To ask how to get my young DD into acting as a child?

[LNAME]

DD has always been dramatic - she loves performing, singing, dancing and has done since she was first walking (she’s 4 now).
She attends a local dance school, but I’d really like her to do something more serious and stimulating with her interest rather than just her little class each week.

I am based in the midlands but am considering enrolling her in one of the London theatre schools for weekend classes - is something like this much more ‘serious’ vs the very casual type of lesson we attend now? Where do the young children in TV and films get selected from?

Posted in AIBU for traffic and just to hear others experiences with stage school etc.

It isn’t about where four year old actors come from. It’s about where they end up! Being dramatic isn’t the same as being a successful adult actor.

From repulsive pushy parents

let your child be a child

This

My 2 year old was on tv, you need to sign her up to an agency. Do you have Facebook ? You will get better advice on there than here

This is about you. Not your child.

Most 4 year olds are dramatic and enjoy singing dancing etc - it’s called age appropriate play - why do you want to make that enjoyable experience become ‘work’?

Search for a local acting/stage/drama group.
One of my GDs attends weekly and has blossomed with confidence. She has done some LAMDA exams and had a few singing lessons. But doesn't have the confidence in her voice to sing alone on stage. She did it once for the experience and then dropped the singing lessons. They all find their niche and she has made many friends when attending holiday camps run by the organisers.
Several of the original children who joined when it opened have now been accepted to university and during their time with the group applied to local amateur dramatic clubs for parts in local plays, musicals and operatic societies.
But be warned if you are hopeful that she will do serious stuff - then it costs money - quite a bit of money! Members are encouraged to audition for productions run by the organisers. If successful, you pay for the performance t-shirts with your childs' name on, you also pay a fee for each practise/rehearsal session, pay for costumes or hire of costumes as well the commitment to attending all sessions relating to the performances. It is a huge commitment of time and willingness for the next six months or whatever it takes to take part in the next big production. This is hard for younger children to gets to grip with and understand. If your DC shows natural ability then they will love it or it will kill it for them.

Also op - twins. The vast majority of young characters on screen are played by twins, because singletons alone simply aren't allowed to work enough hours. I'm a registered chaperone & the rules are pretty strict.

Mine started acting through PQA , it has an agency which they joined. One then met an indie producer and works for them now and again. One did some casting calls and some tv work and ditched it for illustration later.

@LNAME dd loved drama from an early age. She went to Stage Coach aged 5 (ish). Total.waste of money but she loved it and oy gave me a free Saturday afternoon.

She has a trained voice, grade 8 and more and rakes it in singing at weddings.

She did A'Level Drama and read a humanity subject at Cambridge where she got involved with footlights.

She is a qualified secondary teacher, we insisted. She will always get work. She has done RADA (expensive) l. She is going to start a speech and language therapy masters which plugs into the drama/voice.
Getting married next year and wants children.

Very gently, we are very wealthy, she's had every opportunity to follow the dream and paid acting jobs are few and far between. I really think you need to get a grip and I say that as a parent of a quite talented young person.

My 15 year old has done a bit of acting. All classes for little ones are fun, you don't teach serious acting/dance/music to 4 year olds. Stagecoach and Pauline quirke academy are both good drama schools. When your dc is older, follow your local theatre on Facebook to find out about auditions for pantomime etc. Ds was an extra in a film because they were filming in our local park and it was advertised on our local Facebook page that they needed extras.

My daughter is in the industry- well she has an agent. She’s 10, has had an agent since she was 8. She does tape after tape after tape and has had some recalls, pencils and director meets. After all this hard work, she has only done two short films. She loves it and is able to ‘tape and forget’ so never dwells on the lack of success. Soon she will hit the ‘dead zone’ and get no tapes because they will go to small young looking 16 year olds out of license. But if she wants to do it as a job as an adult, at least she knows how hard it is. I know of one 4 year old getting work and that’s it. Like others have said, most are very small 7+ year olds. It’s a good industry to be a tiny child (mine is not).

at 4, let her do local fun acting and drama classes. She’s so little. If she likes it and is doing well then look into agencies when she’s 7 or 8. There is lots of info available on Facebook to ensure you don’t apply to any scam ones. 4 is so tiny. There is no rush.

I was going to say something similar. A friend of my DD is tiny and has always looked much younger than her years. In primary school she did quite a bit of tv work playing children much younger than her actual years. She did go on to full time performing arts school and later got work playing teenage roles, but unfortunately now she looks too old for that but is too small for regular adult roles. But yes, from what we heard from her, it seems quite a lot of child roles are actually being played by someone several years older.

Good try making this seem as if your daughter wants it. Rather than you trying to live your dreams through her.

As someone who’s spent time in Film & TV, at age 4 they’re going to most likely be twins in any role other than a short cameo.

My daughter is a very good actress (awarded a scholarship at a prestigious school) and an amazing singer (has been in a West End show, sung with famous singers and on the BBC).

However, there’s no fame or glamour to it, and I absolutely put my foot down with her agent and with school as I didn’t want her academics to suffer. (She was approached for a main character role in a hugely popular West End show however it would’ve meant missing many of the first few months of senior school.)

Now she’s older we Iet her decide, she is well aware that she has to catch up school work and it’s late nights, but she is making the call on if she’s in certain shows. Exam years I won’t allow.

Why did I say all of this? Because she did nothing beyond a local dance/musical theatre school and performances at her primary school before the age of 11. And even now it’s not like it’s setting her up for a life of fame or fortune - and it’s definitely not setting us up for fortune! Quite the opposite!

She doesn’t think she wants to be a performer as her real job, her current dream is to be a vet. She just loves how singing makes her feel. I just want her to do something that she looks forward to waking up and doing every morning.

Please don’t pressure a child as young as yours into anything other than enjoying her childhood. They can only flourish when they discover things for themselves and have a true passion for it.

What sort of film and tv performing are you thinking of?

Those kids will have been found via child agencies so your dc would need to be registered with one. Most part-time theatre schools such as Stagecoach will know how to go about that, and will approach you and suggest it if your dc shows exceptional ability.

The majority of child performers will live fairly close to where the work is (eg: London agencies would prefer you to live within the M25 for instance), and to be available at very short notice. So unless you live within striking distance of a large city, the opportunities for being cast in anything would be extremely limited.

If you’re in the Midlands look into the Television Workshop when your daughter gets a bit older. That’s how Vicky McClure got into the industry.

https://www.thetelevisionworkshop.co.uk

I think 4yos on TV come from exploitative families where the parents care more about living out their own dreams vicariously through their children than they do about their children's welfare.

Your child is 4. It is far too early for them to decide that they want to do this. If you think they would enjoy it, a local theatre school is a good way to enable them to explore that interest. There will be time to pursue it seriously at a later date if they are that way inclined.

Please don't be that pushy parent. Let your child just be a child.

Tbh op I agree, plus with developments with AI the really sad and disturbing part of it all is that if you do put your child out there in TV and film its very likely their face will be used in making malicious CA content in the dark corners of the Internet. I work in safeguarding so unfortunately very aware of this and you could not pay me enough money in the world to put my child's face out there until he's old enough to make informed choices for himself.

Your dd is very little, so while yes of course as a parent you want to encourage them to believe in themselves at that age developmentally you should be focusing on building a solid range of interests and focused on relationships with others and the environment/ nature. There is plenty of time for the rest if she's talented.

I feel sad for your kid.

They come from parents who are okay with pimping out their child for money.

Talent is barely even relevant these days. There are loads of excellent actors and actresses out there who don't make it.

Some people get a break because they look exactly right.

Most get one because they have a connection/money to break their way in.

For children it's usually a cute look combined with a very calm demeanour who can follow instructions quickly and won't make a fuss/have a tantrum after sitting bored for hours waiting to be called. Emotionally resilient - can cope with being rung repeatedly for same day castings & travel in to find the jobs already gone.

My daughter was at a dance school which had an agency attached. She danced and could sing, but didn’t do any acting. Through a self tape and recall, she was given her first acting role at the age of 8. Big affair, flown abroad, high payment. But that was literally it. She then started to look too old for many acting roles and the work dried up. It’s a very tough industry OP and I don’t think I’d have ever signed her at 4 as the rejection would have been too much.

I really don't think there is much money in it unless you get a huge film contract. The theatre school classes, headshots etc probably all cost as much as a child earns. There may be some parents who are in it to bask in the reflected glory, or because they would have loved to perform and never got the chance, but there also some normal parents just supporting a child's passion.
My own DS did Stagecoach, pantomimes, child roles in local shows etc. All brilliant experiences and he learned a lot from it all. He did ask me about having an agent but I could never have made that work alongside a very demanding job. However, he chose to do performing arts in 6th form and then drama school. I would let your daughter be the guide on the level of involvement in the industry she wants. Do 2-3 more years of classes and then if she is still really keen there's no harm in approaching some agents to see if they are interested in representing her. If they do, and she has the talent, she will get tapes and castings for adverts, TV shows, stage shows etc. It will soon be clear whether she has what it takes and whether she likes doing them. If she does, great. If she doesn't, don't force her.

If you feel she will want to be an actor as an adult then it's probably better to skip involvement with the child actor recruitment process.

Stagecoach is jazz hands and does suit some kids, but once secondary school age a grounding in music and drama should be easier to fit in with the important educational stuff. Locally, both our sixth form colleges send their best productions to the Edinburgh Festival fringe. They have both been doing that since the 1970s. We are in East Anglia.

I agree with others about the money. Mine did a movie - she got £170 for 2 days (she was selected via stagecoach as they were filming in our town). It's really not much! But more importantly she had a blast playing with the other kids and that's the bit she cared about at 5 years old. She couldn't care less about the movie itself 😁