What’s the biggest life lesson you’ve learned so far this year?

[ThatQuickLimePombear]

For me, hands down: never think it can’t happen to you.

I don’t mean karma exactly, more that I genuinely never expected to experience some of the things I did this year. It’s been eye-opening, humbling, and definitely changed how I see life and people.

Curious what others’ biggest lessons have been this year, big or small.

AIBU to think some years just fundamentally change you?

I am healing. I am stronger than I used to be.

Not every mean action towards me is about me

All thanks to my time on AIBU tbh!

That some people are weapons grade arseholes. The like of which you cannot imagine.

That people who don’t do anything about keeping children safe, can actually be your family members.

That my levels of anxiety are nowhere near " normal". Other people don't crucify them selves over every word, action or behaviour. Others don't have a head full of stuff; that occasionally they have peace and a calm mind. No more deluding myself that things will eventually work out ok, without support.

That suddenly needing to care for my mum while crap, is a time that I will cherish and yearn for when she is not here anymore.

As impacting as this is on my life, there will come a time when I would give my right arm for the moments I have today, now, with her.

It's takes.omg term to get to know people well. First impressions are deceiving. Make judgements and opinions about people after some time not straightaway.

By fully immersing myself in everything that brings me happiness, whether that's walking and nature photography, reading, building Lego new sets, learning new hobbies, or accomplishing goals.

I find most people's company quite draining and greatly value my own peace, space and independence far more, so I never feel lonely. But I know I'm probably the exception to the rule with that.

My dad always calls me to drop off/pickup a particular thing he cooks that I love, but never cooks. Last week he said to me - 'enjoy, because once I'm gone you won't get it anymore '. I realised then, that'd I'd never considered his mortality, but just lived in the 'comfort' of him always being there for us 😭.

For the first time in my life, wine has started to give me suicidal ideation which is the weirdest, most disconcerting thing I've ever experienced and now I'm teetotal.

After bereavement, some people step up to support you. Others, just don't

That I don't have to do things out of duty and if it doesn't bring me joy I can just say no! I have been ill the past couple of months and so I stepped back on some volunteer responsibilities and I feel so much better for it! I am still involved but sometimes I say no instead of taking it on and wishing I hadn't said yes.

Brilliant - I loved reading this!!

Thank you so much, I really appreciate that.
it’s quite a revelation tbh.
I was told by the boss that I “really fitted in,” and this was after 2 days.
Been asked to do more work with them which I’m delighted to do.

...That I've been in an abusive relationship for almost 16 years, and I need to get out.

Yes. And you cannot fathom it until you've seen them in action.

That at nearly 60 its time to start putting myself first.

I like the phrase “weapons grade arsehole”, (if not the person it’s referring to). One of my directors referred to one of our Exec as a “thoroughbred twat” which I will definitely use again.

That my friends, neighbours and colleagues all care about me way more than my own mother and father do. I see families working together, helping each other, supporting one another, everywhere I go and it reinforces that my parents just really don’t give a shit about seeing me struggle. All they care about are their holiday plans and diet and exercise regimes.

That money doesn’t change you it just shows everyone who you really are.

This year? Hmm. One thing that’s really live for me right now is that you can’t run away from your own problem behaviour. You take it with you no matter where you live or what your job is (see username).

When your kid falls ill and it’s the kind of illness that doesn’t go away and nobody knows how to fix it, nothing else matters. It puts everything firmly back into perspective and you wonder why you ever stressed about everything else, which now seems so minor by comparison.