Cousin had stopped speaking to me after potentially being outed as gay?

[concernedlass]

Me and my cousin are quite close, we have always been there for each other and our parents are extremely close as well.

Over the bank holiday weekend I had heard through the grapevine that he had been sleeping with and old school friend.

Everyone in our town has been gossiping about it.

I text my cousin asking him if he was OK and then relayed to him what I had heard.

He was quite abrupt in his reply which was "I am not interested in these silly things" and then stopped texting me back.

I do remember many years ago as a teen that he had confided in me about kissing another boy etc but I just thought he was messing around.

He hasn't been online since then (WhatsApp).

I am a bit worried about him and just want to support him.

It probably would have been better to phrase it as "i heard you were dating ---, not sure if its true as you havent mentioned it but itd be lovely to all go for a meal some time if you are, I havent seen him in years' rather than making it sound like some scandal.

It's her COUSIN!

I swear this place is getting worse.

COUSIN!

No wonder he’s depressed with family like you lot.

So he's 46?
Surely he's worked out if he's gay by now?

Update.
I saw him earlier this morning and he insisted that he was not gay.
He said it was all just none sense etc.

I asked him about what he had told me when we were teens and he said he was experimenting and that was that.

He thanked me for my concern.

Amazing you can’t see the damage you’ve caused with your faux concern.

I imagine he will be blocking you right about now.

Can't believe you questioned him again when he clearly doesn't want to talk about it.

Well, nor can you, tbf.

Is he the only gay in the village? This has to be a ridiculous post.

I'm not sure why you'd bring up the conversation of his sexuality when he clearly doesn't want to discuss it .

Why are you dragging up teenage conversations?

Love him.

Be a friend.

Leave him be.

Dragging up a conversation you had 30 years ago (when you were teenagers) means that you're both middle-aged now.

He must have had relationships before now! In thirty years!

Not sure what damage I’m causing by calling OP out on her blatant homophobia. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Poor bloke
this is such a sad scenario
he must be middle aged now?
can he move to, idk, Manchester, and start living his life?

I’d be willing to contribute to a crowd funder for his train ticket.

Well she will jusr have to deal with it, its 2026 ,Somebody beibg gay shouldnt be a big deal nor should they have to hide it.

Not whole towns though.

Did you make it completely clear to him that you couldn't care less whether he's gay or not and that you love him whatever? I'm not really getting that impression.

No doubt he's absolutely terrified of his mum finding out. Poor bloke I can't imagine how hard it much be for him with a homophobic mum.

Telling someone that everyone is gossiping about their sex life isn't "checking in", it's pointlessly upsetting. What did you hope to achieve by doing that?