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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find it very annoying when people do something that inconveniences others but they find it hilarious?

40 replies

TheChewdors · 12/06/2026 11:50

Two things lately have happened to me that have inconvenienced me a lot, but the person that has done it have found it hilarious. AIBU to be fucking annoyed that they think it's so funny?

First was a couple of weeks ago when I met up with a friend. She is quite self absorbed lately anyway but for various avoidable reasons she was late to our meet up. An hour late. Leaving me sitting in a fucking coffee shop for an hour on my own. I then was late getting home as obviously she was late and so we had to have our 'coffee and chat'. She thought it was hilarious that she was late and kept laughing about 'Oh I can't believe I was so late'. Said friend has also. had an incidence before where she ran out of petrol and I had to drive miles late and night to take her some right out on a country road and again she thought it was hilarious and kept laughing about it for weeks after.

Secondly, I bought an item on Vinted. Seller sent the wrong item and of course I've got to return it to get a refund. She has paid postage for the return but her packaging had disintegrated so I had to provide a new packaging bag and then go to the post office which is in town, queue up for ages etc to post back. So inconvenient for me. Anyway, she too thought it was hilarious that she'd sent the wrong item and her messages were full of LOL and 'oh my god it's so funny I sent the wrong item'

AIBU to be pissed off?

OP posts:
JoshLymanSwagger · 12/06/2026 14:56

TheChewdors · 12/06/2026 12:41

Next time I will leave after 15 minutes. I really am getting sick of her lateness

No, next time add an hour.

"Oh, silly me, I can't read the time" if you bother.

Maybe also advise her to buy Greenflag or AA cover...

britnay · 12/06/2026 15:33

I take a book with me everywhere, so I would have got a coffee and read my book. If they hadn't come by the time I'd finished my coffee, I would leave.

Housewife2010 · 12/06/2026 15:39

If a "friend" kept laughing at me like that, I'd say "Gosh, you do have an unusual sense of humour" & see her reaction.

toomuchfaff · 12/06/2026 15:44

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 12/06/2026 11:52

The first example, I would have said I needed to leave by x time and cut the chatting short.

This.

Its on you for how long you stayed.

I need to leave by X time, and if she said oh no we've only just started, YES BECAUSE YOU WERE LATE....

Actions have consequences, you showed her no consequence, she will do the same next time because you absorb the impact. You were late for your n3xt thing. You shouldn't have absorbed that impact.

Pessismistic · 12/06/2026 15:44

Op she’s not exactly a great friend is she. Most decent human beings would let the person know and be very apologetic she doesn’t respect you. If you arrange again leave her sitting there for an hour then text soz I can’t make it put laughing emoji that will show her how funny she is.

outerspacepotato · 12/06/2026 15:46

Why would you wait an hour for someone? If there isn't a good reason they haven't shown up 15" after the start time, be out of there. Wasting your time is disrespectful. SEe how funny she thinks it is when she shows up an hour late and you're not there. Or any of her other bullshit. Running out of gas because she couldn't be bothered to look at her gauge and having you fetch it, do you like being her gofer and free auto club? Does she add that much to your life that it's worth her taking your time for granted and laughing about it? She thinks wasting your time and having you run after her is funny. That doesn't sound like a friendship.

The seller, unavoidable. But I wouldn't buy from her again.

ilovelamp82 · 12/06/2026 15:50

Not in a million years would I wait an hour for someone. If you know she's the late type and you want to continue the friendship, start telling her to meet an hour earlier than you plan to. Either you'll turn up at the same time or she can wait for you for a change. And you can find it hilarious.

Thelonelyshrew · 12/06/2026 15:51

ItsOnlyHobnobs · 12/06/2026 11:52

The first example, I would have said I needed to leave by x time and cut the chatting short.

I wouldn’t have waited an hour. See how hilarious she thought that was.

AgentPidge · 12/06/2026 15:54

TheChewdors · 12/06/2026 12:22

The driving around was a different time. She was out by herself one night having been on a date and ran out of petrol.

I honestly wouldn't mind the Vinted thing, we're all human and make mistakes etc etc but the fact she found it so hilarious made me annoyed.

Yes. They both sound really immature. It's only common decency to apologise for inconveniencing someone.

Pancakeflipper · 12/06/2026 15:58

Empathy with your friend thinking they are hilarious ("so crazy wacky aren't I ?") when late.

We have a friend similiar. Friends for years. We decide on a date and time. There are 3 of us (thankfully) and every bloody time "Andrea" sends us a WhatsApp message as I get the meeting place to say they booked last minute manicure/blow dry etc... and will be late.

Because there's 3 of us - the other friend and I each other to chat to. Annoys me that Andrea appears and we end up repeating conversations.

We feel our time is not valued and getting to the stage we won't bother inviting her.

Summerlovin24 · 12/06/2026 19:53

YANBU at all. I would be furious too.
So disrespectful of you and your time.
I stoped bothering with a friend.like that. If ahe pushes to make plans i will go but I don't instigate cos I end up pissed off

Vaxtable · 12/06/2026 20:07

I wouldn’t have waited an hour.

Bobcurlygirl · 12/06/2026 20:29

Yes as others say it's the first one that's the issue. Vinted well it happens. Wouldn't get a post bag just use a bin bag or something.

Its to do with boundaries, you will need to be clear. When you next meet up either say in advance "I need to get back by x time" then give her 15mins grace and leave. She will get the message that your time is as precious as hers. If she calls you to bring petrol " oh sorry I've been drinking - do you need the number of the RAC".. Good luck

Usernamenotav · 12/06/2026 21:12

Matleavehelp12 · 12/06/2026 12:32

I hate it when people think it’s cute and funny to be late and make it part of their personality

Me too! It's so common

SockPlant · 13/06/2026 11:19

Pancakeflipper · 12/06/2026 15:58

Empathy with your friend thinking they are hilarious ("so crazy wacky aren't I ?") when late.

We have a friend similiar. Friends for years. We decide on a date and time. There are 3 of us (thankfully) and every bloody time "Andrea" sends us a WhatsApp message as I get the meeting place to say they booked last minute manicure/blow dry etc... and will be late.

Because there's 3 of us - the other friend and I each other to chat to. Annoys me that Andrea appears and we end up repeating conversations.

We feel our time is not valued and getting to the stage we won't bother inviting her.

meet up, go elsewhere, when Andrea texts she's there and where are you, say "oh we had a last minute desire to go to x place" and then do it again...

Don't repeat conversations "oh, Sue and i have discussed that already. What about x, eh?" and move it on.

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