AIBU to over think boyfriends ex??

[rachel55488]

Hey guys so just came here cause as usual my head over thinks everything 🤣 so basically me and partner have been together 6 months. And 2 months in he called me his ex girlfriend’s name 🤣 and I literally was so angry I messaged his ex girlfriend.. and asked her is there anything going on. And she messaged me back and was really nice and said they haven’t seen each other in about 9 months and he’s a nice guy but they just didn’t work out and there was nothing going on but she told me they had a phone call around Christmas time but there was nothing in it.. but this is when me and him started talking so I was a bit annoyed but we weren’t anything serious at this point. But then i got him to block her on Facebook and she was angry and messaged me and him and asked why she was blocked. He has since showed me that she’s still blocked etc. but my question is how did the girl notice she was blocked and why did she care so much to message him and ask why she was blocked?

Hopefully your fella will realise how controlling you are and leave you.

Sometimes i call my daughter by the cats name and vice versa

thats life

Well, you know what they say, just because you’re paranoid, it doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get you. But in this case I’d say you’re just paranoid. And controlling. And he should run, very quickly.

Is this real?

Is this real??? Tell your boyfriend to run.

I think you’re being a bit insecure.

If I were your boyfriend, I would be calling time on YOUR relationship.
You come across just a tad bit too possessive and a bit of a bunny boiler

My DH and DD used to laugh at me, because I would regularly be saying to one or other of them: "Oh, um, DH, or DD, or whoever you are...".

Even more bizarrely or funnily, I almost always got it the wrong way round. So, if I was meaning to say "DH" it would be "DD's" name which would come out first, and vice versa.

You sound at best very insecure at worst very controlling. It's a wonder your boyfriend hasn't bailed out already

Sounds like you’re looking for evidence that just isn’t there.I really think you need to work on yourself and heal before being in a relationship.I personally wouldn’t be comfortable if my partner was still friends with an ex though unless they had children together.Ex’s are the past and no reason to stay in contact.I am surprised he hasn’t ended it though.

Where is your self-esteem ? And dignity. You will drive your BF away with this crazy insecurity . If he values you and loves you and wants to be with you he won’t be interested in his ex . If he doesn’t let him sod off . You CANNOT carry on like this . It’s very bad for your stress and a very unattractive trait . If a man was acting like you he would be called controlling and no one would be on his side ! Surely you can see that anger gets you nowhere here.

Hopefully the bf has someone who can tell him about boundaries, red flags and to start running now

I once did this to my DH. We had a newborn baby and I was exhausted, older DC woke us up mega early because it was one of their birthdays. I was half asleep and I turned to him and called him my ex’s name. He was annoyed with me all day! I just didn’t mean it at all and couldn’t tell you why it even happened, only explanation is how utterly knackered I was running on virtually no sleep.

These things happen, his ex reassured you, nothing to worry about.

Nah no children with this girl! I get where people are coming from on this thread but I just find it weird how after months of breakin up they were still messagin and phone callin. I don’t think that makes me that crazy to worry about that and find that odd

If you point blank cut off an ex, then you are indicating that your choice of partner was poor. Fair enough if they behaved badly.
If you do stay in touch with an ex, then you validate the fact that you choose good and worthy people in your life even if there's no romantic or sexual chemistry.
I remain in contact with most of my exes because they are basically nice people, which is why I went for them in the first place.
I don't really subscribe to blanking all but current partner, it's a bit like ownership of a person, and it's a bit all or nothing.

We're all somewhere or other between the two attitudes and it's not really possible to expect others to change to your chosen way.

Very simply, if it was/is the case that you don’t trust him, which is what you have written here, then you just leave. Zero point staying in a relationship where you don’t trust someone and have all these sorts of thoughts. What is not okay, is staying, and acting like a nutter over it, which is what you are clearly doing. Most people have this sorted by mid teens.

I just find it weird how after months of breakin up they were still messagin and phone callin
Its called being friends... its allowed. If you arent happy with that, you need to move on. Stop trying to control him. You don't own the guy. This is particularly true for ADULT relationships that just fizzle out.

I don’t think that makes me that crazy to worry about that and find that odd
What makes you crazy is writing a new thread every week or two complaining about your perfectly reasonably partner. I cannot fathom how he puts up with it

Please stop acting like a jealous teen.

Firstly I stayed in touch with many ex boyfriends and an ex husband. Not all the time just the occasional How are you or Hsppy Christmas. I also have called my new husband by my exs name. It’s because I’m connecting the word husband with a name and the ex was there for a long long time. Hubby just laughs. If you are the girl who can’t share a boyfriend with an occasional catch up of an ex he’s not for you.

Are you in the cast of TOWIE by any chance??!!🤣
If I was your boyfriend I'd have run a mile from you by now.
Sorry, you are behaving like a possessive, insecure teenager. This sounds like 'you' problem, not a 'him/her' problem tbh.

Poor guy, you sound like a walking red flag, sounds like his ex was lovely, shame it didnt work out for them - could've saved him this drama!🙄

According to global marketer reports, the 25–34 age demographic still makes up the largest share of Facebook's 3 billion monthly users.

This sounds childish as hell and this relationship will never be solid. You need to work on your self esteem and trust issues.

Maybe they're friends. Get a grip FGS.

100% a you problem. Incredibly childish to have Facebook demand someone blocks someone online

How old are you OP? You sound very young.

I am friends with some of my ex's on Facebook and would happily catch up or message them although it happens very rarely. I am now good friends with my ex h - son's Dad and we speak on the phone and chat when he comes to see DS. We also dog sit for each other! I stayed friends with my ex from before him (from 25 years ago) although we rarely see each other now. I usually see and have a chat with his wife at Christmas when one of us drops off a card. We went to each other's weddings and I am godmother to his eldest. We babysat for each other when the kids were small. I have had no interest in getting back with any of them, never have but when you have got on well with someone, that doesn't have to stop because it didn't work out romantically.

You are massively over reacting to something very minor.