What’s the biggest life lesson you’ve learned so far this year?

[ThatQuickLimePombear]

For me, hands down: never think it can’t happen to you.

I don’t mean karma exactly, more that I genuinely never expected to experience some of the things I did this year. It’s been eye-opening, humbling, and definitely changed how I see life and people.

Curious what others’ biggest lessons have been this year, big or small.

AIBU to think some years just fundamentally change you?

That your life can change in an instant. In February we were discussing summer holidays. A month later I was in ITU with multiple organ failure. Currently doing dialysis 3 times a week.

Once I can accept my life may have changed permanently I'll make a better job of living.

That some amazingly useless people still manage to get by because still amazingly many people exist that are still to polite to tell them to fuck off.

My observation, year to date - age 63 and a half.

That when your dad is diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and discharged from hospital with a 6 to 12 month life expectancy, don't delay anything you want to say, not a single thing. We actually only had 3 weeks before he died. 😕

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That you can never, ever, ever win against a pathological liar in the workplace, especially when they are protected by top management.

You can have skips full of evidence, it will make no difference and you'll be the one that suffers. Your ONLY option is to get out as soon as you can.

That you can spend your life working, working, working, and in the process amass more money than most of us can dream of. Then something significant and devastating can come along out of the blue and all that money will mean fuck all.

That the key to life is often doing the things you avoid the most.

Sorry to sound like an influencer but I think there is a lot of truth in it.

I learnt how low I am on my family's priorities, bottom of the pile. Oh well, there's always wine 🍷

That some peoples expectations of what you should do for them knows no bounds. And when you push back, you never hear from them.
The silence is liberating.

How much I appreciate hot water - totally took that for granted until the boiler was condemned and we didn't have any.

If you don't ask, the answer is definitely no.

Not something I learned for the first time this year, but I was certainly reminded of it:

• Never, ever put your faith in an employer. They don’t give a fuck about you, and don’t ever think they wouldn’t drop you in a heartbeat when they need to. You are indispensable. So fuck those guys.

I used to judge those who did their employer dirty by taking extended time off for ‘mental health’ (the non-genuine cases) or took strategic annual leave, or who checked out and did no work ahead of resigning. Now I fully support such behaviour where the employer deserves it (and most big employers 100% do).

That amazing things can happen when you say yes to life and chances, get out there, don’t doubt yourself. I’ve ended up with my long lost love and I’m so very happy at last.

I’m 36 and nearly died in March after having an infection which caused my immune system to attack my spinal cord and brain. I have never been so humbled, a lot of women I met in hospital died. I was perfectly healthy before this, it really can happen to anyone x

That I am going to have to quit a job I love before my mental health is irretrievable.

I had a really horrendous 8 months post covid ( age 61) where my nervous system suddenly went nuts and caused me so many daily issues I was convinced it was curtains for me - one day it just suddenly all went away - it certainly made me realise how much we can take reasonably good health for granted - I hope it has improved for you.

Don't bother standing up for a friend,or putting yourself in a situation where you make life difficult for yourself to offer them support
Because they won't do the same in return..

To focus on the micro not the macro. The macro happens regardless.

I also read somewhere about how we are very good at looking at the past and recognising how far we have come, but really bad at thinking eg the same 5 years in the future and anticipating how much we might change/grow in that time. I’ve been trying to do that more.

That family doesn’t mean loyalty and even people who you have helped and stuck up for in the past forget all that when there’s a few quid involved.. people definitely ‘follow the money’.

Like many others have posted, life can change in a heartbeat. Don’t put things off that you want to experience, just do it.

12 weeks ago I very suddenly lost what was left of my mobility (degenerative condition) and I’m now almost housebound unless someone can’t wheel me about.

I know it’s not anyone else’s job to make me happy, but I’ve been so hurt at the lack of care from my family. Three adult dc live within ten mins of me, only one has popped in, for five mins, and actually just wanted to moan about what i can no longer do for them. I’m actually really very hurt. I thought I meant a lot to them. It’s been enlightening

Dont set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.
After a life of people pleasing Ive embraced saying no to things I don't want to do.

Friends don’t love you the way you loved them. Don’t bother again.

Had one relative pass in January and another will be gone by the end of the summer. Being in a shitty time for months now has taught me that you’ve got to find moments of joy among all the sadness. Both for myself and my children but also for the dying relative… they don’t want us crying around their bedside. They want to hear about the wonderful things we have been doing and have reassurance that life will go on without them. We will miss them and be devastated but this won’t stop us being happy people who have a strong close family.

That is should have given blood during the window of time i was able. I cant give blood now due to a blood tranfusion and feel a bit shit that I never helped someone else out.

I’ve learnt this year that you don’t have to tolerate people that are not kind to you. You can simply archive their messages and move on with your life oblivious to their nonsense. It’s been quite freeing. I’ve also learnt that you don’t need to drink wine to block out stuff - day 145 alcohol free and it’s a game changer.