AIBU to ask people not to poop in new under stairs cloakroom?

[keepswimming38]

We are just having a new cloakroom installed downstairs. AIBU to put a sign up saying ‘no poo loo’ or ‘if you plan to do a poo do it in the upstairs loo’?

My DH thinks it’s not reasonable. I just down like the idea of people doing a poop in there and then the macerator having to … anyway AIBU?

Somebody at my DS's last school once infamously did a huge poo in a urinal in the boys' toilets, so they must be at least reasonably versatile!

I dont let men shit in the downstairs toilet. It's a rule in my house. They have to go upstairs. They stink, they take ages, the door is right by the hallway/kitchen/lounge and. sometimes it gets blocked because the pipe leaving it isn't very wide.

I shit it in it though.

Downstairs loos are not for number twos.
This is a hill I will die on!

Well, obviously your shit smells of violets and roses 🌹💐

I'm concerned about all these people whose shit smells so awful that a fan can't get rid.

I presume you mean visiting men and not other householders? Otherwise, how is the stink and girth of their turds so much worse than yours, if you eat the same things?

Also, we all know exactly how this would play out (and rightly so) if somebody started a thread saying "My husband monitors and restricts what standard toilet functions I'm allowed to complete in one of the toilets in our house and says that only he can fully and freely use it".

You might want to invest in a sturdy bucket for the back garden for when you get old and going upstairs may feel like climbing a mountain to you - actually buy one now, if you ever have elderly and/or disabled visitors.

I had one installed last year in my cupboard under the stairs and it's lovely! Totally impractical to have a toilet installed with mains drainage as my kitchen floor would have had to have been dug up, and I am mid-terraced, so access for plant equipment would have been a nightmare!

As long as you get a good make such as Saniflo, and you don't put unpermitted things down the toilet, such as tampons, cushioned toilet paper, bleach etc, then there shouldn't be a problem.

The privilege of having two toilets I presume?

I don’t know a single person who has more than one bathroom- I do hope you remind the poor people not to shit in it 😬

Exactly, I don't think the 'just get a proper loo installed ' brigade understand the plumbing constraints.

Our downstairs toilets hates poos and often blocks so we have a house rule - no poos downstairs but I would never ever tell a guest that, they can just poo and I’ll deal with it after. It would be so embarrassing for a guest to have to say ‘er I think I’ll use the upstairs loo’…… might as well hang a sign round their neck saying ‘I need a poo’!!

Are menstruating women allowed? What about flushing tampons? What about bowel issues where someone doesn't poop but has bad flatulence. Is that allowed? I think you'll need to be very specific in your sign.

I’m only on page 3 but this is such a funny thread. Good work everyone

This must be a sick joke. No one could be so insane as to try to control which toilet other people poo in. It’s so insensitive to people who have incontinence issues, which affects many women who have given birth. Utterly disgraceful OP.

if someone popped in for wee and a smelly fart popped out, would there be an interogation, having to prove your innocence, will there be bags provided to try and catch it, 💨 gosh problems are mounting up, what bin, inside/ outside, definitely not recycling

If someone does a big poo in the masticator toilet they can always unblock it with the "pushover plunge" that every woman carries in her handbag in case they accidentally block the toilet at a friend's house.

elQuintoConyo You’re right, everyone does! But if you’ve only got a feckin Macerator then put up a note saying ‘block the macerator and the plumbing bill will be posted to you’!
I take it your downstairs loo is on the mains. Well lucky lucky you 🤬🤬

I agree! It's not always that simple to access main drainage!

Could you maybe meet users half-way and keep a Swiss-style manual onion chopper and a butterfly net next to the cistern - so they can fish out any particularly monstrous offenders and show them who's boss before sending them on their journey through the macerator to Waterpooville, now barely any more viscous than Campbell's cream of tomato soup?

I tell you what will choke your macerator and that’s condoms. So maybe put up a sign saying ‘don’t throw your condoms down the loo’ 👍

That sounds like an old music hall ditty!

Maybe they could use the condom to contain the poo, instead of trying to flush it, and then dispose of it cleanly in the wheelie bin after they've finished the job and vacated the Saniflo salon. Happy memories of the old Kwik Save No Frills sausages.

It's a cloak room! You don't have toilets in a cloakroom, so what's even the point of this thread?

Honestly, I'd like to request that no one ever pooped in my house, ever. I don't want them showering, or shaving, or brushing their hair or teeth in any of my spaces. Might not feel that way if I wasn't the one cleaning all of the bathrooms but since I am..........!!

I get it but can you imagine being a guest in someone’s house and they say “please don’t shit in there”… The sign would also be a bit weird, what if they sit down before noticing the sign and have already started.

I do understand though, I wouldn’t want the downstairs of my home stinking and with no window in there you can’t ventilate properly.

Have you tried rodding the drains? Mine had an issue until I got the drain rods to work.

YABU to use the word "poop".