AIBU to think my neighbour overreacted when my son's ball went astray?

[TheOpalFox]

Just got loads of abuse off a neighbour because my sons balll went into his garden!?!!!

‘ Most’ people, most rational people. Not all.

On the face of it he seems like an abusive twat who has overreacted.

On the flip side, we don't know what's going on in other people's lives. He could have any number of bad things on his plate - Illness, death of a loved one, financial struggles, MH problems. Sometimes it can be the silliest thing that is the final straw that leads to someone breaking. Having said that, the swearing is not ok.

YABNU - it’s an accident. The same people moaning about kids accidentally kicking a ball one the fence are the same who moan when kids are inside on devices.

Or, stop thinking the world revolves around you and your kids and show some basic respect towards your neighbours.

Seems to have done the trick though... so there is that.

We’ve just told our football playing neighbours to just come and retrieve their wayward balls. Not need to knock.

Footballs being kicked into gardens is REALLY annoying. The neighbour's stepson (thank God he rarely visits now) was feral, and almost kicked his ball into my new puppy's face a few years ago.

You don't know that this wasn't the final straw for this guy. You sound entitled. You're only seeing it from your viewpoint and not his - not uncommon for the "my child can use his garden to do exactly when he wants" brigade.

No wonder there are so many neighbour disputes, it must be exhausting being so intolerant.

It's not about thinking the world revolves around children. It's just not that deep. If a ball occasionally landing in your garden and you having to throw it back bothers you, you need to get a fucking grip. Sure if it's having several times a day, have a calm word with the parents, but otherwise, don't be such a miserable human.

Ofc people tell their kids not to kick balls over the fence. It just happens sometimes.

You and entitled to not have children but not live in a child free world.

My former neighbours kid (8 & NT] put them over deliberately. He would kick them over and laugh. My kids were frequently getting hit by them. I started throwing them back once a week 7/8 at a time.
His mum had the audacity to moan that she had to keep buying new balls as I was in effect stealing them, she knew what he was doing and never told him off about it.

It soon stopped when I installed cctv in our back garden and threatened legal action if my kids were hurt as a result.

It's hard to tell without having been there. On the face of it, the bloke was being unreasonable as there is really no reason to swear over one incident of a ball coming over the fence that did no damage. However, I wonder how many times the child kicked the ball into the fence before it went over. That repeated noise might give me the rage that might erupt if it finally came over.

God I have respect for my neighbours, FML. I would always tell a child to be careful, and if balls going over happened constantly, I'd remove it, but when it's a one off accident, people need to get a grip. Children are human beings. You don't have like want one, but you aren't entitled to live in a child free world and need to be tolerant.

If we spoke about any other group of people the way some people speak about children, you'd be shot down.

That's obviously quite different to a kid occasionally kicking a ball over by accident. That's just poor parenting. If kids keep doing it the ball needs confiscating, but when it's a one off, people need to get a grip.

Sure but would you hurl abuse when someone popped round to retrieve it?

I was refering to the fact some kids do it on purpose just because they are in their garden it doesn't give them right to bash against / damage neighbours fences or put a ball over.
OP is obviously going to say it was only once, we weren't there so we don't know the reality of the situation.

@ThatJadeLion I’m in no way saying it’s not annoying , we’ve had an issue ourselves when we had a free range ( during the day) rabbit and we spoke to the neighbour and she moved her goalpost . However in the case mentioned upthread she said it was the neighbours grandchildren so I really doubt it is hundreds of balls or a daily occurrence and it is nasty to put them out the front when it would be simpler to just shove them back over the fence .

He shouldn't have sworn but ball games are for parks. Not residential gardens so YABU.

Sorry, but if you don't want to deal with balls coming over your fence, go and buy a lone house in a field, live in a flat, or erect fences so high that you can see them from outer space.

And this is a dumb arsed person's very unoriginal response to having to put up with any old shit from neighbours who have kids

Yes, he might have overreacted. However, you now know the probable direction relationships will go if this becomes a regular thing. I don't think either of you will come round to the other's way of thinking you are the reasonable one.

For those saying that (generally) dogs won't be harmed or will get out of the way of a ball: I had one occasion where a shuttlecock went over a fence and our neighbours were away at the time. They didn't have a dog, but when they returned, they were looking after a puppy for a bit. The poor thing did find and chew the shuttlecock in the garden and got sick, although I believe it turned out ok, fortunately. Based on what we normally knew of each other, I had thought it was nothing to worry about but I felt very bad that, with the specifics of the time, it wasn't, and the harm could have been avoided.

100% agree. Some people are so entitled and talk such shite as a result.

When next doors boy was younger him and a few mates would play cricket in their back garden in the evening, we used to love hearing their chat. Next morning we’d have half a dozen plastic cricket balls to chuck back over the hedge. This never felt like a particularly onerous task. I honestly don’t understand some of the stuff that bothers people.

But the children are already having to wait for the balls until the nephew comes around - surely that is a deterrent by itself. It just seems so unnecessary to take deliberate steps to be difficult. She might as well throw them away!

I’m with the neighbour. I’m sick of balls coming over my fence. They destroy my plants. I don’t throw it back anymore as it’s non stop.

You honestly don't understand the fact that some people might think differently to you?

Overreaction for a first time. Should have advised Tottenham Hotspur to sign him up.