To find it very annoying when people do something that inconveniences others but they find it hilarious?

[TheChewdors]

Two things lately have happened to me that have inconvenienced me a lot, but the person that has done it have found it hilarious. AIBU to be fucking annoyed that they think it's so funny?

First was a couple of weeks ago when I met up with a friend. She is quite self absorbed lately anyway but for various avoidable reasons she was late to our meet up. An hour late. Leaving me sitting in a fucking coffee shop for an hour on my own. I then was late getting home as obviously she was late and so we had to have our 'coffee and chat'. She thought it was hilarious that she was late and kept laughing about 'Oh I can't believe I was so late'. Said friend has also. had an incidence before where she ran out of petrol and I had to drive miles late and night to take her some right out on a country road and again she thought it was hilarious and kept laughing about it for weeks after.

Secondly, I bought an item on Vinted. Seller sent the wrong item and of course I've got to return it to get a refund. She has paid postage for the return but her packaging had disintegrated so I had to provide a new packaging bag and then go to the post office which is in town, queue up for ages etc to post back. So inconvenient for me. Anyway, she too thought it was hilarious that she'd sent the wrong item and her messages were full of LOL and 'oh my god it's so funny I sent the wrong item'

AIBU to be pissed off?

The first example, I would have said I needed to leave by x time and cut the chatting short.

I’ll definitely do that next time. She’s always so late and it’s things like she was doing her make up or another friend phoned her for a chat

An hour late. Leaving me sitting in a fucking coffee shop for an hour on my own.

You should have waited till she got her drink and sat down, chatted for a few minutes then said ‘oh is that the time? I have to go now!’

Then you could have joined in with her laughter, that would have been bloody funny 🤣.

I'd have left after 15 mins, not gone and driven her around and the vinted thing is just one of those annoying things that you have to deal with if you shop on vinted so I'd have kissed my teeth and sucked it up.
But that 'friend' is a 'proper character' isn't she? ie a dickhead who should be avoided

The driving around was a different time. She was out by herself one night having been on a date and ran out of petrol.

I honestly wouldn't mind the Vinted thing, we're all human and make mistakes etc etc but the fact she found it so hilarious made me annoyed.

That’s really disrespectful!! As someone else said I’d probably have waited till she got her drink then left after a few minutes! In fact I think after 15 minutes waiting for her I’d have finished my drink and left and not even waited for her to turn up!
I do have a friend who is always a little late but I now factor that in and if we’re say meeting at 6 I’ll leave my house at 6 and we both arrive at the same time but an hour late is so rude!

The first one is plain rudeness, she should have apologised sincerely and bought your coffee. It sounds like she has form for it though, so I would be rethinking the friendship.

The second one I don't really think is the same thing, they were probably just trying to keep it light. I once had someone send me odd shoes following a Vinted purchase and yes, it was a bit inconvenient to have to return one and wait for the other but it was also pretty funny. The seller and I had a virtual giggle over it and it was much nicer than if they'd just been sending me loads of messages about how sorry they were.

I hate it when people think it’s cute and funny to be late and make it part of their personality

Why on earth were you still sat there an hour later? People get 15 minutes grace from me. Later than that, they'll turn up to find I've already left.

Funnily enough, they don't tend to do it more than once.

Said friend has also. had an incidence before where she ran out of petrol and I had to drive miles late and night to take her some right out on a country road and again she thought it was hilarious and kept laughing about it for weeks after.
This sounds familiar, have you posted about her before? I think the consensus was that she wasn't your friend and you should drop her.

If she is always late then I would have left the coffee shop after I'd finished my own coffee, so 30 minutes later? But honestly, is she a good friend to you in other ways? If not then it's time to stop meeting/doing things with her.

No, I haven't posted about her before

Next time I will leave after 15 minutes. I really am getting sick of her lateness

I would have given her 20 minutes or something and then left … Oh sorry, haha that’s so funny … I thought as you hadn’t arrived after 20 minutes I got the wrong day, hahaha, whoops.
Second one … yeah, should have been more apologetic.

The Vinted thing is separate but regarding your friend you get what you settle for in terms of treatment.

She’s trained you to wait at her convenience and laugh it off.

I’d leave after 15 mins. You’ll find she magically starts being on time.

I can’t bear lateness and no way would I have waited an hour. When you wait, you enable her in thinking that this is acceptable. I’d have left after 20 mins. Or, at the very least, stared at her stony faced and said no I didn’t think it was that amusing. I know some people have a poor sense of timekeeping due to ND or whatever but I don’t care. Your ND doesn’t make it acceptable for you to waste my precious time. Find a strategy to manage it, there are loads of possibilities.
Second situation, yes very annoying but not much to be done. I hope you replied that no it wasn’t very funny and put you to a great deal of inconvenience.

You waited an hour? Fuck that! I'd have gone home.

I wouldn't be there an hour later not a chance. The vinted thing is funny but annoying. That was just a genuine mistake

Vinted - YABU. Mistakes happen. I get it’s annoying but I wouldn’t expect someone to beat themselves up over it!
Friend - definitely not unreasonable. I wouldn’t be bothering with that crap

OP you need boundaries.

Leave after 15 mins. Never wait longer than that unless the person has a geuine good reason. Or leave just as they arrive.

You get a refund because they did not deliver your item. You are not legally obliged (in UK) to return unsolicted goods. But you could say you will, as a goodwill gesture if they send prepaid P&P. You do deserve a refund.

This is my take on it: for the “friend” to find leaving you waiting an hour then laugh is her taking the piss out of you. She doesn’t give a shit. The parcel incident is a pain in the arse and not funny in the slightest because you were inconvenienced so I’d struggle to understand why the seller found it hilarious but each to their own.

I think that some people think that the laughter makes them more endearing to other people so they use it when they mess up. Doesn't work on me, I just get more annoyed when people laugh at inappropriate times.

First one is on you, as is driving to her in the night. Bin her off she's a twat.

2nd one? Meh. Shit happens

Is the laughing to cover up embarrassment maybe?

Both of those excuses would have annoyed me.

The first implies she couldn't be arsed to get ready in time, and the second makes it obvious she felt that chatting with the friend was more important than sticking to an arrangement she made with you.

No-one reasonable minds someone being late because they were stuck in roadworks or behind a tractor for miles, or because of some public transport cock-up, but I think it's really rude to be late because you couldn't be arsed to get yourself ready in time or you felt something else you were doing was more important than not keeping friends waiting.

With your "friend" you need to stop being a mug.

The second one? Meh, shit happens. It's annoying but not worth being pissed off about.