Relationship with ex has turned into a FWB / casual sex type of thing

[EpicLeWin]

I need some advice and no judgement please like on a previous thread of mine purely about our ages

I started dating my ex at 15, we had DD(3) at 17 and we also have a just turned 1 year old.

We split before I found our I was pregnant with youngest because he wanted said he thought he was bisexual and wanted to experiment with men, while it was hard we remained friends and when I found out I was pregnant he was supportive.

I have no family support really it's just him and his dad and stepmom, I'm still toll
Living where we were living previously and he's living back with his dad but he comes over regularly etc We don't have a fixed schedule it's just anytime really not a proper routine and it works

Over xmas I went with him to go and stay with his mum and her side of the family, it was nice for the dc to see other family too but we ended up sleeping together. I had the MAP and we agreed it was a mistake

However it’s turned into casual sex / fwb type thing and we do have sex often if he stays over for example (he stays over if one of the dc have been ill to help me as i can’t go to borh if they’re crying for example)

i do love him of course but i’m not chasing to get back with him or anything if he doesn’t want to but i don’t know what’s best

I don’t feel i have anyone i can talk to irl

Why are you even entertaining this loser?

I wouldn’t with my ex. I’ve walked the walk with him, and no more. 😳

Get an sti test.

We split before I found out I was pregnant with my youngest but I couldnt have a termination. It was a contraception failure I was on the nexplanon implant

We can't agree on a proper schedule due to his work it's different every week and he works most weekends but he does take them to the park and spends time with them / does bedtime etc. When he doing bedtime I do occasionally go out and do the food shop but it's hard to just go out as our baby doesn't settle, he only turned 1 last week and he is still BF to sleep and he takes a while so I wouldn't want to go further than the food shop and he can't afford to find his own place

I don't plan on meeting anyone else because I don't want to introduce anyone to the dc

It's a bit unfair saying he's not committed to the children (some replies, not the OP). He sees them a lot, stays over when they are sick...who really wants to stay and mind sick children when they don't have to.

Are you happy with it, OP? Do you want to get back with him?

I hope the protection is condoms along with other birth control, you don't know what he is doing the rest of the time.

My ex left nearly 30 years ago, we had three kids at primary school. He seldom had them to his new home at first, because it was awkward with his (then) girlfriend, so he’d come here for a few hours. And sometimes we had sex, and I’d think at least when he’s in my bed I know he’s not in hers.

Much later, when divorce negotiations were at a low point, he said he’d only carried on sleeping with me out of pity. It was probably the cruellest thing he ever said.

Don’t make someone a priority when they only see you as an option. You deserve so much better.

Great advice above. Stop the casual sex. Draw a line. Move forward without him. He’s not for you. And he’s also a walking sexual health hazard if he’s sleeping around. I hope at least you’re using condoms.