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AIBU?

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ihatethewordhubby · 19/05/2026 22:36

Ohfudgeoff · 19/05/2026 17:47

This is why it should be paid straight into a workplace pension at source, with no opt out. There's no choice then and you cut your cloth accordingly.

I think there needs to be a better education in schools and colleges around personal finances and managing finances, including pensions within that.

This is key. Educate young people on personal finance - saving, compound interest etc. My teenage daughters are very much the exception amongst their friends. They have managed their own money since age 12 - small amount each month rather than giving money as needed. Saving a small amount here and there from their part time jobs. Talking about money at home is key and helping them understand why they need to save and not spend 100% of their money

JigglingJellyBean · 19/05/2026 22:40

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 22:32

Anyway, I figure I saved the taxpayer millions, yes millions of pounds so I won't feel too guilty when I claim my state pension

You haven't saved the state millions, she was your child and your responsibility. The state and, by default, tax payers are doing you a favour.

She saved the tax payer thousands of pounds . It costs 2k plus a week to keep someone in care , even more if they have one on one carers 24/7 . Why shouldn’t she stay at home to look after her disabled daughter until she couldn’t ?. The people you should begrudge are the ones who are physically and mentally able who can work but choose not to or lie about illness and disabilities and tax dodgers and Billionaire company owners who don’t look after their staff and pay them a pittance.

PrettyPickle · 19/05/2026 22:42

Chippychoppywoo · 19/05/2026 18:05

Around 25% of working age people are not employed which would account for a large portion of this

The 25% figure is the economic inactivity rate, not the unemployment rate. It includes students, carers, long‑term sick and early retirees - not just people who are out of work. The actual unemployment rate is much lower. So saying “25% aren’t employed” is technically true but very misleading.

The actual unemployment rate is a lot lower than it was in the 80's.

XenoBitch · 19/05/2026 22:42

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 22:32

Anyway, I figure I saved the taxpayer millions, yes millions of pounds so I won't feel too guilty when I claim my state pension

You haven't saved the state millions, she was your child and your responsibility. The state and, by default, tax payers are doing you a favour.

Do you know how much carers get? It is about £85pw, and it is deducted from any UC they already get.

Would you work in a 24/7 carer job for £85pw?

Dragonflyspeeding · 19/05/2026 22:43

XenoBitch · 19/05/2026 22:34

My grandad said if he could press a button to end his life, he would have at 75 (he lived to 87).
I am not sure what work he could have done. He spent his waking hours in a chair in front his TV or at his dining table.

The sad thing is the Gov would like us all to press that button at 75. Even earlier, as soon as we stopped paying tax. Including the people paying into pensions who could have put their pension contributions into the economy instead.
Maybe we should all press it at 60 really to create employement for the young coming out of uni and imagine the savings in healthcare.
Maybe anyone under 60 should press it when their first grandchild is born so we can free up our houses and get out of the housing crisis.

Where do we stop?

Whatwerewetalkingabout · 19/05/2026 22:43

We could just cap personal wealth to £100,000,000 take the rest in tax and that would pretty much pay for everything, decent pensions, decent infrastructure and transport, universal living wage. I mean, how much more than a hundred million does an individual need to have an absolutley amazing lifestyle and have pretty much everything they could ever want for their entire family (apart from maybe the power to outright buy off governments and own media platforms) you can't earn £100,000,000 otherwise that would be the wage of paediatric brain surgeons and astrophysicists.

Billionaires should not exist in a country that is the fifth richest in the world but children need food banks to survive. Once our society is fed, housed and has a properly functioning NHS again then we can consider having billionaires.

pendatea · 19/05/2026 22:45

Lots of people are really unwell and waiting for treatment or on inadequate treatment or they could and want to work but cannot get hired. Its really difficult for able bodied healthy people to find work and work that pays well enough to pay for life and to save for retirement. Disabled people and people with health issues are in tough spot and really not to blame for not being able to save into a private pension.

PrettyPickle · 19/05/2026 22:45

Pineapplewhip · 19/05/2026 18:17

I have a friend that says "whats the point in saving; they don't let pensioners starve, its just going from one set of benefits to another"

In some ways she is right. Why should hard working people bother burying hundreds of pounds a month away, when people who dont want to sacrifice to make that saving will be taken care of.

You are woefully misinformed, have no understanding of how many pensioners have to chose between food and heating? You have a real shock coming your way. Single pensioners cannot live on £1000pm

XenoBitch · 19/05/2026 22:46

Dragonflyspeeding · 19/05/2026 22:43

The sad thing is the Gov would like us all to press that button at 75. Even earlier, as soon as we stopped paying tax. Including the people paying into pensions who could have put their pension contributions into the economy instead.
Maybe we should all press it at 60 really to create employement for the young coming out of uni and imagine the savings in healthcare.
Maybe anyone under 60 should press it when their first grandchild is born so we can free up our houses and get out of the housing crisis.

Where do we stop?

Edited

The irony here is that if my pensioner DM gave up her job (she has a cleaning company), it would actually cause about 20 younger people to lose theirs.

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 22:47

Do you know how much carers get? It is about £85pw, and it is deducted from any UC they already get

It was £60 ish a week when I was claiming it. No other benefits at all. I don't think UC existed then.

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 22:48

Maybe anyone under 60 should press it when their first grandchild is born so we can free up our houses and get out of the housing crisis

Nah. Who'd do the childcare?

Theyreeatingthedogs · 19/05/2026 22:48

frozendaisy · 19/05/2026 18:00

State pension is deducted from public pensions. Well not deducted, sort of included in their pension amount.

Huh? What do you mean by public pensions? There's no such thing. Do you mean public sector pension? State pension is completely seperate from a public sector pension, neither deducted nor included.

ticktickticktickBOOM · 19/05/2026 22:49

Healthy life expectancy in the UK is dropping and I, for one, will be making sure I have a 'do not resuscitate' statement in place as soon as I feel my quality of life is rubbish.

So I'm kind of hoping I'll be gone before the small pension I've saved runs out.

If a lot more people do the same we may not find ourselves in such a huge financial mess in a few years time after all.

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 22:50

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 22:36

You haven't saved the state millions, she was your child and your responsibility. The state and, by default, tax payers are doing you a favour

I could have accepted the placement she was offered at age 16. I didn't.
I don't deny that I would have been grateful had I not been able to cope at that time, but my decision to keep her at home did save them the money they would have spent had I accepted the place.

Did you mean to say that you were grateful to live in a society where the state was able to step in when you were no longer able to meet your child's care needs?

Devonshiregal · 19/05/2026 22:50

FernFaery · 19/05/2026 17:27

So you can’t afford to be self employed? Should you be looking for a job with a workplace pension?

youre a very silly woman. you will soon likely be unemployed, like so many other - what is it you do for work that makes you so impervious? It's always unexpected and there's always a change of tune when it happens to you. If you have managed to get this far without having to stress about paying into a pension then you should be thanking your lucky stars not sitting on your high horse judging those who are caught drowning in the current. `And no, it isnt so easy just to get a job with a pension if youre self employed. and no, you are not superior to those who havent just because you have.

Dragonflyspeeding · 19/05/2026 22:52

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 22:48

Maybe anyone under 60 should press it when their first grandchild is born so we can free up our houses and get out of the housing crisis

Nah. Who'd do the childcare?

Paid workers who pay taxes of course. Part of the merrygoround.......until they reach their fifties, have served their purpose of tax contributions. The future of the country is to be populated by under sixty year olds only apparently.

Kirbert2 · 19/05/2026 22:54

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 22:23

And because you were bringing up children, your state pension payments were credited to you - the whole time you claimed FA , your stamp was paid - by the taxpayer

One of my children has significant learning and physical disabilities and I was able to look after her at home, myself until she was 35, by which time it all got a bit too much. Her disabilities were such that she could have gone into supported living when she was 16 but I felt I would be 'letting her down' somehow.
Anyway, I figure I saved the taxpayer millions, yes millions of pounds so I won't feel too guilty when I claim my state pension.

I realise you can't have known all that, but an example of why someone might not work for years, or be able to pay into a private pension.

I'm in the same position. Though my son is 10 so younger.

I won't be able to work for many years to come.

Dragonflyspeeding · 19/05/2026 22:55

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 22:50

Did you mean to say that you were grateful to live in a society where the state was able to step in when you were no longer able to meet your child's care needs?

Do you realise that once the child became an adult, she became the state's responsibility. Do you realise the OP looked after this other adult and saved the state hundreds of thousands of pounds.

PrettyPickle · 19/05/2026 22:57

I want to share a vital life lesson I learnt too late.

I left school and went into the civil service. The wage wasn't good but at that age I did not take into account the fantastic pension I got and to me it was too far off in the future and I wanted the money NOW.

I left the civil service after 5 years for a better paying job, well I got more pay at the end of the month but what I didn't consider at the time was that in real terms I was on less as the new pension was crap. Had I stayed in the civil service I would have been looking at a decent pension now, but I'm not.

In later life I moved to the NHS, again not as good a rate as I would get in private industry but when you look at the pension, its really makes a competitive wage, but again its a deferred income and I needed the money now to cope with rising household bills.

I just wish I had decided to stay on the lower wage and play the long game. I never looked at it in this way when I was younger, When I was a teenager, youth unemployment was 20-25% as opposed to 12% now so swopping jobs was not easy but I apparently made a concerted efforted to sabotage my retirement by not considering the value of pension contributions when looking at my wage.

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 22:58

Dragonflyspeeding · 19/05/2026 22:55

Do you realise that once the child became an adult, she became the state's responsibility. Do you realise the OP looked after this other adult and saved the state hundreds of thousands of pounds.

There is a gratitude gap we are just not going to be able to agree on.

NorthXNorthWest · 19/05/2026 23:00

XenoBitch · 19/05/2026 22:42

Do you know how much carers get? It is about £85pw, and it is deducted from any UC they already get.

Would you work in a 24/7 carer job for £85pw?

Not sure what that has to do with parental responsibility or expressing gratitude for living in a society where support is available. It was not a one way street.

Franjipanl8r · 19/05/2026 23:00

I plan on working until I’m dead. Retirement sounds very boring.

XenoBitch · 19/05/2026 23:01

Franjipanl8r · 19/05/2026 23:00

I plan on working until I’m dead. Retirement sounds very boring.

So you base your whole life around work? That is sad.

BlueberryVibes · 19/05/2026 23:02

Did you mean to say that you were grateful to live in a society where the state was able to step in when you were no longer able to meet your child's care needs?

My 35 year old child? Of course I am grateful for her situation now. It doesn't alter the fact that my actions in not accepting a placement offered when she was 16 has saved a huge amount of taxpayer money that would have been spent on her care. That's just fact.

Dancingsquirrels · 19/05/2026 23:05

IkeaMeatballGravy · 19/05/2026 17:53

I think a lot of people now expect to work until they drop tbh.

For others it's just too far away to worry about when they are living hand to mouth.

Historically, I believe many people started work at 18, worked until 65, had a generous pension and died early 70s

Now, so many people expecting to study until 22, retire mid 50s and live until 80s. For the vast majority, it's unrealistic and nit sustainable

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