Another baby has died in a hot car (Spain)

[comoatoupeira]

Another child has died in a horrific way after being accidentally left in a hot car.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2026/may/21/girl-dies-car-extreme-heat-spain

again, it was the father, distracted by work, who forgot to drop her off at nursery. I honesty don’t think this is a man/woman thing I think it is a work thing. In every one of this abominable stories it is someone being distracted by a work situation and they forget they haven’t dropped off the child. The article explains really well why it happens and how we need to make safeguards because we can’t rely on ourselves at all times.

distraction kills! Much more than malevolent intent.

AIBU to think that every single parent needs to read this article to realise it can happen to anyone and sometimes extreme stress and the power of habit can overcome us and cause the worst to happen
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/fatal-distraction-forgetting-a-child-in-thebackseat-of-a-car-is-a-horrifying-mistake-is-it-a-crime/2014/06/16/8ae0fe3a-f580-11e3-a3a5-42be35962a52_story.html

BE WARNED it is the most upsetting piece of writing I have ever read.

I read the WP article years ago, but couldn’t re-read it today beyond the first few paragraphs as there was a website error. Maybe that’s affecting others?

But I agree with OP, if you don’t understand how this could happen to anyone, you really need to read the article if you can. But be warned, it is harrowing.

100% I have never forgotten my kids are sat in the car with me. Even when juggling a hundred things.

Anyone that does needs serious help.

Disclaimer I've lost my glasses and car keys a few times though.

Here is a PDF of the article viewable in your browser https://mitchellhamline.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2012/01/Fatal-Distraction.pdf

Again, congrats to the perfect mothers on this thread.

Everyone swears it won’t happen to them. until it does.

But you could, that's the whole point. I'm sure the parents who this happened to also hadn't previously forgotten their children, it only takes one occasion for the tragedy to happen.

I'm probably not going to change your mind though so stay ignorant if you like.

Thank you @comoatoupeira .

Now no one has any excuse to keep saying that they don’t understand and would never do such a thing.

Far from perfect but I talked to kids in the car, or looked at them if they were asleep.

It is ridiculous to suggest it can happen to anyone if on autopilot. Do people forget their trousers, no.

Serious neglect. Tragic yes so sorry for the mother. How you'd forgive this I've no idea.

Drives me mad when you see people say 'HOW COULD ANYONE DO THAT!? Must be a terrible parent. OMG why would I put a shoe on the backseat, surely your child is more important than a shoe!? If you wouldn't forget your handbag but you'd forget your child what does that say about you!?'

Some people just lack insight and have a dangerous degree of cockiness about them that they enjoy as it makes them believe nothing like this could ever happen to them. It could. To anyone.

It's different to putting your child on a bed and they roll off. You don't have to put your child on a bed or sofa. You can put them safely on the floor. You DO have to take them to nursery, to go to work, to use a car seat in the back of the car. You'll never get through to the ones who are cocksure it is impossible for them to do. Which is a shame really as they could take steps to reduce the chance instead of pretending the chance doesn't exist and ironically their children being more at risk.

Its usually parents out of routine.

Ask about Parents who've left their baby's outside shops back in the day when it was a thing.

People get distracted forget about the baby. Out of sight, out of mind.

You looked at them whilst driving?! The whole time? Dear me!!

You cannot leave the house without trousers. You can go to work without your kid. In fact, if that's what you do every day, going to work without your kid feel entirely normal.

I hope to God this never happens to you. It could. But I hope it won't.

Important note

Please everyone do NOT think that leaving loose items in a rear seat is a good idea to remind you to check the kids. It is incredibly dangerous to put a bag into the backseat, or even a water bottle or phone.

The footwell is a bit better but the boot is the safest place for large loose items

In a collision at 30mph, due to the rapid deceleration, the effective weight of an object increases exponentially. A 1kg item can strike with a force between 30kg and 60kg depending on your stopping distance.

If you crash, items can basically go straight through the backseat and kill front-seat passenger or driver.

Haven't rtft but my thoughts are that modern cars don't seem to let you leave the windows open, even a tiny bit. I think if windows were left open a bit (as many of us used to do on hot days), forgotten babies crying would be heard by passers by.

I think it's because dogs are nuts and usually up and down and wriggly. Harder to miss than a poor child in a car seat.

You keep using examples that are people's everyday routine(well they wouldnt forget their trousers/shoes) no they wouldnt as thats part of their everyday routine. The article, which you can now read as it's been posted, explains it's about what happens when the routine changes.

Thank you for this, I've often wondered about it actually. My car is always full of junk, lots of toys on the back seat. I didn't know.

I like the idea of the car teddy that always gets put in the front when you leave the car, and in the back again before you drive off.

Fucking stupid fucking arsehole man 😡

I am not in the UK but this is what we do after 30 minutes. We have basically free childcare/schools/uni so it’s not about the money. We also call them after 15 min late picking up, in case something has happened.

Maybe it would be safer to have the child seat in the front passenger seat, not in the back of the car? Not as safe in a crash though. Alarms would just be silenced automatically so wouldn't work.

(CW-suicide)

This is an incredibly moving account by the mother of a baby accidentally left in the car by the father, who was then overcome with guilt and took his own life the same day. When the mum called asking where the baby was, he realised in horror what had happened, drove home, carried his son’s body into the house, laid him down, then went outside and took his life.

the mum’s account of the abject horror of the double loss is heartbreaking

https://www.kidsandcars.org/child-stories/anderson-and-aaron-beck

In some ways, having young children in car seats on the back seat adds to this. I'm glad it was front seats with babies when I had mine.

I left my six year old in a locked car for an hour. Luckily on my driveway.

I had the other children in the house. It wasn't until dinner time that we realised. We'd all got out and I locked the car.

Mortifying.

I think it just means the risk is now for many more months of the year so statistically it will happen more often that babies die.

Its not ridiculous. It happens. Most of my friends have admitted that at one point or another, they forgot a child was in the car.
I once forgot the dogs were in the boot. Went to the garden before going into the house and thinking where the hell are the dogs.
Luckily, it is only for a few minutes. But I can totally see how it's done.
Villifying this man is not helpful.

Yes, schools do this. Guess the only difference is children statutorily have to be at school, but agree nevertheless that it would be a good improvement if nurseries followed suit.

It’s not a man thing and it’s not an arsehole thing. It’s a tragedy. Everyone does weird stuff when distracted or out of routine. It’s just that this scenario is tragic.

my DHs DM left him in his pram outside a shop in the 1960s. She walked home suddenly realised and ran back to the shop and he was still where she left him

She wasn’t an arsehole and she wasn’t a man

This kind of thing happens all the time It’s just occasionally it’s utterly tragic