Naming my mixed race child and Irish name?

[ihateyousarahm]

I'm pregnant with a child who will be mixed race. My family are Irish but we've lived in England for a couple of generations.

We want to respect the heritage and name our child a traditional Irish name. Some people have said it will be hard to pronoumce as it's an Irish name and we don't usually see the name and others have said it's a mixed race baby so don't. However when I said what name we should use, they don't know.

A girls name like Charlotte etc is English and although we have both lived in England for a couple of generations I'm torn.

Ideas please?

‘My family are Irish’; they’re not, they’re English as are you OP, this is on a par with the plastic paddy’s in the US, call themselves Irish though since gt gt gt granny arrived not one has set foot in Ireland.
I have Irish grandparents, but always refer to myself as Scottish, always find it odd people trying to identify with a nationality that they in reality have little connection to.

I'm not the OP.... And I agree with you.

Amy name you like is fine

We have mixed race dc - 1st name English, 2nd name from my European country and surname from DH Asian country

All the people trying to police who can claim they are Irish and who can’t - you do you, why are you so bothered? Can’t you imagine it might vary and others might feel differently to you perhaps due to the community they lived in, frequent visits back and forth, close connection to family still in Ireland or many other factors?

I think there is inconsistency. It really depends on where the person is from. I know people who find it weird somebody born and bred in England, to Irish grandparents calls themselves “Irish”, but would have no with somebody calling themselves “Chinese” or “Nigerian” if that’s where their grandparents were from.

I am like you. Calling myself after the place my grandparents were from feels weird.

But she isn't Irish, if she is counted as being Irish by that token I could be, or I could be Portuguese or Belgian. I have heritage from those countries, but I don't claim to be any of them. If she wants to give her child an Irish name that's fine, one of mine has a name that has its origins in Greece, but can we stop pretending that having an Irish granny makes you Irish? Or Belgian or Portuguese?

I have a child with an Irish name because I liked it. People do mispronounce it sometimes and spell it wrong sometimes. But my husband has one of those names that can be spelt two ways and people spell it the wrong way all the time. It really doesn't matter. Eventually people get used to things and learn how to spell things.

Not everyone thinks like that. And given you're not Irish you can quit using the term 'plastic paddy 😉

Love Sadhbh too. I know someone who spelt it Sive (like the John B Keane play) for her baby because she knew the dad’s relatives from the other side of the world would struggle with it.

I think use whatever name you like! But do consider an Irish name which is more commonly known or is more obvious in spelling / pronunciation - for your child's sake!

I don’t see it as pretending though, can’t someone have access to and connection to a culture with a little more flexibility than you’re suggesting? You can decide for yourself if you’re Portuguese, you are best placed to decide that. The OP even says “my family are Irish”. To me telling someone they can’t speak about being Irish if they weren’t born there is erasing a culture. Being raised by Irish parents in a country other than Ireland is an experience that is different to being raised by Italian parents, Nigerians parents, Australian parents etc etc and I find it depressing that people want to impose such limits and gatekeep like this.

If you're living in England, I'd say Orla yes, Caoimhe no. Being mixed race isn't relevant.

I didn't suggest using an easy name.

Lots of mixed race children and children of different different races have common British names at my daughters school. I wouldn’t say it was uncommon. I do think when a child has a cultural name other people who aren’t not part of that culture struggle with pronunciation and spelling.

Give them a middle name from the other culture??

There are 56 different ethnic groups in China, with a population of 1.4 billion. I’m pretty certain that there isn’t an agreed ‘Chinese look’ common to every one of those 1.4 billion. It’s a lazy assumption that people from such huge countries all have similar looks.

The r is pronounced differently in England and Ireland in some word positions, so names with r in them often sound different in the two countries.
I’ve often heard complaints on MN about the name Orla being mangled by English accents, for example.

I think it will be lovely for your baby to have an Irish name. And honestly, nothing is really unpronounceable if people make a small effort.

We know loads of people who are similar ethnic “combinations” (if I can call it that) and I think it’s quite common to use a first name from the Mum’s culture when the child has Dad’s surname if that surname is obviously from his ethnicity. Makes sense to reflect both.

You do you & let the OP claim whatever identity she feels connected to by heritage. Plastic paddy is a pretty offensive term applied to people who are raised in the culture of their family’s ethnic or cultural origins. There isn’t a time limit to be applied here.

@ParentofChildMultipleHeritage why is it different to being raised by Italian or Nigerian parents? Do they not have their own cultures? That seems just as dismissive to me!

A colleague of mine is half Scottish and half Nigerian .
She has a Scottish name and Nigerian second name .
It is probaby easier to pronounce the Nigerian name tbh

If the ‘Chinese looking’ family have been in England for ‘a couple of generations’, then of course they’re English. You’re massively overthinking the name thing, by the way.

I’m Irish and my ears bleed whenever I hear an Irish name spoken in any other accent but an Irish one. Sorry.

can we stop pretending that having an Irish granny makes you Irish

Well no, because it literally does make you Irish (assuming that your parents have registered you after birth as an Irish citizen born abroad). Or are you suggesting that Irish citizens are not, in fact....Irish?