AIBU here re parents and driving

[lavandermatcha]

We have a family occasion coming up soon and we’ve booked a meal afterwards at a restaurant for us, my parents and in-laws. This was all confirmed 6 weeks ago with everyone.
My parents are staying overnight as they don’t like driving back too late and they recently downsized and moved further away. They do drive occasionally and bought a new car only last year.
They've now decided in the last day they’re not driving now which now means either both me and dh have to take two cars or order and pay for a taxi for them approx £70 which we weren’t even doing for ourselves, see if in laws would take their car and take them now as originally they were planning on travelling with bil and sil. Public transport is an option but too but they would need to get one bus walk a bit then get another bus. The bus service isn’t the most reliable and is hourly.
My husband is being brilliant and offering to do two runs dropping me and dc at the restaurent then come back and get them then do it again for going home but that’s ridiculous as it will mean he will have 4 hours of driving as opposed to just 1

They should pay for their own taxi

@lavandermatcha id say “you will need to take your car so you can get the restaurant “ or it will cost YOU £70 for a taxi.

Just tell them that you won’t all fit in the one car unfortunately but you can book them a taxi if they would prefer to do that rather than take their car.

Why are you taking on the logistics?

I'm really not sure why this is your problem to sort out. If they have decided not to drive at this point then ask them what their plan is for attending the event.

I really don't see why they can make this decision and then if falls on you to stress about sorting it out or paying for it.
Maybe they can sell their one year old car and pay for a taxi?

Why isn’t getting themselves to the occasion their responsibility? Leave them to sort something out

I'd tell them they need to sort it themselves. And you need to know by X date, so you can alter the reservation.

This isn't your problem to fix op.

If they have limited vision then I am glad they are not driving.

They should have said so right from the outset though.

Agree with PPs this is very much their problem to solve. I'd worry that if your DH starts driving four hours instead of one for them it sets a precedent and they will continue to hand you their problems to fix.

ETA In your shoes I would help them but that help would be limited to giving them the details of a suitable taxi company.

So how old are they? Mumsnetters usually don't let older people drive at all

Why do you have to fix this? They’ve said they’re not driving now so they need to find an alternative themselves surely

Have they told you need to sort this out for them or have they simply said they're not driving and you've started trying to sort it out for them?

If they've asked you to drive them you say, no sorry can't, our cars full.
If they've asked you to pay a taxi you say, you can get a taxi if you don't want to drive but I'm not paying for it for you.

If they haven't asked you to sort it. You say, ok see you there!

What is your favoured option ?
If they can afford to they should travel to you somehow. Stay with you and then travel home the same way.

Do they actually have a reason why they can't drive there? If they recently bought a new car, they obviously aren't winding down on driving, planning on giving up driving or worrying that they (both?) might lose their licences for medical/age reasons.

Just deciding that you won't drive in these circumstances, and create a problem out of nowhere that somebody else than has to solve for you, is just like some of the people on the latest CF thread - who have plenty of money to go out for a meal/coffee/event, happily go and enjoy said meal/coffee/event, but then just decide that they aren't going to pay for it themselves, so somebody else will simply have to pay for them, as if they were children out with mummy and daddy.

Total non issue , you simply say to your parents that your car is full so how are they going to get to the restaurant and then leave it for them to sort out .

As they are choosing not to drive they find another way there, and if that’s a taxi at £70 then that’s what they pay

Give them the number for a local taxi company. It’s their responsibility to sort themselves out!

If they can just decide that they 'aren't driving', surely you can do the same for one of you: say that either you or DH 'aren't driving' to that event, same as they've opted not to, so you won't have two cars available and that's that.

There's nothing stopping you later changing, and 'deciding' that the one who drove there 'isn't driving' home and the one who didn't now is.

They can hardly pull you up on it when they've done exactly the same thing!

Also, 'unfortunately' you hadn't planned or budgeted for a taxi for somebody else with a car and licence, so of course you aren't in a position to pay that for them.

I second this! They are choosing not to drive.

Have you actually presented this issue to your parents, to see what their solution is?

“We initially thought you would bring your car, we do not have space in ours for all of us. Have you thought about how you might like to get around while you are here?”

"OK"

If they ask you what time you are collecting them

"Sorry can't do that. Here's a photo number for a taxi"

Not your issue to get them there .

Agree with this. They have made a problem, they can solve it.

I don’t really understand why this is impacting you particularly. It sounds like you were all making your own way to the restaurant, so why on earth does their change of plans mean you paying for the taxi?? I don’t understand how that would ever be an option?