AIBU to think a cottage is not a holiday?

[Jogonpolly]

Looking to go away in half term (DH and 2DC age 7&10).

I'd ideally like a short haul all inclusive somewhere - good weather and easy for them kids to be occupied. But with the jet fuel issue I don't feel confident booking incase we lose our money.

I suggested going somewhere in Europe by train. A hotel, pool and play area some places to visit, maybe a city or something.

DH has suggested a cottage in the UK, Devon or somewhere. Problem is, I just don't see a cottage as a holiday - in a hotel someone makes your bed and cleans the bathroom. You can choose to eat out or in the hotel restaurant, you don't need to drive anywhere, decisions are easy, everything is easy. My experiences of cottages in the UK are of same shit, different (and more difficult)place. There will still be cleaning to do, breakfast to sort even if we do go out for lunch and dinner, there's more planning and organising. I think I'd just rather not go.

AIBU and a misery?

And before people say it, yes, DH will do some of the organising and cleaning but still, it's just like being at home!

I'd also be happy with a city break, sightseeing etc. doesn't need to be an all inclusive place!

I hate staying in hotels. Always pick a cottage in the uk or villa/apartment abroad. I find hotels less flexible and restrictive. My favourite part about a holiday is all getting up in our own time, making ourselves some breakfast and pottering around at our own pace. When the kids were little we used to put them to bed at normal time then chill with wine and books!

We have hotels in the UK. St Ives is nice, Carbis Bay hotel or the Harbour hotel both lovely and have spa's....or millions of others all over the country depending on where you fancy. Many of them have lovely heated indoor pools too.

But I’m with you op about cottages, too much faff easier to stay home with just a few exceptions with kids, easier for adults only

What a horrible post. There is no need to be so defensive over your choice of holiday you attack a mum who doesn’t fancy it.

Yanbu, I mean it's nice to have a change of scene but after 16 years of cottage/house self catering holidays I cannot explain the absolute joy of going abroad to an all inclusive and having someone else be responsible for all cooking, cleaning, bed making etc and also not having to decide what everyone is having for meals. Bliss. We may do cottage holidays when the kids are all grown and left home but never again as a family.

This when you arrive it's clean,if you are there a week just how much cleaning do you expect to do?
You don't take your own bedding, and if you aren't in to cooking just go out for every meal? Or buy easy stuff like a pack of croissants for breakfast that requires nothing except opening the packet and eating them.
If you don't cook and eat in the cottage you don't have to wash up pots and pans.
I don't get why people imagine they will spend the holiday cleaning if they stay in a cottage what the heck are you doing to the place to make it such a mess 😂

I agree it's not a real holiday. I'd want to go to a resort with a pool and hot weather with my kids.

If you book a package like TUI you shouldn’t lose your money. If they have to cancel they will refund you. Like in Covid

And if you live in an urban area the location makes ALL the difference?? So what if you have to wash up some cups and plates you aren't at home looking out on a grey urban street of semis you are in a beautiful location looking out at the sea and you can spend the day doing stuff like going to the beach, you can't do that at home?!

For me an all inclusive resort would be something I would rather avoid - But it’s different strokes for different folks!

but if your going to go with a “this will be shit” attitude then it’s best not going because your attitude will make sure it is shit for everyone!

I didn’t think it was horrible at all! I included some practical suggestions, and also thought I’d spotted an issue which is colouring the OP’s view of this possible holiday. My post is definitely not an ‘attack’, in fact it’s supportive of the OP not having to be a slave to her family. You are being unnecessarily defensive on someone else’s behalf.

We do self catering sometimes in the UK and we never cook much in the cottage or apartment. We don't do cleaning or washing or anything we don't want to and we book to eat out most nights. That's the only way it's a holiday and you're right, if you end up doing chores that isn't a break, it's same shit, different place.

Can you not stay in a hotel in the UK?

I’ve always loved a cottage, choose them over resorts or hotels tbh, though a bed and breakfast is ok

you just need to be organised, I always take bedding and towels because I prefer to do that, but a lot of resort type places make the beds for you.

breakfast - I take paper plates/bowls and a selection box of cereal (holiday traditions and the only time I would buy them) yogurt fruit etc. arrange for a shop delivery the day you are due to arrive is a good idea. Individual cartons of fruit juice etc anything to limit the washing up. There’s always a decent cafe sort of place that do cooked breakfast if you want.

lunch - normal a picnic, again, paper stuff and cartoons, stop at the bakery on the way out for rolls etc of pop into a little shop for anything you want. We buy as per the day part of the fun.

evening meal - eat out or fish and chips .

we soon got a good routine, arrive DH unpacks car whilst I would inspect the house, kids snacks/loo/ explore whilst we make beds and wipe round if needed. Honesty it would take half hour tops if you’re organised.

daily - morning one of us walk to the bakery with kids whilst the other clears round quickly. Who says beds have to be made, just shake the covers or straighten the sleeping bag (not just for camping in my opinion for the kids anyway) evening - one puts the kids to bed, the other sorts out rubbish from the day, repacks the beach bags etc and opens the wine - easy.

dayof leave- Chuck all bedding in the car to be washed when home, clear away anything you’ve left, stick bin out and that’s it.

i would recommend the Isle of Wight (which if you’ve read this far you will love ). There’s some lovely cottage type places and also resorts. We’ve stayed in them all at one time or another. The resorts offer food and entertainment if you’re into that sort of thing, the kids love it even if you don’t. There’s so much to see and do even in the rain, and black gang chine is a must you can buy a ticket which gives you entrance for a week and the kids never tire of it, everything is included at the price too.

I agree, its not what Id consider a holiday. For me a holiday is sitting in the sun for 2 weeks, reading my book, getting up when I wake up, chilling by the pool, eating what I fancy when I fancy it (having not made it myself), not doing any food shopping, washing up, bathroom cleaning etc & just generally enjoying relaxing with no need to leave my sun lounger.

Any holiday in this country doesnt guarentee the sun so its not something I would ever do as the most important part of my holiday is not being cold for 2 weeks out of the 52 in a year!

Ive done multiple caravan park breaks, holiday cottage breaks in this country when my DC were younger - never again! The weather was awful/unpredictable & they actually cost more than going abroad for guarenteed sun as we had to spend money on activities everyday as we could just laze around in the sun & pool every day. Plus the cost of eating out wasnt comparable to that abroad.

I prioritise going somewhere sunny for 2 weeks each year & I hope that I get to go on the holidays Ive booked for this year as I need them!!

I guess, because we don't spend any time in the room. We're out by the pool or sight seeing all day so I don't find it cramped.

In a holiday cottage the kids get bored because they don't have the same resources at home so there's no time for the adults to sit and relax, read etc as the kids need more entertaining.

that is the point, different view lol and also can eat out more than normal. Get to stay in a lovely place etc.

I hate staying in hotels and b&bs for many reasons.

I quote like a cottage it love camping out of all. Everything about camping is hard work! But it's what I enjoy.

An all inclusive hotel holiday by a pool would be my idea of hell!

But we all l like different things so YANBU to want the sort of holiday you enjoy.

I only ever stay in hotels when I’m
travelling for work or if we are only staying somewhere for a single night (eg attending a wedding or in transit to somewhere else)

All inclusive sounds awful to me.

I much prefer a nice cottage/city apartment/villa.

I agree with this - especially for a short break I’d always go for the cottage - I just get treaty food that needs absolutely minimal prep and I barely lift a finger. It’s worth it to be able to get a tea or coffee whenever I like without paying four quid or whatever and have a lounge garden etc to relax in rather than just a hotel room. For a longer stay I agree all inclusive hotel is the way forward though - you don’t want to start having to think about recycling / dishwasher too much!

I like a cottage for the extra space.
However I have never cooked, cleaned or stripped beds.
Basics for breakfast and eat out lunch and dinner.

OTOH there are hotels in the UK so you could still do that, self catering isn't the only option.

I won’t stay in self catering, I only do all inclusive or cruises etc. Holidays are my break from cooking and cleaning and filling the dishwasher!

If I didn’t have two small kids I might feel differently.

Very much a holiday for me but of it's not your thing don't do it. I don't find being in a hotel for more than a couple of days with loads of other people relaxing.

So go out sight seeing or (e.g.) to the beach all day when you are in a holiday cottage. Or choose a cottage with a swimming pool.

No reason for you to spend more time indoors then you do when you stay in a hotel.

Do the children stay up late and go to bed at the same time as you? Because that's always been the huge disadvantage of a hotel for me; if you're in a family room you all basically have to go to bed at the same time or adults have to tiptoe round; you can't go anywhere once the children are in bed (with a cottage you can at least sit in the garden).

If you enjoy hiking and mountain bikes, or castles and nice views, or beaches and surfing then a cottage in a nice part of the uk can be a fabulous holiday. If you’re not too bothered about those things and instead want a much higher density of history and cultural attractions then yes a city break is a better choice.

Self catering for a week or two there’s not much cleaning needed, just eat out or have meals that need minimal prep. Toast and coffee in the morning shouldn’t be a big deal in terms of effort. However if you’re really burned out with the chores at home I understand why you’d want a total break. I’d be annoyed if my boss said while I’m on leave, why not just answer a few emails and keep your phone on in case we need you, it’s not like it’s a full workload, should be manageable… I want to switch off fully from work for a little bit. You’re saying that you want to completely disconnect from chores and organizing everything for a week, just having less to do fails to offer the total break if you still feel responsible. Fair enough.