Holidays/festivals whilst on the sick

[Twinklingterapin]

A few colleagues of mine (I work in a school) have been long term sick with mental health, however they have regularly been posting their lives on social media. Ranging from mental health walks, allotment days, coffee dates with friends and even holidays abroad, all whilst off sick. Dont get me wrong i wouldnt expect people to stay inside all day or become a recluse, however I do think there should be a line. The latest has really boiled my blood, seeing posts of a colleague at Download, posing with his friends, and saying how good it is for his mental health.

Surely I cant be the only one to think this is too far? You shouldn't be able to be off on the sick from work but still go festival.

Well holidays and fun with friends do tend to help with mental health issues.

NHS staff here. Common place in nhs. These people know how to play the system. Lady in my team been off sick or on/off for 3 years. Takes the piss

Back in 2019 I had 10 weeks off with work-related stress. While i didn't do loads and didn't post about it on SM my GP did encourage me to go out as much as possible and engage in things that make me happy. If going on holiday or festivals make them happy and they do not have the time/ability/funds to go while working why shouldn't they go when they are not

Diagnosed anxiety isn't being a little bit worried about something.
It's 100mph thought patterns and chatter in your brain and once you've examined that conundrum from every angle and solved it.
Well here's another to be getting on with it can be relentless .
Oh and if you've a partner you may feel the need to vocalise this repeatedly .🤯

Do what you need to do. Anyone else can get stuffed.
Sorry about your DM

Common because the NHS fucks your mental health.

Ah.

This is why after my breakdown I was too scared to leave the house (well that and the psychosis making me believe oaps were spying on me for the government 😬) I remember being off sick and terrified to even go to the shop in case someone saw me.

After I then tried to kill myself and lost my job I basically struggled to leave the house at all for the next 6 months. I remember telling my psychiatrist of my fears of being judged. You know what she told me? "You can't hide inside forever, it's not healthy to isolate yourself. You need to try and push back against those thoughts and get out in public. You need to speak to people and see people. Starng at 4 walls will not help your depression but trying to get out and live again might " I tried to make excuses including that I couldn't afford to travel, after losing my job, her solution was making sure I applied for a disabled persons bus pass, she signed the forms to confirm I was too mentally unstable to drive, (which admittedly at the time was very true if I'd had a car back then I'd have driven myself off a cliff or into traffic quite frankly) so then I literally did not have that excuse to not leave the house.

And eventually I started venturing out. First to the local shop, then I worked my way up to the supermarket (though after 9pm when it was dead and not busy)..and yes..who k horror I also ventured out socially to spend time with friends. None of me doing any of that negated the fact that at that time I ABSOLUTELY was not well enough to be able to work.

I do work now, but ironically Im kind of back in the same situation of not leaving the house, having a life or any kind of hobbies. Simply because I have to put all of my energy into trying to stay on top on my mental illness whilst working. Id love to have a life outside of work but after I've been at work I am mentally, emotionally and physically drained and quite simply do not have the bandwidth or energy to do anything more than rest in-between work. 🙃

Tricky, especially if it’s mental health. Our organisations stance is that you are still entitled to live your life whilst unable to work. My stance as a manager is be considerate to your colleagues and carefully consider what you post online.

I think it is taking the piss

in my twenty years of teaching I have had time off sick for mental and physical health. and there is no way I would feel well enough to go to a festival if I was not well enough to go to work.

I had a horrendous miscarriage with a horrific bleed two weeks later. I felt guilty for going to look at bedroom cabinet on the day I was due to go back.

if one felt well enough to be at a festival I think one would be well enough to be at work.

If they are well enough (mental or physical) to go to a festival and still don’t feel well enough to go to work- They need to get a new job. The job is the issue not the illness.

Speaking as someone who is going through this atm, all of the above. It’s bloody murder. Self-employed so trying to keep going, but I think I’m going to have to take some time off after my current project finishes. Even if I was still salaried though and on a fit note, I wouldn’t be letting anyone tell me I couldn’t leave the house. I was signed off once with depression and the doctor specifically told me to do things that would give me a lift, including things that involved going out. I felt so much more ready to return because I’d spent time actually listening to what my body and brain needed.

Im sorry for your loss ❤️

When I'm signed of work for mental health (bipolar) and im having a manic episode you should see the crazy shit I've done it looks like I'm having the time of my life. Thankfully a lot more people are clued up on mental illness now so are less judgemental

My work wouldn't accept me into the office when I was past 20w pregnant and they don't want me in unless necessary now pre-surgery.

They don't want the liability of those more at risk! But also they genuinely don't want to create health issues in their staff by bullying them back when they should be healing.

Yep, I had a colleague/friend who had bipolar and was off with manic episodes. He was not safe to work where we did at all (kid's hospital), but he would be out having what would look like an amazing life outside of work. Total hell for his wife though.
The word at work was he was off "with stress", and that caused stigma etc too. They had no idea the real reason why.

As does work

Not when you are signed off sick from work.

Depending on the job, you could do some work. As in, if she works at a gym, teaching combat won't be possible, but she could maybe do admin work. designing displays online etc.
I'd say OP that's it's also about the employers making adjustments where possible, so people can at least do some work, in line with physical/mental needs.
But I wouldn't want people to feel they have to stay home (unless infectious) when they're off.

That is why GPs issue fit notes... they can say you can do light duties etc.
On another thread, I said about a colleague who broke his leg (we were hospital porters) and was told he could still do his job in a wheelchair 😂imagine that... a porter in a wheelchair having to push patients in wheelchairs. This place is mad sometimes. That, or work "on the phones" (no such thing).

They shouldn’t be posting and rubbing it in thee colleagues face who are covering from them
whike they’re off, they will encourage everyone to do it

Social attitudes to sickness are bonkers. Honestly, I'm the first person to admit a certain percentage of the population are deceitful little toads, and they lie and cheat everywhere they go, including in the workplace. So obviously some people claim they're sick to get paid time off work when they're not. I've encountered them for myself!

But that said, being seen outside the house isn't evidence someone is fit enough to work! Last winter I called in sick for the flu. I think I spent most of that week sleeping (it's a bit of a haze tbh), but eventually I had to go to the corner shop for more paracetamol and soup. I spent two hours gearing myself up for the walk to the shop and I had to keep pausing to sit down on people's garden walls on the way there and back. I got home, took my paracetamol, and... went back to sleep.

So yeah, I left the house. But can anyone really delude themselves that I could have made it through a 12 hour shift? I'd have been present but I would have contributed nothing to the team except germs.

I would probably have thrown up in the work toilet, sat down to recuperate after vomiting and then fallen asleep on the floor.

I'm longterm sick for some serious 'MH disorders' right now. I've taken my DC on holiday and away for the weekends - when I feel I able to leave the house and in a better place between sections and hospitalisations.

I also post these pictures on SM for several reasons. I want to be reminded that I can be happy by looking back on them, I am trying to pretend to others that I'm ok (people I don't work with don't necessarily know I'm off) - this is a trauma response. I want my DC to have access of pictures showing us happy as a family, in case my illness becomes worse and I kill myself.

There are other reasons too. None of which are of any business to the people I work with.

Who do you have to ask? Your employer? The government? What do you do if you at a single parent? A carer for a relative? Who monitors your movements? Does someone watch your house? I have so many questions about how this can possibly be.

Eh?

So she had a broken leg and they thought she was putting it on?

That’s why there shouldn’t be long term sick payment for mental health - if you are well enough to be out having a good time then you are well enough to be at work in some capacity. If it’s the job making you “unwell” then they should quit / be sacked.

There seems to be a lot of judgement here without knowing all the facts. I have a friend who works in a school currently signed off by the GP due to stress caused by the job and the pressure from the headteacher. If she hadn't been signed off I dread to think what would have happened. Whilst off she is out and about because she's not ill but work has become untenable and she needed a break. She will probably leave but she needed that time away from the stress.
I also have another friend who posted pics of her husband fishing and out at the local wildlife park whilst they are both off sick. He's off because he's got a very aggressive form of cancer and they took the kids out between his chemo and she's off because her husband has cancer and has to be in hospital for his chemo, he gets a few days out between rounds if he's well enough.
To an outsider they both probably look like they are taking the piss.
I agree some people do play the system and take the piss but we can't assume everyone is.