To wonder why people sometimes ghost good friends who did nothing wrong?

[ThatIcyLion]

I’m not talking about abuse, toxic dynamics, safety issues or situations where the friendship had clearly broken down.

I mean situations where the friend had done nothing obviously wrong, you liked them, valued the friendship, things seemed broadly fine… yet you still abruptly stopped replying, drifted away completely or effectively ghosted them.

I find it such a strange and painful thing to experience and I know quite a few people it’s happened to.

After enough time passes, I imagine reaching back out probably starts to feel awkward or loaded, which maybe makes the silence continue even longer.

But if you’ve done this, why? What was going on for you at the time? How do you feel about it now? Do you ever think about reconnecting or apologising?

I’m genuinely trying to understand rather than attacking anyone.

A proper friendship is a two way street. You want the other person to enjoy your company and feel good about themselves because they are your friend. I see all the friendship dramas in here and roll my eyes because the few friends I have (every one of whom I met after the age of 40) are trusted (a massive thing for me) and I want them to be happy,

The example I used upthread about friends getting pregnant - I wasn’t envious or angry. I just wasn’t interested. I understood the next few years was going to be a certain way for them and I had no interest in that.

No-one ghosts someone for no reason. Fact.

I agree 100%. But I’m stunned by the drama in some friendships. She said this, then someone else said that… it’s like people in their 40s and 50s have never got past the early teen stage

My dc godmother. I think I knew too much about her very religious husband’s affairs so when they moved away to start a fresh, I think I was part of wiping the slate clean. She’s not on any social media and changed her phone number. I still feel sad. I’m still friends with her dh and adult dc on Facebook and we like each other’s posts - I love seeing them grow/marry etc but ex friend isn’t on there and the connection has gone. She was the sister I never had… then she cut ties. I’m confident it was about her and not me. Sadly she’s still with her arsehole husband who makes her feel less than.

I dont 'ghost' people i just lose touch with them, no need for a modern ghost label to be stuck on it