being deliberately obtuse and have been really rude to the OP already.

The OP's question is in the thread title!

Dear God 🤦‍♀️

I'll leave you to your imaginary interpretation of that very simple question then.

Enjoy.

Wre · 17/06/2026 19:48

Your friend and her friend both sound like idiots. I wouldn’t be part of that.

Miyagi99 · 17/06/2026 19:48

FedUp120028 · 17/06/2026 13:39

No I am just wondering if this is why people keep their beaks out.

Beak hahaha, nice pun. Were you all together then and you didn’t report?

Honeyhonay · 17/06/2026 20:25

So your friend and another mother were at your friends house drinking and doing coke and the mother drove her child home drunk and high?
But your friend didn’t tell you to this but also she assumes it was you that made the report?
So how did you know?

FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:01

ToKittyornottoKitty · 17/06/2026 19:32

No it isn’t. She’s asking if she’s unreasonable to tell her friend what she thinks, you can further tell that from her other posts.

Yes this

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:02

Miyagi99 · 17/06/2026 19:48

Beak hahaha, nice pun. Were you all together then and you didn’t report?

I was not there, I would have called the police.

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:02

Honeyhonay · 17/06/2026 20:25

So your friend and another mother were at your friends house drinking and doing coke and the mother drove her child home drunk and high?
But your friend didn’t tell you to this but also she assumes it was you that made the report?
So how did you know?

No my friend DID tell me, that is how I know.

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:03

Besidemyselfwithworry · 17/06/2026 18:26

Safeguarding is EVERYONE’s responsibility

10000000%

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:05

SleepingStandingUp · 17/06/2026 14:15

Make your mind up. You told you friend
"good bloody job because I would have reported her to the police if I was there and knew she was driving"

So did you know or not? Did you not report because you weren't there and didn't know, would would in principle, or did you not report because you didn't know the chidks name?

I knew as of yesterday as I said I was told about it yesterday. I didn't report because the only info I have is the mothers first name.

If I was there on Saturday night - I would have called the police.

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:07

Wingedharpy · 17/06/2026 14:33

You need to reassess your social circle.

Yes, yes I do.

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:12

SwanRivers · 17/06/2026 19:29

She is literally asking if she's being unreasonable to think it's right that this woman was reported for drink/drug driving with her child in the car.

That is literally her question.

If she just wanted to discuss, she wouldn't have asked that.

No, this wasn't be asking whether it was right for her to be reported.

It is about the fact I have voiced it and fallen out with friend over it.

OP posts:
FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:15

Apologies for the poorly written op. I had a rough nights sleep, wasn't feeling great and just got a barrage of abuse from someone I thought was my friend.

OP posts:
Honeyhonay · 18/06/2026 06:18

FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 00:02

No my friend DID tell me, that is how I know.

So you and your friend were the only people who knew? Is that why she’s assuming you could be the only one who called the police?

itsme189 · 18/06/2026 06:36

Rachelshair · 17/06/2026 13:39

Your friend may be worried that you'll report her for something?

Then she shouldn’t mistreat her child and all will be fine pretty easy!

FedUp120028 · 18/06/2026 10:46

Honeyhonay · 18/06/2026 06:18

So you and your friend were the only people who knew? Is that why she’s assuming you could be the only one who called the police?

I don't know who else knew. She was gobbing off about taking cocaine in my local on Sunday so it could have been anyone!

OP posts:
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