To say no to ds getting a perm?

[Jellycat1313]

Ds is 11yo and a lot of his friends have had perms.

He has said that he would like the same. I had a look into it and I read that, as I suspected, it’s not a good idea for young children due to the chemicals and it can permanently damage the hair.

He is ok about it but still saying that his friends have got it done.

Is it a bit off to say no? Most of the friends have perfectly sensible parents and they have allowed it.

Yanbu - he shouldn’t be allowed
Yabu - perms are fine for children

Why do you think he won't?

DS16 just had one, birthday present/Saturday job.
His hair had a slight wave to it already so it looks quite naturally curly and not too broccoli. I really like it.

Yes this.

I think it's unlikely to be in fashion in three years' time.

My DS is 13 and is “lucky” enough to have natural curls so has sported the llama look for a while, with no real effort. His latest request is a “modern mullet”. I’ve googled and they look frankly ridiculous, but it’s his hair and it will grow back so I will probably let him.

Wtf

Exactly🤯

I must have stumbled on an alternate universe. Where on earth are 11 year old boys (or girls for that matter) getting perms? It’s all long floppy hair here (as long as they can away with at school). Haven’t heard of perms since the 80s and they were unbearably naff then.

Could you explain what you mean by this please?

A few years ago they were all doing it, haven't seen as many recently. Personally I's let them do what they want, I know it's meant to be bad for hair, but they won't keep this that long, but it comes out of pocket/birthday money etc, beyond the normal amount you'd spend on hair.

I grew up with very conservative parents. My mother’s rule (because my dad was the provider and didn’t get involved in matters relating to the children!) was that clothes and hair aren’t forever, so as long as we weren’t coming home with tattoos and piercings, she’d keep her opinions to herself!

My son had one a couple of years ago when the trend first came back and his hair was fine. Boys get their hair cut so often it can just be cut if damaged.

Ah let him, we aren’t supposed to agree with 11 year old boys on what looks good, we’re a different generation! I did all sorts to my hair - bleach, perm, dye the lot. Didn’t think twice and it always grew out.

I have an 11 year old DD, i wouldn’t let her have a perm (or dye her hair)

I have not read anything that says having one perm is going to cause any long term or short term risks. it will look terrible but he will love it. When he is older he'll look back at it and cringe and go Oh my God mum why did you let me have that. Terrible hairstyles are a rite of passage. I tried not to say no to things just for the sake of saying no just because I didn't like it. It's hair it will grow. I tried to say yes to things unless it was risky or unhealthy, so that when I did say no he understood there was a solid reason for it. It worked for us and if I did say no , he didn't argue because he knew it wasn't my default position.

When I was younger I wasn't allowed to do anything that my friends were allowed to do and and it was not as if most of them had very liberal parents. what I did do was stop asking and did things secretly.

11 is far too young for chemical treatments. Baffled the other parents have agreed. What next? 8 year olds with highlights? Ridiculous.