AIBU to think a cottage is not a holiday?

[Jogonpolly]

Looking to go away in half term (DH and 2DC age 7&10).

I'd ideally like a short haul all inclusive somewhere - good weather and easy for them kids to be occupied. But with the jet fuel issue I don't feel confident booking incase we lose our money.

I suggested going somewhere in Europe by train. A hotel, pool and play area some places to visit, maybe a city or something.

DH has suggested a cottage in the UK, Devon or somewhere. Problem is, I just don't see a cottage as a holiday - in a hotel someone makes your bed and cleans the bathroom. You can choose to eat out or in the hotel restaurant, you don't need to drive anywhere, decisions are easy, everything is easy. My experiences of cottages in the UK are of same shit, different (and more difficult)place. There will still be cleaning to do, breakfast to sort even if we do go out for lunch and dinner, there's more planning and organising. I think I'd just rather not go.

AIBU and a misery?

And before people say it, yes, DH will do some of the organising and cleaning but still, it's just like being at home!

I'd also be happy with a city break, sightseeing etc. doesn't need to be an all inclusive place!

Cottage holidays is all I do. I hate going abroad

I love cottage holidays but location is important - a cottage by a lake with a beach not too close to anyone else? Perfectly. A cottage situated about one metre from its neighbours with no nature in sight? No thanks.

We do cottage holidays every few years, best one was in a cottage all by itself next to a lake. No electricity so no one was distracted by screens and we just swam in the lake and picked berries and went fishing. And no neighbours to see when I went skinny dipping in the middle of the night

If you're doing it that way then you're doing it wrong 😊

Maybe your husband recognises you can't afford an all inclusive foreign holiday at the moment? Times are hard for a lot of people at the moment.

Uabu to say it's not a holiday. UANBU to say it's not the type of holiday you want.

Why don’t you look into Potters? All inclusive resorts in the UK with loads of activities for the kids that are included in the price. I have never been but have family that go regularly and really enjoy it

Ficinothricegreat- you have obviously booked the wrong places and not done proper research. When DC were young, we went to some really lovely AI and we were also allowed to leave and do other things/eat elsewhere. Whilst it is not my first go-to now, they certainly have there merits. DC have had amazing experiences and as a lone parent I met some great people if I felt like being sociable.

This, 100%. Especially the 'no people' bit.

Weirdly, I actually love camping and we camp twice a year every year BUT we are really selective about the sites we go to (quite, basic and loads of space) and we go with other people with kids, communal parenting and the kids entertain each other. We also eat out for most meals. Making packed lunches is my idea of hell!

I suspect that I find holiday cottages as much work as camping but with extra stress of a lack of stuff for the kids to do and being in someone else's house.

NAGS HEAD, NC—

Continuously doing laundry, cooking, or vacuuming in her family’s rented beach cottage this week, area mom Catherine Yardley has spent a much-needed vacation performing all her usual household chores while in closer proximity to the ocean, sources confirmed. “Isn’t it nice to just get away for a while and relax by the water?” Yardley said as she wiped down the kitchen counter and then took out the garbage, tasks she would normally perform at a distance of 200 miles from the beach instead of 50 feet. “I just love that I can be scrubbing the bathroom, look out the window, and see the tide coming in. We should do this every year!” At press time, Yardley was reportedly busy preparing a meal identical to what she would have made back home, except that she planned to serve it on paper plates.

I think it depends on the cottage and the location.
I love a cottage near a beach or in The Lakes, especially a period property, or one with loads of character, it's a good base for seeing the local area, and there is enough room for everyone to have their own space.
We have never had to properly clean, just empty the bin on the last day, and put the dishwasher on. We have stayed in some beautiful cottages, I would do plenty of research first though.

YABU to suggest it isn't a holiday in general terms - obviously it is, just not the type of holiday you want to go on.

Personally I love a self-catering cottage and find them really relaxing - no employees or other guests to contend with, no housekeeping knocking on the door. Travelling as two adults there's surely not much mess being made on a day to day basis that actually needs attending to? You can still go out to eat if you prefer that. For me I like the option of being able to cook at home, saves money and it's enjoyable to source local ingredients and cook with them. They're quiet good value and we usually stay somewhere much nicer than our own home - lovely views, good quality linen and towels, lovely welcome packs etc.

Each to their own though, we are all different. I wouldn't go on a holiday I didn't want go on and would just go alone instead if I felt that strongly about going to a specific place.

Go here:

https://www.hotelsone.com/holywood-hotels-gb/culloden-estate-spa.html?dsti=17397&dstt=8&nid=1&as=g&aid=693690178039&cmpid=20703726143&agid=161337259593&gid=CjwKCAjw46HPBhAMEiwASZpLRNfV9BlD0rb31p5di3M6bU00J8ItStoFfTDfHZ13CVobQghPZVnqlRoCvVwQAvD_BwE&gwbrd=Cj4KCAjwwJzPBhA1Ei4Apa5P46LGdjJxFDH1ZUx6uvmgF03t4nbbEvAITRh_Zz86ENH6iTficIusIZDjGgJ1RA&ggbrd=0AAAAAD4o1PdLigYNHlN3YZK_iCnSHYsaX&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=20703726143&gbraid=0AAAAAD4o1PdLigYNHlN3YZK_iCnSHYsaX&gclid=CjwKCAjw46HPBhAMEiwASZpLRNfV9BlD0rb31p5di3M6bU00J8ItStoFfTDfHZ13CVobQghPZVnqlRoCvVwQAvD_BwE

15 minutes from the airport, 20 minutes from the city centre, beach 5 minutes away. All you need is the weather (that might be the tricky part!)

Why would you need to clean the toilet? Unless you've had diarrhea? We have stayed in loads of holiday cottages and love it. We don't make any mess anyway so there's no housework to do. That's what they pay cleaners for which is why you have to be out by 10.00am.

I also find that with self catering the condition of the accommodation is always a bit of a gamble. Photos always look nice but I hate discovering that the place is not well maintained / smells of damp / if not that clean / etc

No, our kids go to bed at regular time usually..sometimes a bit later if we've been out for a later dinner. But they sleep really well so no tiptoeing around, can have the lights on and music or TV.

But also, the AI places we've been to have tended to have either 2 bedrooms or a lounge and bedroom or a decent balcony/ garden.

You're not being unreasonable to dislike the idea but it is unreasonable to say it isn't a holiday.

I can relax much more in self-catering and I eat out or have food that only needs heating up to minimise labour. You mention breakfast, must it be elaborate? Cereal, fruit, yogurt or toast will do - you don't need to cook.

But it's your holiday, you and your DH need to find a compromise you can agree on.

I love cottage holidays. I don't clean or cook. We do make tea and coffee, maybe some toast but we find local cafes for meals.

I do struggle to see why it’s harder to entertain children in a cottage with lots of room and a garden than a hotel room?

You’re right - it’s the same shit in a different place and generally with worse appliances than at home!

I loved a cottage holiday when the dc were small. Still do. I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than queue for breakfast at an AI hotel and have to change and be tidy for dinner. I've always found cottages very freeing. No housework to do, no jobs to do, just meals, loading a dishwasher and tidying a duvet. Barbecue for dinner if not out and footie/cricket with daddy. We had some wonderful bucket and spade holidays in Norfolk and Cornwall.

I prefer self catering. I try and get the best accommodation I can afford, usually a lodge on a site, and ideally with a hot tub.

Butlins did a house keeping service with their premium accommodation so daily cleaning was provided. We did this a couple of times at Minehead. Loved it.

Linen and towels always provided - but I take extra towels if there is a hot tub.

Usually a there is a dishwasher and a washer dryer so I can dry towels overnight.
Our evening meal routine is usually takeaway/eat out/pasta tray bake cooked in accommodation/takeaway/eat out/ etc on rotation.

Before we leave for the day I run the dishwasher, even if it's just got breakfast stuff in it and mugs and glasses from the night before. It's done by the time we return.

I personally don't find I do a great deal of cleaning. DH or DS sprays and wipes the kitchen surfaces before we go out each day while I am doing the dishwasher and every couple of days one of us sweeps the floor, takes a few minutes.

Loos are obviously kept clean by us - but even in a hotel you would sort out a poo-streaked loo yourself.

Holidays are what you make them and I find self catering allows more flexibility - and more room to spread out.

I get it - I'm the opposite and would hate being crammed into a hotel room with my kids. But what sort of cottages have you been looking at? And how dirty do your towels get?!

For us, self-catering means views, privacy, everyone has their own bedroom and even bathroom, no set mealtimes... The cottages of my childhood were chintzy and grim but the ones we stay in now are spotless with nice bedding and towels and some even provide beach towels and kit. Washing clothes throughout the week is (light) work but I actually like it as it means I don't come back to the post-holiday laundry mountain.

Most places are really not too demanding - not all ask you to strip the beds, emptying the bins doesn't take long, and you just fill the dishwasher and put it on as you leave. OK you wouldn't do that in a hotel but it really isn't a huge process. Look for good reviews and some personal touches from the owner.

The trick is to put yourself in a different mindset, behave differently and make it a holiday. Book somewhere in a great location, with on-site facilities if that's what you want. I treat myself to a Waitrose delivery on day 1 and order treats and breakfast foods like croissants that I wouldn't buy at home. We don't slave away cooking, we either go out for dinner or make easy things/buy food from local farm shops, and bring wine and gin. I find it so much more relaxing than being in a hotel.

A holiday is where you can relax, spend the day as you wish and do as little or as much as you want.

If you hate the idea of s/c than it's not a holiday. But I wouldn't touch a hotel in the UK, too small for unpredictable weather, too expensive.

For us, an AI or not AI resort started to be a non-relaxing place. I really started hating the big buffet restaurant, the noise, the chaos around the pool.

So over the last years we mixed it up. Appartment if we are on a city break/base for sightseeing in one area for more than just 3 nights as it means more space and it's a lot cheaper as we need 2 rooms. We normally only do breakfast or may grab stuff for a sandwich. I didn't turn on the hob one year at all.

Hotels are lovely if I am somewhere I don't want to figure out the logistic of finding a grocery store or I don't speak the language at all and don't want to put every grocery item through a translation tool. Even then I book B&B only as we aren't people staying at the pool all day.

And I never clean a cottage. I may have a pack of wipes to go around the sink but the most I do is stripping beds while DH loads the car and bring out the bins. Three plates and mugs are hardly a hardship to wash up.
I book one with a dishwasher, linen, towels.

My partner says "let's get a cottage" and my reply is "I don't want to cook or wash up for a few days".