Why are baby groups not centred around the mother’s interests?

PTSDBarbiegirl · 14/04/2026 17:56

Start one! Sounds good 👍

RainReignRein · 14/04/2026 17:59

I would have a good look around locally as those definitely exist here. There's lots of exercise ones, singing groups that you can take your baby too (rather than the singing being for the baby), there are comedy shows you can take a baby along to, cinema, I'm sure I've seen a book club. Hopefully you'll find some in your area.

Original poster

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 18:00

RainReignRein · 14/04/2026 17:59

I would have a good look around locally as those definitely exist here. There's lots of exercise ones, singing groups that you can take your baby too (rather than the singing being for the baby), there are comedy shows you can take a baby along to, cinema, I'm sure I've seen a book club. Hopefully you'll find some in your area.

there was not really any local ones but maybe there will be a few in a years time which would be nice

OP posts:

Allswellthatendswelll · 14/04/2026 18:00

I went to a bring your baby exercise class and bring your baby choir and I enjoyed them far more than baby sensory! Also baby cinema.

Original poster

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 18:01

Allswellthatendswelll · 14/04/2026 18:00

I went to a bring your baby exercise class and bring your baby choir and I enjoyed them far more than baby sensory! Also baby cinema.

Edited

that’s what i do think so i just wondered why if it is for the mother these are not the norm but you have to really look around and be lucky to have a local one

OP posts:

mindutopia · 14/04/2026 18:03

I never went to baby sensory or any of that. I did a baby yoga class, which was yoga with babies laying on mats with toys. And my NCT group was a walk and a coffee. There are other exercise classes too.

TwilightAb · 14/04/2026 18:05

Allswellthatendswelll · 14/04/2026 18:00

I went to a bring your baby exercise class and bring your baby choir and I enjoyed them far more than baby sensory! Also baby cinema.

Edited

I loved going to the cinema to the baby friendly screenings when my ds was a baby. He had a feed and would then pretty much just sleep throughout the film. I couldn't do that with my first born though dd as I dont think she would have been able to quietly sleep throughout.

Original poster

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 18:06

TwilightAb · 14/04/2026 18:05

I loved going to the cinema to the baby friendly screenings when my ds was a baby. He had a feed and would then pretty much just sleep throughout the film. I couldn't do that with my first born though dd as I dont think she would have been able to quietly sleep throughout.

Show quote history

i wished so much to go to a baby cinema with DS unfortunately with DS it would have been impossible

OP posts:

Kingdomofsleep · 14/04/2026 18:07

Round here there are mother and baby pub quizzes (in the daytime) and cinema screenings. I much preferred stuff like that to the "sing and romp" type ones which just made me feel more depressed.

I used to get that thing where I slightly dissociated and the singing sounded like it was underwater. "The wheels on the bus..." awful. But I'm glad they work for other mums.

soupycustard · 14/04/2026 18:07

That's such a great idea! 17 years too late for me!

Kingdomofsleep · 14/04/2026 18:09

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 18:06

i wished so much to go to a baby cinema with DS unfortunately with DS it would have been impossible

Show quote history

Ah everyone has zero expectations honestly you should try it.

I went with dd when she was about 10 months and it was Love Actually, which I realised is hilariously sexist. At a quiet moment she let out the loudest most resounding fart and the whole screen laughed more at that than any of the supposedly funny scenes.

Baby cinema was so much fun.

GumballsAndGobstoppers · 14/04/2026 18:13

Such a great suggestion! I'd join!

Don't worry. No-one minds if your baby screams in baby cinema. It's all v relaxed.

LughLongArm · 14/04/2026 18:15

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 17:54

Recently because me and DH are thinking of a second child i have started to think if I would go to baby groups this time around. I did really struggle to enjoy them with DS now almost 2 as a) he was a very highly strung fussy baby so actually enjoying the group was difficult and b) i guess i was lucky that DH was at home so i did have adult company.

I did think would I do it for baby 2 if baby 2 is easier. Now in all honesty my answer is leaning towards no. The groups that we had I was doing the sensory stuff and songs at home anyways and until 1 babies are fairly oblivious to each other etc so for the baby there is not so much of a benefit which is why most people say it is for the mothers. Which is great at the same time it’s then I would still be reluctant to go as to why is it assumed i would bond with someone just because our babies are around the same age which got me wondering why are the baby groups not more centred around the mother’s interests. Like a book and baby group, walk and baby group, art and baby group etc.

I don’t think anyone’s assuming you will bond with anyone, only that someone else with a small baby isn’t going to judge you for having sick on your shoulder and forgetting your own name. I remember lots of exercise classes with pushchairs and baby yoga when I had DS. I assume the reason book and baby groups aren’t common is that most new mothers’ concentration is too shot, and that an art class would be frustrating because babies are fractious and you’d keep getting interrupted the moment you picked up a brush.

Original poster

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 18:53

LughLongArm · 14/04/2026 18:15

I don’t think anyone’s assuming you will bond with anyone, only that someone else with a small baby isn’t going to judge you for having sick on your shoulder and forgetting your own name. I remember lots of exercise classes with pushchairs and baby yoga when I had DS. I assume the reason book and baby groups aren’t common is that most new mothers’ concentration is too shot, and that an art class would be frustrating because babies are fractious and you’d keep getting interrupted the moment you picked up a brush.

Show quote history

I agree some hobbies would be tricky but art museum visits, or maybe at least so the mothers could talk about the hobby even if physically doing it is hard. It would be of more benefit then sitting in a circle singing wind the bobbin up for the nth time.

OP posts:

Kingdomofsleep · 14/04/2026 19:02

Near me there are also baby buggy walks where everyone walks around the (large and pleasant) graveyard together. I actually wish I did that one when dc1 was little but I was too shy...! Never been shy before or since but that was in lockdown and I had PPD.

if you tell us approximately where you live op, we might help you find what there is available.

firstofallimadelight · 14/04/2026 19:04

i preferred the playgroups where kids played independently and parents could sit and chat with a cuppa more than the sensory ones where we play 1:1 as I did a lot of that at home.
id love a book club or choir. There’s yoga and baby where I live

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/04/2026 19:05

Often with first babies, the most important thing in your life is having a new baby, and people bond over having babies the same age. I met (and made friends with) new mums age 23 to 40 with DS as a baby.

I did also got to a “Mummy and Me” Pilates class. I don’t think there was a single moment where there were no babies needing changing, feeding comforting… most several babies needing several of those things.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/04/2026 19:06

Actually, back in the glorious days of Surestart, I went to a craft group and a first aid course, where they put on a crèche.

They also ran buggy walks.

canklesmctacotits · 14/04/2026 19:06

Isn't that what NCT groups are intended for?

HettyMeg · 14/04/2026 19:07

There was a mums' fitness group near me where you could wear the baby while exercising - I just never felt up to it. I agree this sounds like a great idea though - the first baby class I went to was awful. Everyone just left straightaway after and didn't chat - it was pointless.

ANiceCuppaTeaandBiscuit · 14/04/2026 19:13

Our local pub runs a regular mum and baby wine tasting in the afternoon. A local cafe does a monthly ticketed mum and baby coffee morning and the local cinema has plenty of baby club screenings. They were great. There should definitely be more for mums.

OldHattie · 14/04/2026 19:17

There were a few when mine were tiny - the everyman cinema baby sessions, a church service for mums where the kids were there but it was mainly for mums, yoga classes where you took your baby. I agree these make a bit more sense than classes for babies, but those are maybe more for spending time with your baby rather than just doing something while they are there

Original poster

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 19:19

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/04/2026 19:05

Often with first babies, the most important thing in your life is having a new baby, and people bond over having babies the same age. I met (and made friends with) new mums age 23 to 40 with DS as a baby.

I did also got to a “Mummy and Me” Pilates class. I don’t think there was a single moment where there were no babies needing changing, feeding comforting… most several babies needing several of those things.

At the risk of this sounding like an online dating profile I am 38 going on 39 in september. I am near Leeds but can also get to Bradford or Ilkley. I like books, animes, cozy games, and am fluent in both german and mandarin on top of english 🤣😂🤣.

OP posts:

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 14/04/2026 19:21

motherofakoalaboy · 14/04/2026 19:19

At the risk of this sounding like an online dating profile I am 38 going on 39 in september. I am near Leeds but can also get to Bradford or Ilkley. I like books, animes, cozy games, and am fluent in both german and mandarin on top of english 🤣😂🤣.

Show quote history

17 years ago we could have been buddies, but you definitely don’t want to hang out with my stinky DS now.

Velvian · 14/04/2026 19:22

My favourite one was a stay and play at the community centre. They did a song at the start and end, but the rest of the time there were toys out and you could just sit and chat.

I took DD from quite a small baby and just sat feeding or holding her and chatting. I met my best friend there.