I hope you’re sat with a cuppa because it’s abit of a long one. My Fiancé and I have been planning our wedding for a long time. We get married in less than 2 weeks, so this happened a while ago but I’ve only just decided to discuss it as it still weighs on me. Initially, my plan was to have my best friend as my maid of honour, one of my closest friends as a bridesmaid and my SIL as a bridesmaid too. We had come out of a rough patch a few months prior, after she cut me off for not being able to attend her birthday drinks due to my car breaking and me not being able to afford it. She eventually apologised and we moved on. After asking her to be a bridesmaid she seemed happy and accepted. I reached out to the girls asking for a date we could all go dress shopping for my wedding dress as I needed input. On the day or shopping for my dress, SIL could not have looked any more miserable. I messaged her after I got home to ask if she was okay. She was annoyed because she thought she was getting her dress too that day and said she had to book time off work for it. It got smoothed over and I forgot about it. We eventually went to go and get the bridesmaid dresses, she seemed very happy on that day and it all went great. Between then and now, I’ve been having health issues, I’ve been diagnosed with ME/CFS and have been having extreme bouts of depression, but have been doing my best to function with the support of my family and friends. Back in April, my MOH asked what I’d like for my hen party. I explained I was more than happy to have a girly sleepover with some games, a takeaway and some cheesy films. I’m not one for being a party animal. My friends tried to get SIL on board with this, SIL mentioned wanting to go to a magic mike show, but that’s not something I’m interested in. So over the months leading up to the hen, my friends tried and tried to ask SIL if she was coming, she kept saying she didn’t know if she’d be at work (this was 6 months before the hen), then she was talking about not having enough money. My friends said they were happy to chip in and help her out if it meant her being there for my hen do. Eventually about 3 weeks before the hen, my bridesmaid messaged her again about it. SIL replied to say she didn’t want to come, because apparently my attitude and demeanor has been depressing lately, she didn’t want to sit in a room with a ‘mood hoover’ all night making her feel depressed, and also because she can sit and watch films at home. My bridesmaid immediately had my back and called her out on this, SIL replied to say that she’s had it hard too but she just got on with it. Obviously with my bridesmaid being a very close friend, she told me straight away. Myself and my partner phoned his mum, we explained that SIL was still more than welcome to attend the wedding, but she is no longer required as a bridesmaid and is not to contact me at all. Since then, I haven’t spoken to her, but she is point blank refusing to attend the wedding at all. I honestly don’t care, it’s my partner I feel sorry for, even though he has constantly supported me and expressed he also doesn’t care wether she attends. I’ve heard that she also thinks I’m taking advantage of my partner due to him covering bills whilst I’ve been unwell. Her reasoning for not attending the wedding continues to fluctuate between not wanting to be around my friends, and just saying she doesn’t want to go. Was i unreasonable?