Wedding planner cancelled meet at wedding venue

[lilybit2025]

Our wedding planner has emailed to say she can no longer meet us at our venue next week, and while I understand the reason, I can’t help feeling a bit disappointed and frustrated.

We’re getting married in Italy in 2028, and I booked her back in October last year because securing a planner was one of the first things I wanted to get sorted. We told her then that we’d be visiting the venue in June 2026 and would love to meet her there in person, walk around the venue together, and discuss our plans.

She had previously explained that if a wedding booking ever clashed with our visit, the wedding would have to take priority, which I completely understand. However, with the venue visit now only days away, she’s let us know that one of her couples has asked her to attend an additional event before their wedding, meaning she can no longer make it.

I think what has made this harder is that I’ve already had some concerns about communication, as she can be quite slow to respond at times. I know our wedding is still two years away, but I can’t shake the feeling that because it’s not happening anytime soon, we’re being pushed further down the priority list.

I don’t expect a 2028 wedding to receive the same level of attention as a wedding taking place next week, but I do think every client should still feel valued and important, regardless of how far away their wedding date is. We booked her early because we wanted to build a relationship and feel confident that we were in good hands throughout the planning process and worried this will be the case again next year if we go to visit the venue again? She's also not asked us what our budget is or anything. I've had to tell her this is our budget etc and nothings really started happening yet. I've asked her for a list of caterers which she's sent over but she's so unprofessional in her emails and I'm just a little unsure about her. Call it a gut feeling. Do I fire her and find a new one?

It's a buyers' market and your wedding is ages away. Ditch her and find one you prefer. The whole point of paying for a wedding planner is to take the stress away of planning it yourself.

@lilybit2025 I think many posters are dismissing your concerns and scoffing at you. The point is you have booked someone for a future service (which just happens to be a wedding), someone you’ll be contracting to make lots of expensive prepaid arrangements in your behalf, and who you’ll be paying your hard-earned money too, and if you feel in your gut that she’s not meeting your expectations, you should schedule a call with her to discuss.

You’re not comfortable with her. So find someone else and let her know

She isn’t working to a budget ? She won’t come to your venue pre visit ?
What is she planning to charge you ?
Please tell me you know that ?

It doesn’t sound like they have even started properly considering it’s 2 years away.

I get it. You don’t want to cancel something 100%.

But as a business owner myself I think we do lose out on jobs because we prioritise our existing customers and can be slow to enquiries or response if someone’s project is not top of priority. That doesn’t sound great. It’s also not great for us. But we have to prioritise. And for us, when it’s time for delivery on a project that’s it - you’re getting all the focus.

Think how pissed Op would be if it was her actual wedding and the planner couldn’t show because she had to see a new client.

Edit - because the proof is really in the pudding isn’t it.

To be fair to the planner. Given the current economic climate generally who knows if the current third parties she currently uses will even be in business. Even if they are, their likely fees.

Recent Irish news - couple lost €26000 due to wedding planner going out of business in Tenerife. Wedding was meant to be in 4 months time.. are they a reputable company OP? And not just one person

Omg it’s bad enough to lose that money to an actual wedding, let alone lose it without a wedding to show for it ☹️

DH and I say we would definitely repurpose the wedding fund for a house fund if we had the chance to turn back time.

I read that story. I thought it was insane that they were spending that amount. But in particular that they were spending it on HER and not to the venue, caterers, band etc. if they had been paying directly they would have had something to show for their outlay, but because she was supposed to pass on the money but didn't, they now have absolutely nothing. It seems a mental, completely insecure way of preparing for a huge event.

Why quote the entire OP 9 replies in?

It’s not a big deal, only the first two lines of the OP appears.

This is absolute madness. 😯

No, it doesn't.

This is how it should appear. OP probably expected this.

Yup. Totally not the point of this thread but one of the reasons she is in the situation is that she refuses to date anyone under 6ft. She is my friend, but not exactly a prize (dropped out of school etc while the rest of us went on) and extreme social anxiety so won’t talk to anyone… she has ended up with all sorts of bad bad men and wouldn’t ever end a relationship because she wanted a baby 🤦‍♀️. This guy is decent and nice, and they’ll have a normal life. But she wants the ring and the huge wedding her sisters and friends had. So… waiting years. People are odd.

Just to add I know two people that got married in Italy and culturally wedding planners were a little more lax. Comms were slow and everything was very relaxed.

Didnt help no one spoke Italian or was Italian. Destination weddings are a whole other thread….