To say no to ds getting a perm?

[Jellycat1313]

Ds is 11yo and a lot of his friends have had perms.

He has said that he would like the same. I had a look into it and I read that, as I suspected, it’s not a good idea for young children due to the chemicals and it can permanently damage the hair.

He is ok about it but still saying that his friends have got it done.

Is it a bit off to say no? Most of the friends have perfectly sensible parents and they have allowed it.

Yanbu - he shouldn’t be allowed
Yabu - perms are fine for children

Doesn’t matter if his hair is damaged. He can just cut it off. And grow more. It only really matters if it’s long and he wants to keep it that way

id let him, it’s fashionable right now and all the kids are doing it.

Do they not do any sort of the patch test with the chemicals? If not then I’d say no, otherwise I’d say yes, you don’t need to like his hair, and it will grow out at a decent speed at his age anyway

I’m a firm believer in letting children have bodily autonomy for things like this, a perm isn’t going to permanently damage his hair forever, it will grow out, it might look shit but who are we to judge, we used to pluck our eyebrows to think little wisps and thought we looked great. It’s so important for teenagers to feel they ‘belong’ I wouldn’t want to get in the way of that.

It's a rite of passage, make sure you get plenty of photos for future use. I'm sure everybody has done something in the past that they don't want to be reminded of 20 years later.

Who the hell even does perms now ? I would say no just from the cost perspective but I’m mean.

It's his hair, I'd let him if he really wants to. Might be more circumspect about something permanent like a piercing.

The hair salon I use will not do perms or hair colours on children under 16. These days surely hairdressers wouldn’t risk doing this? I know years ago a friend of mine had perms while we were at secondary school. I do think it’s a rite of passage when young to experiment with hairstyles. I had the Phil Oakey. Long one side and short on the other side plus lots of different hair colours. Still laugh at the photos now.

Aside from looking utterly ridiculous, would a decent salon carry out a perm on an 11 year
old? May invalidate their insurance.

My 9 year old son had one. He absolutely loved it and he looked really good! He also had the long floppy blonde hair.

He had two. Then moved on to the next style! Once it had grown out a little and then had a short cut, his hair was fine. No damage.

as long as he’s ok with having a short style after having perm or waiting for it to completely grow out ( which looks looks untidy ) then I’d say go for it.

Let him experiment and follow trends!

Id just make sure to take him to a reputable salon where they will do it properly.

I was at school in the early 90s. If you didn’t have a perm with a bone straight fringe then you didn’t have hair. At the risk of sounding all ‘it never did us any harm’, well, it never did us any harm!

I’m sure I was putting dreadful chemicals on my head at that age in some shape or form. I’m having a little lol at the broccoli hairdo tho - make sure you take lots of pics!

2000s for me. Poker straight ponytail with a side fridge, gallons of hairspray and Charlie Black. 🤢

Why would it not hold in his hair because of his age? Surely hair is hair?

What's thebig deal, its only hair

How much does it cost?

We were only permitted eyebrows with a thickness of a millimetre too. Otherwise the Brow Bobbies would be on patrol!

Before puberty it's a lot softer so often doesn't hold.

Just wanting it because some of his friends have had it is not really a good reason- say ok but you have to surrender pocket money to the value of the perm- see if he is still so keen, these things are not cheap.

Go on! The photos will be comedy gold and you’ll have leverage for life

Interesting how different this thread is to a 11 year old girl putting on make up.

They definitely didn't have perms
One perm beyond..

Interesting that you didn’t compare it to an 11 year old girl wanting to try a new hairstyle

This wouldn’t bother me, maybe say he can do it during the school holidays if you’re worried it will be a disaster.
It’s not that different to experimenting with Shaders and Toners back in the day.

Or how different it is to the one about soap. It’s almost as if people have different opinions on different things.

12 is too young to be fussing over appearance in this way. I wouldn't let my son or daughter have a perm at that age. Tell him that if he still wants a perm when he's 15 you will be happy to pay for it (he won't!).

haha!!!