AIBU to think a cottage is not a holiday?

[Jogonpolly]

Looking to go away in half term (DH and 2DC age 7&10).

I'd ideally like a short haul all inclusive somewhere - good weather and easy for them kids to be occupied. But with the jet fuel issue I don't feel confident booking incase we lose our money.

I suggested going somewhere in Europe by train. A hotel, pool and play area some places to visit, maybe a city or something.

DH has suggested a cottage in the UK, Devon or somewhere. Problem is, I just don't see a cottage as a holiday - in a hotel someone makes your bed and cleans the bathroom. You can choose to eat out or in the hotel restaurant, you don't need to drive anywhere, decisions are easy, everything is easy. My experiences of cottages in the UK are of same shit, different (and more difficult)place. There will still be cleaning to do, breakfast to sort even if we do go out for lunch and dinner, there's more planning and organising. I think I'd just rather not go.

AIBU and a misery?

And before people say it, yes, DH will do some of the organising and cleaning but still, it's just like being at home!

I'd also be happy with a city break, sightseeing etc. doesn't need to be an all inclusive place!

I much prefer a cottage with a garden so the kids can kick a football around, we take bikes etc. We eat out every night and go to a local bakery for fresh bread and coffee every morning. Lovely!

Hotels/apartments aren’t great as the kids end up on screens too much.

Completely agree. I prefer it to a hotel, I want a whole house, somewhere to sit on a comfy sofa. I want to get up when I want and not be expecting housekeeping to knock on the door at any moment.

I love arriving at a clean cottage and not having to clean any more. I want to wake up when I want to and not be waiting for housekeeping to knock on the door. And I want my own outside space, a garden and seating area. Home or abroad, we do a mixture of eating out , takeaways and barbecues, part of the enjoyment is exploring maybe a French market or supermarket and eating what is local. I want a home away from home !

There is a film called The Holiday where Cameron Diaz literally stays in a cottage.

It’s just a different type of holiday but a holiday for sure.

I love an abroad holiday but also a wee staycation in a cosy cottage in some part of our amazing country.

I love self catering cottages in the UK. Going to one which is 200m to the pub very soon
I prefer as with some organisation the child has games/books/quiet activities to entertain her
And actually the cleaning/meal prep isn't arduous- and is on a note on my phone as well as the packing list.. And do some prep on where to go for both meals and entertainment....
Tend to keep to simple meals/ go out.... And we normally take some basic kitchen supplies- salt, pepper, spray oil, spices and gravy granules, as well as scales, sharp knives, several tea towels and often an electric mixer ....
I honestly love cooking though on holiday when I have time, not so much when I get in at 6 and have to have the dinner done in 10 minutes to get kids to bed.... Anyway I love it- love exploring new places, walking the coast path and generally seeing our beautiful country...

@Jogonpolly

Would you like Tresco?

www.tresco.co.uk/

For me it won't feel like a holiday. A holiday is new smells, new sights, going to the supermarket and seeing food never seen or tried before (and buying a few bits). Seeing wildlife can't see in the UK, hearing a different language, feeling the sun on my face (not a given in the UK!).

My other half used to go to a caravan holiday with is last partner. He presumed I would be interested in doing the same, nope. My idea of pure hell. He then went fishing with his dad every year instead in a rented cottage, which costs more than going overseas somewhere nice. Can't see the point of it myself. I want to see the world, not more of the same rubbish in the UK.

Why not compromise and a hotel in Devon? Fairly easy, if the weather is ok you can get in the outdoor pool, and lots of places to eat with no housework.
I would guess going around Europe by train would be fairly difficult and expensive, but maybe that's not true, and if someone knows better, I'd be interested to hear about recommendations myself!

I like self catering if the accommodation is nice ish and we are on site to lots of facilities within walking distance ie beach, pool, bar, playground etc. My ex used to live the idea of cottage in middle of nowhere then not understand my no one liked it.

If itsa holiday for both, don't do it.

See I would hate to be in a hotel with DC that age.

One room I assume so you have to go to bed when they do, can't sit and watch TV or even chat; or adjoining rooms but still have to be there. Have to have meals when hotel decrees, which makes no allowance for early riser DC/lazy mornings. Very little space for you.

Cottage could (should) offer rooms for everyone, proper bathroom not the horrid en suite tiny thing, living room where you can all sit and watch a movie or your and DH can have a drink and relax; maybe a garden to have a kickabout, bit kitchen to eat in.

My rule was that the cottage had to be at least as nice and spacious as our actual house (not hard with three DC in a three-bed semi with a tiny kitchen).

You can still eat out if you want but you have the cheaper option of cooking. Make it easy. And "sorting breakfast"? Don't your DC get their own? Also a PP - take your own bedding? who does that in a cottage?

I am a clean freak btw but even I didn't use to iron on holiday, or clean that much beyond hoovering every couple of days.

I don't clean when self-catering and straightening a duvet hardly counts as making a bed.

Breakfast sorts itself. Lunch is either something very easy or eaten out. Evening either eaten out or takeaway. Generally therefore much more choice than in a hotel.

Self-catering is also much more relaxing than hotels. Plenty of room to chill out at all times. No being cooped up in hotel.rooms. Make a quick cup of tea or grab a snack. Kids get their own room(s). Often come with extra entertainment like gardens, pool tables, board games.

Oooh yes @Konstantine8364 having to be dressed for breakfast! Who wants that ever?

It's still a holiday- if you are not eating in all the time and are not in your home town how is that like being at home? I think not wanting to organise some cereal and toast and do some very light cleaning is a bit entitled TBH.

Problem is, I just don't see a cottage as a holiday - in a hotel someone makes your bed and cleans the bathroom. You can choose to eat out or in the hotel restaurant, you don't need to drive anywhere, decisions are easy, everything is easy. My experiences of cottages in the UK are of same shit, different (and more difficult)place. There will still be cleaning to do, breakfast to sort even if we do go out for lunch and dinner, there's more planning and organising.

When you said this to your DH, what was his response?

"I would inspect the house, kids snacks/loo/ explore whilst we make beds and wipe round if needed. Honesty it would take half hour tops if you’re organised."

Why are you making beds and wiping around? Every holiday cottage I've been in has all beds made up and the place thoroughly cleaned.
We've been been self-catering in the UK every year for 30 years and never encountered any different.

I love a cottage or apartment, we always do that wherever we go. I'm looking forward to a lovely apartment in Venice this summer. I hate hotels and just having a bedroom and no lounge or kitchen. I also hate eating out for every meal, sometimes I just want to eat on the sofa while relaxing.

But if you don't enjoy that, then go to a hotel. We are all different

You are right, a cottage is not a holiday.

A cottage is a small, typically modest, and cosy house, often located in a rural or semi-rural setting, frequently featuring traditional designs like thatched roofs or stone construction whereas a holiday is a period of time during which you relax and enjoy yourself away from home.

But just because your mother chose to watch TV all day doesn't mean everyone does. What an odd argument.

I think if you're really dead set against it it's not a good idea as you're not going to enjoy it as your husband and kids will be aware that you're unhappy.
Some sort of compromise is clearly required but i'm not sure what that would look like.
Personally i love a cottage holiday, but each to their own 🙂

When the kids were smaller it was much more relaxing just having a chilled out breakfast in pyjamas than having to get everyone organised to go down for breakfast, often miles away, where everything took twice as long because of the huge amount of choice and was twice as stressful managing 5 excitable children so they didn't disrupt other guests.

I understand your point if you are the person who is always responsible for cleaning and cooking and tidying.
maybe pledge to treat it like an actual holiday, eating out, breakfast out, the odd takeaway do you don’t get dragged into domestic drudgery?

Airports are the worst part of a holiday abroad. Can't imagine anyone enjoying that bit.
There is no 'to-do' list on a self catering holiday if you don't want one.
No cleaning. No cooking. No washing (although I prefer to get some washing done so as not to have a huge pile when I get home).
And best of all - lots of space, lots of sofas, big cold fridge for drinks and freezer for ice cubes. A hotel room just doesn't have the facilities.

It's just a different sink not a holiday

Where were you thinking of going where there’s no pubs or restaurants? I liked a cottage holiday when I had small kids. Easier to lounge around if they needed an afternoon nap or an early night. You can still go out for food, although I suppose if you tend to eat mostly in your hotel restaurant then it’s less convenient. I’ve never had to do laundry or bring bedding, most holiday cottages are serviced in between guests.

Well it is a holiday.

But I agree with you that it's a bit shit. Still making meals, but it's harder as nothing is the same as home and there's never everything you want utensil wise etc. It's all a faff. Give me a hotel and meals out instead anyway of the week.

In fact on reflection, I'd much rather have a staycation and spend money on good days out/ nice meals out, and come home to my own bed than go on a cottage holiday ever again.

No, of course there’s not as much cleaning as at home. Literally all the cleaning I’ve ever done in a holiday cottage is putting mugs and glasses in a dishwasher and wiping a j-cloth over a worktop, at the absolute most. I’ve never cleaned a loo in a holiday cottage in my life. You don’t need to. They literally send someone in to clean the whole place after you’ve left.

You don’t have to do anything in the same way that you’d do it at home, because you are not at home. When we go on a self-catering holiday we’re not running around with a Hoover, dusting and putting some laundry on!

I love hotels for city breaks, or if it’s a holiday where we’re moving around spending a few nights here and a few nights there, but for a week or a fortnight where I want to do a bit more relaxing, my best holidays have been self-catering ones. We still eat out every night but the additional space and comfort, and not being boxed in next to other people or being confined to a balcony for outdoor space, not having to sit on the bed every time we’re at our accommodation etc is always lovely.

Each to their own, obviously, but I find it a bit odd when people say the reason they don’t like something is because they think they have to do things that you do not, in fact, have to do at all.