To ignore these absolutely inane text messages?

[FeliciaFancybottom]

My friend seems to have gotten into the habit of texting every thought that pops into her head and almost giving a running commentary on her life. I'll get the same messages every day: 'I've just been for a walk, I've been for lunch, it's cold here today, work is busy, I'm going to hit class'. On and on it goes, and I'm running out of things to reply with. How many times can I say "oh that's nice/good/interesting/whatever"?
I don't need this level of info about her life, and it's getting on my last nerve. I'm starting to expect her to text me that she's just had a pee!
How can I tell her that I won't be answering these kinds of messages, or do I just ignore them? I'm not massively fussed about texting; other friends get in touch maybe once or twice a week, and that's plenty for me.
I know I sound mean btw but who has the time and the interest for this!!

Do people actually need advice on how to deal with things like this?

Just mute her and be done with it

Me too! Who knew?? 😂

Please tell me where to find the codes for emojis! I use thumbs up as a friendly acknowledgement at the end of a conversation when an arrangement has been finalised!
Who gets to say it's passive aggressive??

Though in fairness most communication described on Mumsnet seems to be classed as passive aggressive, or outright aggressive, never diplomatic (heaven forfend!).

Likewise I often use TU and smiley face as appreciation .
I'm kick in bum from 60 christ I can't keep up with the dos and donts🤷

Why does someone always post this on every thread lately? It's a discussion forum; if people don't post their piddling little problems, what on earth is there going to be to discuss?

Just ignore her @FeliciaFancybottom, and maximum once a day send an emoji response to something that you actually don't mind her messaging you about. If you keep acting interested every time she messages you that she's blown her nose she'll keep sending them.

Oh lord, that's not the behaviour of a sane person.

The thumbs up emoji is not automatically PA. It depends on who is using it and in what context. For example, if I text me friend who is a lovely and sane person “still on for tonight? 8pm ok?” And she replies with 👍 I don’t think anything of it.

Another (old, don’t speak to her anymore) friend of mine would send really long ranty messages at midnight about how shit she feels and how pathetic she thinks she is etc and if your response wasn’t to her liking, she’d reply with 👍 and I’d know it was PA.

I largely ignore this type of text. I’ve had friends that have done this to me before - long lists of chores they’ve done that day or what Tesco missed out on the home food delivery. Me and my friends now largely either text to arrange to meet up, or send things that are funny/nostalgic or podcast recommendations, or restaurants I might like. Kind of “saw this and thought of you” - I like that.

A friend of DH's does this also. (To me, I mean). DH doesn;t have whatsapp so his friend texts me instead. On Saturday I got 14 messages in 5 minutes about a hobby he shares with DH then he set up a separate whatsapp group with just me in it where he shared information about a health condition we both share - that ended up with a further 9 messages in 5 minutes and 3 more this morning.

I just reply with 'I'll tell DH' or a thumbs up now once a day.

For a while I thought he was coming onto me, but actually he's bored, incredibly lonely, and texting seems his main form of communication.

I'm trying to find a way to limit it though.

Why would I make myself available to talk on the phone twice a week because that's more satisfying to her? I really am not willing to do that.
For the umpteenth time, she is not lonely; she has a very busy social life, a full-time job and loads going on.

When was the last time you actually saw her OP?

and you said that “recently” she’s ramped up the messages hugely, but when some of us have said are you not even the tiniest bit concerned - you have utterly closed the door on any such possibility. Which is… odd

For the umpteenth time, she is not lonely; she has a very busy social life, a full-time job and loads going on

that does not mean she’s not lonely. Nor does it rule out her feeling unhappy or low about something

Where did I say recently? I said she's always been an over texter. I'm not concerned because I know for a fact she would tell me if something was going on with her, because she's texts me and tells me every detail of her life.

Op when was the last time you saw her IN PERSON?

My friend seems to have gotten into the habit of texting every thought that pops into her head

does this not indicate that it is a recent development and not always been like this?

What is with you and you're almost aggressive style of posting? I've noticed it on other threads.

Yes, I read this to mean this is a fairly new behavior. How else could this be interpreted?

Does she want a conversation? Like yeah it’s so cold, freezing, meant to get better later in the week. Maybe she’s lonely

And what is it with you avoiding a very relevant question given you are 100% sure there is not a problem with your friend

and it’s quite clear that you haven’t actually seen her for ages but still absolutely certain nothing wrong

You could try replying with a ? Or delay in replying and then saying ??? Did you mean to send this to me??? Or your boyfriend?

or saying and if she doesn’t stop - send something like

Hi Jane- I’m not sure why you have sent this- great you are going to the gym are you meaning me to have constant updates on what you are doing but I really don’t need daily or hourly updates. Save them all for when we meet up and catch up x

Just stop replying back and tell her your phone isn't working properly and not receiving text messages, something to do with spam and fraud prevention, she will get the message.

My close friend does this all the time. I can’t actually cope I have said to her I find too many messages too much for my brain as i have a million WhatsApp chats with all sorts of club and school groups. She doesn’t listen last a week then get voice notes just chatting about her say 4 mins long. I have no advice but following for some myself 🤣

Why don’t you tell her you’re doing a digital detox and won’t be using sm or responding to messages?

Ugh I hate it. I would have to ignore and only answer every few hours or so. Some people should realise that not everyone is comfortable with that much socialising. I'm on the spectrum and introverted and can't stand long texting conversations with anyone. Personally, if someone I care about didn't get the hint after me not replying to every message I would tell them the truth that it's too much for me. YANBU. Even if you don't mind texting a lot, what can you even say to those boring types of texts??

Just let her messages build up then send a reply when you feel like it saying "sounds like a good day! 🙂" Quicker and easier than trying to find a way to tell her not to message you. Messages are passive things that can only intrude on you if you let them. So don't.