AIBU to worry about my three-year-old spelling her name?

[Newbie1991]

My daughter is 3 turning in 4 in June. They said she quite advance in her speech which is great but today she said a teacher was mean to her.

She come from nursery school and said "Mrs X said mummy should spend more time at your spelling your name" and that the other kids are doing better than her.

I do fyi! But I don't want to force it especially as she's currently learning Welsh and English and also has glue ears in both ears (so I don't want to overpressure her)

I was wondering how common it was for a 3 year old to do this? We got a pencil grip to help and we are doing the dot dot name thing which she asked to use today and she had this comment.

Nothing been said to me? Not sure where to go. I don't want her to be disadvantage because of this.

Absolutely!

Thanks to everyone advice. I have dyslexia myself so I have been careful with what I am teaching her so I bought her today one of those wipe board book and some stickers when she does it correctly.

We read to her every night around 4/5 books which she loves and I do try to do as much with her as possible but sometimes she doesn't concentrate probably because of her age tbh.

I also don't want to overly pressure her, she is 3 not 6/7. I obviously want her achieve all her dreams but right now her biggest dream is ride a unicorn 🤣

Is Wales the same as England for school starting?

Are we talking about knowing the letters in her name? Recognising? Writing her name? Orally chanting the letters?

It’s quite normal for name writing to be a focus off the nursery in the last term before starting school. Most children joining Reception can “write” their name, often with indirect letter formation or in al capitals. They can tell you the names of the letters they have written. Your daughter is summer born and they would generally be the ones not doing it.

I’d get her secure in recognising it and having chats about the letters. I.e Sarah, you are out and about and see BUS STOP painted on the ground, can she spot the S etc.

She starts reception in September this year.

She said writing her name which we have been practicing with her in any case. I have also started singing her name as I find singing helps her remember (think she follow me there)

I will ask them tomorrow when I pick her up I guess and go from there.

Wales is not quite the same as England.

DD is 18 now so this might be slightly out of date, but I think is still accurate.

Most primary schools here have a year group before reception, called nursery, and it's usually just half a day (in DDs case the younger ones went in the morning, and the older ones in the afternoon). You don't have to send your kids until reception, but most parents tend to.

It's mostly learning through play, but they do do some reading, writing their name etc and some very basic Maths.

Jeeze! My eldest could just about write her very simple name at 4 when she started school and couldn't read at all, didn't know letter sounds etc. It all came at school & came quickly too once she was ready.

She is now an Oxbridge graduate with a good job so it didn't do her any harm!

Calm down and just let her enjoy being 3.
Kids all develop at different rates & when she is ready to write her name she will.

I spent many years working with 3 year olds. They were at the beginning to recognise their name written down on their peg etc stage. In all those years there were very few who could write their name.
Some 4 year olds nearly ready for school could but many could not.

Reading every night is amazing and will give her such a good start.

My daughter couldn’t write her own name at 3 and she left year 11 with 12 x grade 9’s. Teacher is being ridiculous. She is 3yrs old. I’d speak to her.

Sums it all up.

I feel like I’m seeing lots of threads lately about high expectations of children in nursery/reception. Has there been some sort of shift recently? I don’t remember this apparent pressure when mine were that age (several decades ago!) When you think that children in many other countries don’t start formal education till 5/6/7, it seems like overkill to have parents stressed about their 3yr olds not writing their names! I think the expectations put on nurseries to have children ‘school ready’ (by 4!) must have a lot to do with it. The pressure seems to start earlier and earlier.

Good grief, neither of my DCs could write their name at this age. DS couldn't write any letters at all (he has dyspraxia, but he wasn't alone in not being able to write letters).

She’s also bilingual with glue ear.

Do schools / teachers learn anything about outcomes / timelines for bilingual households? Genuine question not being snippy.

I was at school with a Philomena, she said it took ages for her to write her name.

No, maybe the first letter.

Poor old Philomena. My youngest daughter has a long, French sounding first name and definitely wasn't writing it as early as her sister!

My daughter is bilingual, if that makes a difference 😊 She was able to write her name before she went to school but three years of age is still very young and I really wouldn’t worry about it but I’d ask the teacher for clarity as it seems your daughter is feeling a bit shamed, poor thing.

3 is no age for this. Don’t waste headspace worrying.