AIBU to feel guilty about collecting my child later from nursery?

[tigermoths]

I finished work at half three and went to do a supermarket shop. As a result I’m only going to be getting my three year old from nursery at gone five and I feel so guilty. This guilt stops me doing anything for me. Does anyone else experience this? And how do you stop it? If means any time I do get to myself I’m rushing around and so I don’t really enjoy it anyway.

Very silly of you.
Taking some time for yourself and minding yourself helps you be a better mother.

How can you be your best self if you don't care for yourself?

Shop in peace, then pick her up.
Mind yourself, no one else will.

There is no need to feel guilty at all op, infact perhaps you should do this more often and not to go supermarket shopping. You are a human being in your own rigjt not just mum, so long as your child is safe filling your cup up now and then is healthy.

Don’t worry op. I used to have a full day off each week while DC1 was in nursery and it saved my sanity. Now i have a half day to myself (3 hours) while DC2 is in nursery and i need it to get stuff done.

Take your toddler shopping with you. It's great social interaction, especially if they get to choose which biscuits to buy. It's also quite amusing (to me) when the child is sat in the trolley and is busy loading up with random stuff, while mum is chatting on her phone.

It can also be quite stressful! The supermarket is on the other side of town through heavy traffic, she is tired at this time and it just isn’t sensible. If I was going to a shop with her (I do sometimes) it’s in the morning.

Don't lose yourself in being MUM. If your unhappy you won't be a great mum. If all you are is a mum when they leave home you'll be lost and become one of those awful MILs who won't stop interfering.
Your child will be having a lovely time at nursery playing with her friends.

Mine are thankfully out of the nursery years but we were paying £95 a day, too fucking right I was using all my hours. You don't get a refund for picking up at 3.30 instead of 5.30.

I used to finish work at 4.30 a couple of days a week and either get loads of housework/errands done, go to the gym or have a cuppa and watch a TV show. You've got nothing to feel guilty about.

Before my eldest started school, on WFH days I used to drop them at nursery opening time (8am) and then either go to the gym or (more often) go home and have a long bath before starting work 9.30am. I miss it hugely because I can’t justify paying for breakfast club for chill out time! For some reason it felt easier than the end of the day.

I do get the guilt OP but please try to ignore the noise, it’s a hiding to nowhere and your time is important.

Can you twist the narrative on its head? Would DC prefer to be at nursery having fun or cooped up in a shopping trolley?
For the record I hate food shopping I’d much rather be at nursery!

My nearly four year old went to nursery two days last week, 9-3, over half term. I am a teacher. I had the two days to myself in the sunshine.

I don’t feel remotely guilty.

Ditch the guilt. Do something for yourself in that time - a walk, read, listen to a podcast, go get a coffee and relax; anything once it’s for you. A well rested, happy, relaxed parent is a great gift to give to your child!

Next time, go to a cafe or pub and have a drink and sit with a good book and actually enjoy your alone time.

Why would you do that?

Why feel guilty when you’ve paid for it I say. I used to go for a run before collecting mine sometimes to unwind after work.

I couldn't think of anything worse.