To ask to bring my Partner to a Wedding

[OliveToboogie]

My cousins daughter is getting married in June. Myself my sibling and cousins are all invited to the Wedding. I am the only one Divorced but have been with my partner 7 months. Every other family member will be going as a couple would it be too cheeky to ask if I can bring my partner .

I wouldnt ask to bring my partner I would ask specifically if partners are invited or not then you're giving her the opportunity to extend the invite about a relationship she may not have thought about

God no, don't do this.

It's nice enough of the bride and groom to invite mum's cousins, which is a bit of a stretch without asking if a boyfriend of a few months can come along too.

Yes it would be. It’s 7months which is no time at all. Not even a partner yet. Sorry but this is very cheeky, they would have said +1 if they wanted.

It would be a bit cheeky as it doesn't sound like you are that closely related to the couple and you haven't been with your partner for terribly long.

7 months is no time .

YABU

Ask if it’s ok for him to come to the evening, rather than the whole day. If you are a close family, no harm in asking .. but be prepared in case it’s a “no”

I was a bridesmaid and I asked for a +1 for the evening do and was turned down. I was mortified and wished I hadn't asked! Don't do it!

When one of my closest friends got married she issued me a single invite with the instriction that I was tell her if I met someone - I.did and he was included as a plus one. Personally, I think it's rude to not invite a partner, I've had plus ones when I haven't even had a partner!

Don't do this. It's really rude to put people on the spot like that. If they wanted you to bring a plus one it would have said plus one on the invitation.

No of course not, if they wanted your new boyfriend there they’d have invited him, 😱

You can’t ask for a plus one - your cousin will have thought it all through and painstakingly gone through the guest list, table plans and what she can afford food wise BEFORE handing out invitations and for you to expect her to change her plans and incur more cost to accommodate your partner of 7 months when your already only her mum’s cousin is CF territory!!

Ive been seeing my partner over 7 months. I call him my partner

I think it's a bit rude to not invite a "partner" as in a long term, co-habiting relationship but I don't think it's rude not to think to include the bloke your mum's cousin has been dating for a few months.

If they wanted him there, they'd have invited him. It's a brand new relationship so I don't see why they would.

It would be exceptionally rude to ask for your boyfriend to go. The bride and groom will have made provision for food etc on the day for the numbers invited. We had this at our wedding and they were most put out when we said absolutely not.

My DH’s sister did this at our wedding—the issue was that there were x number of seats at the reception venue, and we had a person in each seat already. She got really funny about it, asking why so-and-so was allowed a +1, but she wasn’t (it was because they were all established, live-in partners, and hers was new—she wasn’t the only one invited as a solo).

Our venue had a strict limit on numbers. We have big families and friend groups and both do lots of clubs and had sociable jobs too, so we had to make some tough decisions. One of these was no partners unless married (or extremely long term with kids etc). One friend did ask if she could bring her boyfriend - I wanted to ask her which of our guests she would like us to cut out to make space for him!

I don’t think that the bride and groom need to invite anyone they don’t personally know.

Depending on what type of reception they are having, a place can be costly.
Given the bride and groom have never met your boyfriend I think it would be too much to self invite. They will feel awkward saying no. But could invite someone they know instead.

They're not your partner, they're a girlfriend or boyfriend.

Afters maybe. Ceramony and meal for a brand new partner no. If there was a way for them just to come after to have a drink and dance maybe. Not as a main guest

I really don’t understand why people expect you to go to a wedding alone. It’s so weird.

I think it's rude to ask for invite to something a person wasn't invite to.

The OP will have her family there so isn’t going to be alone. I don’t understand why the bride and groom should be expected to have someone they’ve never met at their wedding. That seems far more weird to me.

You can't ask, no. They haven't breached etiquette by not inviting if you don't live together, and you would breach etiquette by asking.