AIBU for struggling with my mum's dressings and the smell?

[BandageChangeRuvulsion]

Can anyone help?

My mum has lymphoma and her legs are extremely swollen and leaking lymph fluid. I care for her and have been changing her dressings/bandages for the last couple of months but I'm not sure I can keep doing it because the smell and feeling of the soaked pads is starting to genuinely revolt me. She has cellulitis ATM too so it smells really bad. The pads are literally soaked in the fluid when we change them.

Honestly without trying to sound awful the smell and feeling of it even in gloves makes me want to heave. I love my mum and know if she knew that she'd be really upset but I'm literally dreading changing her bandages in the morning.

I've tried Vicks and chewing strong gum but it doesn't help. It's like my brain knows the smell is still there. I feel like it lingers on me too and I'm paranoid that other people can smell it.

Any ideas what else I can try please? Thank you

I’m a community nurse in rural Scotland we visit patients sometimes daily in the back of the back of the beyond.
Request through your surgery a community nurse visit, GPs will admit they know nothing about dressings, they should at the very least might be able to provide you with super absorbent dressing pads, and ones that help absorb odour. But hopefully they will agree to visit daily if this is required.
Sometimes family do relatives dressing but only if they are happy too and the wound is healing and easily manageable and even then we usually stay involved visiting at least once a week. Location rarely plays a part in deciding if families can do dressings it’s not uncommon for us to drive 25 miles to a remote farm to do a daily dressing.

Just to be clear, its lymphoedema your mum has, not lymphoma which is a type of blood cancer.

She needs a lymphoedema service referral for specialist compression bandaging. This has to be done by the lymphoedema nurses in clinic, or at home by the district nurses. You won’t be able to do it.

The fact that the legs are copiously weeping fluid which is saturating the dressings means that her lymphatic system is completely overwhelmed- the only thing that can fix this is adequate compression. If she doesn’t get it, her risk of cellulitis will continue to be high (this can be fatal) and her skin is at huge risk of breaking down, causing ulcers.

Get on the phone to the GP and be firm. You simply cannot provide the care she needs, it’s completely unfair. Good luck. X

Do you mean lymphoedema? If she has leaking Lymphoedema she needs serious nursing care. Push back with the GP. Those legs sound hospital worthy. She needs a referral to the Lymphoedema service.
You can get a pump to move lymph around although you can't use them when you have an infection. They are like a bag you put your limb into. You should also look up a Manual Lymphatic Drainage practitioner. They can help advise with compression if the NhS won't (they should but it is a postcode lottery).
This is a really serious situation and if you put her in front of a practitioner who knows anything they will say hospital.

This is very poor from the GP, and inequitable care. It should not matter where you live.
Tell the GP you can no longer manage the dressings and they need to take over. This is nursing care that needs a nurse.

Like others have said get a referral to the lymphoedema nurses. Compression bandaging might be an option. Without regular specialist review there could be deterioration so regardless of how unpleasant it is you should be getting proper support. Don’t feel bad about it

Could you change her dressings outside in the summer months. Maybe leave them off for a couple of hours to let the air get to her legs?

You’re both being failed and fobbed off.

Her legs are at huge risk of ulcerating and she needs proper treatment. Push this back to the correct person - your mum’s GP and use the NICE guidelines.

Just refuse & request a district nurse to come daily to change them. They can do it, you just need to push.