Aibu Retiring at 55 - 30 years of idleness?

[Scotsknowbest]

So this is the thing: so many local friends have given up working in the last few years in their early to mid 50s, aibu to think what on earth are you going to do to stay interested and interesting?
I thought perhaps they would shut the house up and set off on a big trip but holidays have been more like 2 weeks in Greece instead of one.
I thought perhaps they would volunteer but that seems too restrictive for them.
I thought some might use their professional skills to join executive boards as NEDs or in advisory roles. But no.
Some have upped their golf or tennis, some are focusing on the garden (what, every day?) some walk the dog, read the paper.
I just think they will become so boring!
In contrast I caught up with 3 old school friends this evening who I see about once or twice a year. I asked them when they thought they would retire and each thought mid 60s.
Many of my friends have inherited recently and I think this has been the nudge. I have also inherited but I don't feel any different!
Just for context I am 57, work in 2 roles, one executive, board level, one professional but different area (social work) which takes me to about 4 days a week but I also run 4 properties as a landlord and have an aging dad who lives a mile away who I help with admin, appointments, organising stuff. I also have 2 grown kids the youngest at uni, 1st year. So, not as busy as when I worked and had little kids, but pretty busy in a good way. Personally I can't imagine stopping working so aibu, is 50to55 simply too young to be retiring even if the catalyst has been a windfall inheritance?

What jobs did your friends do, @Scotsknowbest do that makes you think that shifting their focus to gardening etc will drain them of interest? Before they retired, did you spend all your time with them swapping exciting anecdotes about day-to-day office life?

Is your own work the only thing that gives you a sense of meaning in life? If so, you are either very lucky to have an exciting/rewarding job or very unlucky to have no other reservoirs of meaning.

And why would ten years make such a difference? If you can't think of how to have a satisfying retirement as 55, why would you think that things would be any different at 65, or 75. Perhaps you need to begin cultivating other parts of yourself in preparation.

I'd retire tomorrow. But I was a sahm for 8yrs, before going to work in a school office job for 9yrs to see my DC through private school.

However given that I had so much time at home for so long in my 30s, it would feel like an extention of that rather than retirement.

That said I've got absolutely no idea what I would do with my time once the DC leave home in a year or two other than some nice holidays!. I used to be busy all the time when DC were little and I was at home......Now I've spent several of the school holiday days in and out of bed having a nap as I've very little to do and I'm bloody knackered.

Physically, when I was 40 I was running 5miles twice a week. Now, at 48, I am limited to weights, walking and swimming. I can't even ride a bike. Work feels so much harder and I have no stamina.

So yes I'd retire now. There's some travel I'd like to do before my physical health gets even worse. Despite eating a fecking marvellous diet and doing as much exercise as I possibly can.

I retired at 66, now 71, I couldnt wait to retire, though was very apprehensive about it at the time. I hated my job so left in 2nd covid lockdown. Used to get up at 4am for work and didnt get home till 6pm. Did all housework washing and ironing at the weekends and was exhausted when I retired.
My hubby is 8 years younger than me and is still working but he can't wait til he retires.
I love being at home and not having anyone boss me about and watching the clock all the time. There is simply not enough hours in the day and can't believe how, when I worked, I manage everything.
If you can afford to retire early do so, you never know how long you will live. So make the most of your life

I think your life sounds boring OP.

DH and I are semi retired. Both early 50s.

I am self employed and pick up and drop work to fit in with life and DH has just finished a 30yr career with a military pension. He’s picked up a little part time job so we can help with uni fees and go on lots of holidays (not all big ones). We also want to keep his pension free so we can be frivolous with meals and holidays if we want.

I love gardening. If I could I would do it every day. You can as there’s always so much to do. DH had an expensive, time consuming hobby so spends a lot of time planning and training. To be honest, we would both like to give up work all together.

I retired at 58 and now in my mid sixties am so busy I think work was easier. I have 6 grandchild I do regular care. I'm thinking of buying a derelict house at auction I provide care for both sets of parents. We go to museums and art galleries recently took up watercolors I run knitting classes and workshops. I go to the gym 4 times a week and workout with friends. Have a massive garden with a veg plot and together we do all our own DIY we recently laid a drive (he did most of it it was too cold for me if I'm being honest) The demands on my time are constant and recently I've started designating Sat as a 'day off'. I've worked since I was 12 and if you think I'm boring that's fine with me. I'll surround myself with my friends who all think feel and enjoy life as much as I do.

My aunt died suddenly at 66, she was in good health and still working.

I think 55 is early to retire but no one knows how long they will live and it’s sad to have no retirement.

I retired a month ago at 49.

of the people I was at uni with one is dead of sepsis and one retired last week (cancer),

I’m medically retired.
I do have a boring and small life, but that’s how it is when your body stops working.

the incidence of cancer, heart attack etc really starts to ramp up during your 50s. If you make it to 67 totally healthy you are already quite lucky.

my dad got cancer a year after he retired.

I enjoy volunteering, I always wanted to work for a charity but the pay just wasn’t good enough, so I’m doing that. I have taken quite a few classes
t’ai chi, Pilates, watercolours and belly dancing since I retired. they are hobbies I have done before but didn’t have time for. We have bought a Motorhome since DH joined me and have so far managed 2 months away. We are also both polishing up our French and DH is also improving his Spanish and German in anticipation of travelling next year. We hope to go to Asia and America and possibly Australia for a few months over the next 3 years.

DH is still running some international research committee that’s also involves giving an award to the best young scientist in his field every year and doing the odd bit of work as a visiting academic. He has also catalogued my 1,500 book collection which I’m planning on selling this coming winter. Both of us but especially him keeps an eye on markets to maximise our returns.

I have a lot of friends who have retired early, many do voluntary work. From teaching adults to read to giving free legal advice to a National charity. Maybe we are all just do gooders but many of us worked in teaching or higher education so like helping others. I planned my retirement from 21.

I hear of so many people that die within a year or 2 of retirement at 65, or who die before they get to that age. So if I can I want to retire in my 50s and try to have a long and peaceful retirement.

I retired at 50 with a decent lump sum and monthly pension, 33 years in Civil Service from 17.

I had a senior (CFO) job which I got sacked from. Now in a none mngt role. I no longer enjoy work, and realise lots of people probably never have. If I stopped tomorrow I wouldn't have a backwards glance

With the amount of people I've known of through work who have died soon after retirement due to cancer, I would retire at the earliest opportunity if I could. You never know how long you have.

I plan to downsize the house and retire as early as is feasible. While it’s lovely to be optimistic, and I guess if you’ve had very long lived relatives you feel that’s the norm, lots of people have very different realities. Every single member of my family has died before 72. All grandparents, aunts, uncles and parents. The absolute oldest was 71. 80% of them died of a cancer of some sort. So while in theory I COULD live to 85, I’m not expecting it in the slightest. So like hell will I still be working at 68 or whatever.

Good on you really do admire folk who save for their retirement from such a young age.
You enjoy your retirement.

I'm so sorry.

HRTFT but I feel quite often that if I did all the things I want to do (including sleeping as much as I would like) I wouldn’t have time to go to work. I’m in the fortunate position of loving the different aspects of my working life, but for sure th element of having to do some things means I don’t get to do other things (the more creative things) because there isn’t enough time.

I certainly don’t think I would be bored or boring if I stopped working.

@Bournetilly Three of my friends had died by the time I reached 54, I had known two since school. One was my closest friend from the age of 12 who was a nurse practitioner in a walk in centre, we had gone to an open day together when 16 about nursing. Giggled about boys and got told off together at school. We lived our childhood dream together though I did leave the NHS mid twenties and change careers. That was the moment I thought I’m going so I left at 54. I had already lived through my DD dying and was jaded by life, One of DH friends died when they were 38 and she left two very young children and a devastated DH. It’s very crystallising and sharpens the mind as to what really matters.

I think I'll have a year or two of not doing much when I retire, time to decompress after decades of having to be at work at certain times. I liked pottering around during furlough and felt mentally recharged because not much was expected of me during that time. Just because your friends aren't doing much now, doesn't mean they won't travel, volunteer, etc at some point in the next 30 years.

Exactly this.

I don’t mind doing some work but it is the 9 to 6pm every day and the limited holidays I don’t like. Basically would be good to have a bit more freedom.

Have you thought about HRT that sounds like a huge reduction in exercise and energy.

Not sure my circle will be retiring at 55, I’m in my 40’s and have a few friends in their 50’s who certainly won’t be retiring anytime soon, simply because they cannot afford to…
I think it comes down to the job you do, I have quite a physically demanding job, I wouldn’t want to do it until I was 65- 70 and I doubt I could. I have family members in trades, after 30 years on building sites, crawling through cavities etc I doubt they want to continue for longer then they have to either.
My Dad retired in his mid 60’s, now in his mid 70’s, he’s not a traveller but is always busy. DIY, gardening and helping his older siblings with jobs or his children that need him to help with projects etc
He started as an apprentice at 15 and worked all the way through until he retired. His world may seem small to you but he’s a really interesting, knowledgeable person who people certainly enjoy spending time with.

Just be you think their lives are meaningless, pointless, boring it doesn't follow that is the case. I retired early brc8i had enough of being shouted at by customers , doing a stressful job where I couldn't find answers for everybody, and working hard but not touching the sides of the work. And then having members of the public telling me that I was doing nothing all day. Now retired, I have some days when I'm busy, some when I'm not. I can read a book for hours if I want, yes, I potter in the garden, take myself off to a local attraction if I want, I can decide on the day what I want to do. And I also care for my 2 disabled children. Don't judge other people's retirement by your standards. Lots of us are making up for lost time.

Yes. On all the HRT, highest oestrogen, ferritin over 100, b12 is fine.

I've just had a ton of injuries incl. Achilles insertional tendinitis and now brutal bone spurs and plantar fascitis, plus prolapse surgeries, which have failed and left me in a worse state. Hence I had to stop running and can't get on a bike ever 😂

Menopause wrecked me early before I even realised what it was.

I retired at 60 last year but I started to dislike my job and sitting all day was giving me health issues. I love the freedom, the extra time and I'm now doing loads of exercise and I'm a stone lighter. If I had loved my job maybe I would have worked on or gone part time but I've no regrets.

Really not trying to be ruse OP but do you actually know how to relax and have fun?

Everything you list that you do is either a responsibility or achievement that you've worked for so how do you like to switch off? Do you ever switch off? Finding yourself outside of the path life puts you on is a skill that takes work. Maybe your friends could be more purposeful, sure, but equally they may be adjusting and resting before focusing their energy.

I have some friends that, when i ask them how they are, talk to me about the detail of their jobs and their working relationships, and others who talk to me about their latest trips out, craft projects, plans for the house and garden, tell funny stories, host bbqs. I definitely prefer the latter but if that isn't your vibe then by all means keep going.

Life doesn't have to mean being purposeful to offer contentment.