To think that "97% of women can breastfeed" is a load of crap

[elliejjtiny]

I've been seeing this phrase a lot over the years, about how 97% of women can breastfeed and all the rest of the people who say they can't just need support.

I would guess that 97% of women can probably produce milk (although I wouldn't be surprised if it was lower) but there is so much more to breastfeeding than the mum producing milk which never seem to be mentioned. Mums with disabilities/medical conditions, babies with disabilities/medical conditions, babies who are born prematurely, mums separated from their babies and mums on medication that means they can't breastfeed.

When people gaily spout that 97% of women can breastfeed I find is so annoying and inaccurate. It's usually the same people who want the number of c-sections reduced as well and think that everyone can give birth with no interventions, they just need to stay mobile and ignore the nasty doctors.

And that's absolutely fine, but a lot of people do say they couldn't.

This!

Off the top of my head, I know 9 ppl who gave birth between 2024 and 2025. 7 of them claimed they couldn't BF even though they really "wanted to" but had low supply, and that's why they HAD to use formula as baby was losing weight and so they were forced to.

The same people who skipped BF at night and offered formula often so that they can get a "break" from feeding baby.

BF is so taxing on the body and it takes a lot of sacrifice from mum to maintain a good supply for baby.

An lot of people go into motherhood with the assurance that they have a backup (formula) therefore they don't try as hard to BF, and ultimately say they "couldn't", when in reality they COULD, but didn't do enough to keep it up.

So many mums will say things like they will do anything for their children / die for their children yet cannot make the sacrifice to BF their babies. IDC if I hurt feelings with this post.

I do always find it a bit surprising when people decide pre-birth not to even try to BF. Some people will flat out deny the research showing it has better outcomes.

I totally appreciate that it's not best for EVERY family and some might find that the difficulties they are having outweigh the benefits.

It is a full-time job though and if you want a successful journey you have to commit to that. I think there's an idea that maternity leave is a great opportunity to get stuff done around the house and be a SAHM for a while whilst your adorable infant sleeps peacefully in their cot, so finding that actually you're going to be spending most of your time feeding your baby through the day and night is quite a shock. As much to the Dads who come home from work and find "nothing has been done" as to the Mums. We need some real education for boys and girls on what the early days of motherhood look like and how much work actually goes into feeding a newborn.

Some of us don’t want to breast feed as there is an excellent alternative. Thankfully we have a choice and don’t have to accept criticism from other mothers.
Breast feeding doesn’t make you a better parent! It’s only one minor aspect of parenting. You can’t tell which children have and haven’t been breast fed.

I agree. I always knew I would BF mine as there is NOTHING better for the baby than what was intended for it - breast milk! Even with that mindset, I was horrified when I gave birth. My baby had tongue tie, poor latch, I was in excruciating pain for 4 weeks, I had mommy wrist for 3m and baby was latching every hr. I could barely pump as my nipples were cracked and bleeding but I pushed through and that's the dedication and sacrifice I made because I wanted to do that for my child.

So when ppl say they couldn't....... I find it hard to believe.

There definitely needs to be more education around BF in those first few weeks! I completely understand women who say they don't want to because its so so so so so hard. but to say they cant when they can, annoys me.

Not on an individual level, but on a population level, it makes a big difference.

I don't criticise, but I do find it surprising that people would choose an alternative that we know is not as good for your baby and is more expensive without even attempting breastfeeding.

Not quite - the mechanism is:

1. task requiring dopamine
2. dopamine produced
3. task completed
4. dopamine cleared away

In ADHD it’s

1. task requiring dopamine
2. dopamine produced
3. dopamine cleared away
4. more dopamine produced
5. dopamine cleared away
6. repeat until:
7. produce so much dopamine we flood the system overwhelming the clearing mechanism
8. task completed

So, people with ADHD have dopamine production switched on for longer. It’s having dopamine switched on that inhibits production of prolactin so untreated ADHD will often mean we don’t have as much chance ti produce prolactin because our dopamine production station keeps firing.

Most stimulant medications slow down the biomolecules that clear dopamine - they don’t affect dopamine production itself. This can lead, certainly in the short term, to higher levels of dopamine in the system.

This is why some women are given dopamine antagonists, inhibiting dopamine production, to help establish milk supply if they’re struggling.

I'm really not sure where you're getting this from. At best, it's a massive over-simplification of what ADHD is.

Why do you think it’s surprising that some parents make a different decision than you ? Do you think you’re a better parent than someone who makes a different decision then you?

It always bemuses me when someone's understanding is apparently so low they're surprised a person makes a different decision to them, especially for something as involved as feeding method. This goes for anyone who doesn't get things like longer term bf just as much as for anyone who doesn't get non-initiation.

You don’t have to understand another person’s decision - just accept it. Their decision is as valid as yours.

I bf my kids and it was important to me, but this is really unnecessary, and of course it is criticism. People’s individual circumstances differ hugely and decisions about feeding are not made in a vacuum. You can be fully aware of the benefits of bf and still make a different choice.

I am accepting it.

I just find it a surprising choice.

When someone says, "I tried, I hated it, I switched to formula," that makes perfect sense to me.

For all @Parker231 knows, she could have had a dream BF journey with no issues whatsoever.

It's like if someone walked into a shop and the assistant said, "This option is free and better for you on every measurable metric," and the customer said, "No, please take me to the expensive and option which is almost but not quite as good as the first one," the assistant would accept the choice, but they'd be surprised.

It's not free unless you think your time, labour and energy don't count. Obviously that's fine for you to say about your own body but not a call you are capable of making about anyone else's. I don't want you to describe mine like that.

Same with metrics- there are loads of reasons a woman might have for not wanting to initiate a feeding method that will fall totally on her possibly for the whole period (many of us don't pump well) and at least for the initial period, limits the medication she can take, means there's no option to hand the baby over to someone else for much time and means there's other things she can't simultaneously do. Naturally, there's no reason why any such woman would feel the need to make you aware of them.

This is totally premised on some random shopping assistant knowing you better than you know yourself.

Only 1% of UK mums breastfeeds exclusively to 6months. One of the lowest rates in the world. Considering the benefits for mother and child it’s really a terrible shame.

I’m not denying the rates could be higher but I’m sure that understates the true position. I don’t know that I was ever asked how long I bf my kids but I definitely weaned both at under 6 months (baby led - they were grabbing food and ready), so depending on how the question was asked I might not have been included in the stats, even though neither child had a drop of formula.

I totally agree with this.

I chose to formula fed my first and was open about this. Several women said they didn't want to bf but felt they had to 'try' because of the pressure and we're either very relieved when it didn't work out or said they couldn't.

With all the pressure to breastfeed it takes a lot of guts to admit you don't want to bf, and not all women are that confident.

The breastfeeding specialists I saw said it’s more like 60% of women physically can. A
lot of us don’t have enough breast tissue to produce enough milk due mainly to developments in food over the last 50 years - crap they inject into chickens etc - which has an effect on babies in the womb and then carries on as child is growing with what they are fed etc and modern medications and antibiotics messing up our developing bodies

I wonder if it varies by demographic?

100% of the people I know who wanted to bf could and did, and it’s not a small number of people - I’d say 50+ across the people I met at baby groups through my 2 kids, friends, family and colleagues. There were a couple of people I know who didn’t manage ebf with their first (but still combi fed) but then did for their second. The people I know who ff chose not to bf.

I live and work in an affluent area of London, mostly mothers in their 30s-40s, and bf was/is just the done thing, whereas where I’m from (in NI) hardly anyone bfs - though again I think it’s predominantly choice rather than inability to do it.

Clearly most women are that confident considering barely anyone is actually breastfeeding in the UK

Not enough breast tissue? How much is enough?
I'm an A cup and have fed 3 very fat babies 😂

Yeah, people confuse having nipples and ducts with breasts per se. But you don't need the breast tissue, there are flat chested women who do it and might produce more milk than the H cup over the road!

Are you sure you’re not thinking about initiation rates. I think this is around 97% but the significantly drops within the first 6 months

That's clearly not the case is it 😂.

It's about a third still at 6m. Not 'barely anyone'.