AIBU to think that even people fighting for good causes have lost their minds?

[RobynMiller]

I just keep seeing story after story of people who are morally right going way too far to make their points and actually end up hurting their cause.

Most recently a GC woman accosted an Marks and Spencers manager about their fitting rooms, filmed it and then went on to post his personal info all over twitter to incite harassment of someone just doing their job.

Looking at the comments, it's full of disgusting homophobic slurs and people calling this innocent man a nonce for simply explaining the store policy of which he has no control over.

Original tweet: https://x.com/Abouterf197543/status/2059186825143455841

If you watch the video, this poor man is working retail during this heatwave and the person filming chases him through the store. Am I unreasonable to think that this person just looks unhinged and that this kind of behavior is becoming more and more common?

It's going to be an unpopular opinion on here but I agree with you.

At the end of the day she doesnt "have to change in front of a man" as she alleges.
She can buy the clothes, try them on at home or elsewhere and return them. She can order them online. Or she can just choose to shop elsewhere if she doesnt like the changing options m&s provide.

Although I agree shops SHOULD have single sex changing facilities M&S is a business, not a charity or a public organisation - they dont have to provide changing facilities at all - lots of shops selling clothing don't - and if they do as long as they advertise their changing rooms as gender neutral they aren't breaking any laws.

The way to get a business to change their mind is to hit it where it hurts (I.e. their profits) by refusing to shop there, and/or taking the issue up with people senior enough to be able to make a change (i.e. head office as he advises). Not harassing someone at shop floor level for not risking his job by going against company policy.

What she thinks is morally right/ wrong is not the same as legal/illegal, so saying (in the comments underneath the video) that the manager himself is liable for not enforcing single sex changing is completely inaccurate.

I agree with you. Was the woman a bit dim? Did she not realise the guy was just doing his bloody job?

I hate all the bloody SM shaming.

That Twitter feed is disgusting.

USDAW, the union that represents most retail staff, have actually started a campaign about videoing retail employees today. It’s happening more frequently now and people are doing it on purpose for social media content, you have to be an idiot to kick off at staff on the shop floor who have zero say in company policies.

There are anarchists in society who will pick on any random available cause in order to use it as an excuse for their repellent behaviour.

I agree with you. In all the backlash about Scope, there were some vile comments about one of the employees just because he had worked at Stonewall previously. It really doesn’t help.

If she wanted to complain she should have contacted M & S head office. Not shame someone for doing their job.

Too many people need to see themselves as victims now, and too many people have to cause a drama about everything. 🙄

I don’t care what side of the argument people are on with this, no one who is just doing their job to the best of their ability deserves to be harassed at work, online and possibly worse. Whoever did this to this man deserves a visit from the police and needs to have a long hard look at themselves.

The internet overheats people's brains.

There are a lot of not very bright people out there who are looking for a mission in life because they feel a lack of purpose, and some of them take things too far.

Harassment is harassment regardless of who is doing it. Filming it and posting online for engagement is just awful.

I understand people feel deeply about things, I do too, but I’d never dream of treating someone just doing their job like this. It’s the same vein as the chap pushing a camera in Graham Linehan’s face until he snapped.

I agree with you, I’m remembering the thread where OP was pestering a bird charity complaining that their women’s bird walk couldn’t guarantee that it would be female only.

It was a bloody walk about birds.

Agree with you OP and first poster nailed it. That poor man. I abhor this yankified vexatious filming of innocent retail to push culture war issues. This whole Americanisation of everything is gross. If women want to protest against this, they can boycott shopping at M&S. If enough women do so and their profit line gets hurt, they might be persuaded to change their policy. But as it stands, people are still perfectly happy to shop here as their profits are increasing month on month.

That poor retailer is doing his job and enforcing store policy. She’s not “duped” into sharing a changing room with men or having her safety compromised as it is advertised as a unisex changing room. I don’t like unisex changing rooms or toilets either but why on earth would some poor young worker be at fault or authorised to change brand policy on the spot?! Really unpleasant behaviour to start a witch hunt against him on twitter.

Yep, disgusting behaviour and will impact the credibility of GC issues. I presume the woman was either unhinged or looking for her 15 minutes of social media fame. Same applies to Just Stop Oil chucking soup over a Van Gogh and Palestine protesters inciting antisemitism. Their core issues are valid, their modus operandi are alienating.

Still, if advertised as a women's walk it's a good question, there are women who just want to hang out with other women for all sorts of reasons, and checking that it will definitely be for women only is valid.
Does not matter what they were going to do on the walk, frankly.

I'd add to the negative side of the social media discussion, that it has amplified the voice of the "zealot" element way beyond that of its actual support.

I agree OP. Generally I am entirely supportive that women should have safe spaces and I am pleased with the recent SC ruling.

That said I do find it exasperating when people (usually women) focus on this one issue to the exclusion of everything else. “I’ll vote for them because at least they know what a woman is…”. Yes… the party that looks as though it would restrict women’s rights quite significantly. Perhaps it is the sane type of person that behaves in this deeply unpleasant and inappropriate manner in M& S.

It is commonplace in the modern world to video and post it online.....
Im not a fan of it and wouldn't do it but as it happens daily in the thousands i always behave in public in a way that i wouldn't be ashamed of myself if it were made public viewing.
I think this male employee of Marks and Spencer needs some additional customer service training.

1. listen carefully to customers complaints.
2. Empathise if you are unable to meet the customers needs.
3. Do not dismiss the customers concerns.
4. If you are unable to resolve the matter to the customers satisfaction explain to who they should address their complaint.
5. Do not under any circumstances ask the customer to leave because they have a complaint.

I don't understand why Marks and Spencers are not listening to many female customers and providing female single sex fitting rooms in their stores.

In what way is shitting on trans people a "good cause"?

What's your opinion about FWS who took the case to the Supreme court - did you find their focus on this issue exasperating?

I thought it was a good thing for them to challenge the situation legally. And they won. A good thing. Very different from the person who harassed the guy in M&S.

Asking, questioning etc, fine. I am with USDAW about filming of retail staff being unacceptable.

What about other women campaigning on this issue . You made a more general point about other women being focused on this issue not just the woman in M&S

M&S
would listen more if women stopped shopping in a shop that does not respect their safety and dignity

So let’s stop buying stuff from M&S