WIBU to go nc with toxic DSis?

[Chichonian]

Dsis, DBil and their baby have announced they are coming to our City to visit and need a place to stay. My partner and I have a small 2 bed flat with open living/kitchen area. Currently we use both bedrooms each night as sleeping separately while we manage nights with our baby (who's under one).

To accomodate entitled Dsis, we have already agreed that my partner and baby will go stay with PIL to free up space in the flat. Dsis and DBil have also insisted they need both bedrooms (not sure why, but I guess that's what me and partner do so fair enough..?)

I also have DS (4) staying with me. He is a ginger BSH cat but i truly consider him part of the family. DS likes to move through the flat at night as he has a strong protective instinct, and cries at closed doors. It breaks my heart. Clearly DS needs to be shut away from baby in the crib in bedroom 1, but I see no reason why he shouldn't have free reign into bedroom 2 while I am upstairs on the sofa. He does tend to beg for food after about 5am (foot nibbling etc.) but thats his prerogative and all totally managable.

Toxic Dsis is insisting now that DS be shut out of both bedrooms at night, and I will be left managing heartbroken, screaming baby boy 😪. This feels like the last straw to me, WIBU to cancel the visit and finally go NC?

Just tell them to get an AirBnB.

Less dramatic.

Why are you allowing someone to come and take over your home? Tell her to piss off.

Just tell them they can't stay with you. End of story.

I agree that you shouldn’t let Dsis and family take over your home but, although I love animals, I think YABU referring to DCat as DS!

Your cat is your son?

Anyway why on earth your partner would move out to accommodate visitors is beyond me

Not to drip feed but worth adding that reason they are coming down is because it is their Niece's christening so important occasion 🙀

They can still go to an AirBnB.

Don't let them roll over you. Just put your foot down.

I'd really ask why you are apparently more prepared to go NC than tell them to stay somewhere else.

I would let DS decide, cats rule.

I'm just conflict averse I guess so easier to ghost (although maybe not as they on the Eurostar as we speak...)

Dsis and DBil have also insisted they need both bedrooms (not sure why, but I guess that's what me and partner do so fair enough..?)

What? They can't just kick you out of your whole house!

On the surface of it they do sound unreasonable. However, it sounds like you agreed to all of this. You’re clearly very conflict averse so maybe you sounded more amenable than you meant to? I can see why, when travelling abroad with a baby, it would be stressful to discover you’re going to be disturbed by what sounds like a fairly high maintenance cat.

I understand that. I spent years putting people up at our house because of - whatever reason.

Menopause has been bloody brilliant for me. I genuinely don't GAF anymore and a couple of years ago after one brutal summer (we are in a tourist area) I put all the spare beds into the skip and turned out spare room into a dressing room for me and a mini library.

So, i do sympathise. But i still think you ought to tell them to go get an AirBnb.

I had a very similar experience where family offered us a place to stay and told us not to get an Airbnb, even though we said we’d need both bedrooms. They then insisted we needed to room share with their poodle and were being ungrateful for questioning this! At this point it was too late to source alternative accommodation.

His sorry dsis but your requests don't work for us... Here is a link to Airbnb near us.
You have a dc ffs. Woman up and use your words.

It doesn't matter what reason they are near you, just tell them an air BnB is better for everyone then that's the procedure they'll follow going forward. This is not being conflict averse, it's being an adult. They can only bully their way in if you let them. Absolutely crazy for you to be allowing it rather than saying NO

Hang on a minute, you're going to send your partner and your actual human baby to stay somewhere else so that you can focus on your cat? And give up both bedrooms to your SIL and BIL? Where will you sleep? How on earth is whether or not the cat can roam indoors at night somehow the biggest problem here?

I am a devoted cat servant myself, and will go to great lengths to ensure their happiness. But this is just bonkers.

Don't think this is comparable? I'm not talking about mon beloved fils!

Hang on, I need to get this straight, are you referring to your cat as DS?

To people suggesting Airbnb, this is quite difficult due to another issue where DSis stole my phone number to activate her Airbnb account. This prevents me from logging into/viewing Airbnbs, and means Airbnb generally a sore spot between us. Don't think we can get into it!

This is mad. You are letting your obnoxious sister dictate that she is visiting & taking over your home. And your dh is moving out to accommodate this.
It doesn't matter it's a christening. This is your home. You should have told her no to begin with.
Say sorry she can't stay, it's just too impractical and that you should have been firmer in saying no before. IF you want to be nice look up a couple of B&Bs/Premier Inns/cheap hotels & send her the links. Air BnB is not the only option.

It will probably end the relationship but she has no respect for you or your home & just uses you to save herself money. If she can't see how selfish she is being then it's no great loss to you if she has a hissy fit & storms out of your life.

Well it sounds your DSIS is a bit of a nightmare but how does your partner feel about you prioritising your sister and cat over your partner and actual human baby?

OP, my DD had her SIL, husband and THREE children who billeted themselves on them - they live in a small 2 bed flat with one bathroom. After their less than successful visit, DD said to her DH that this was not working and next time, SIL and family would have to make alternative arrangements. What is it about entitled family members, that they think they can just land themselves on people and utterly inconvenience and upset them? It’s not as though there aren’t many Airbnbs available. OP, I’d tell your DSis that unfortunately they can’t stay at yours because you don’t have enough space and it would be massively inconvenient.

What have I just read?
You are being a total doormat. When they arrive tell them you've changed your mind and direct them to the nearest Premier Inn/small hotel.

For the love of God please stop being such a wet wipe (you and your partner) and tell them to fuck off and stop allowing such bloody stupid demands of YOUR home. This is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve read on here!