AIBU to stop my children wasting food at the holiday buffet?

[constantnc]

To not let my kids waste holiday AI food?

At home our food waste is minimal, I serve a portion onto plates and seconds is always available.

For the first time on holiday I have let my kids ages 9+ go around the buffet and serve themselves.

I am not happy with the waste, ie the 1 bite and I dont like it, and lots of what they will like then full up.

Unsure whether to reduce independence and serve what they will like and eat, or let them get on with it. Most families seem to have no problem piling the plates and leaving half of it.

(We use AI so i get respite from cooking cleaning so dont want to swap from AI).

Personally, I would find food waste distressing - home or elsewhere the principle doesn't change. I would ask them to try everything they fancied - but take very small portions, and then seconds if they like it.

Do you know what happens all the food left after a buffet? It’s binned so you curtailing your children’s food at it is wasting more food.

It sounds like you ration /strictly control portion sizes at meal times at home to avoid waste. This is admirable, however, does have consequences.

This is probably the first time your DC have had portion size freedom. They will get some things wrong and get too much - this is normal, particularly with their upbringing

Your DC need to learn portion sizes for themselves. They also need to know that occasionally it is ok to leave food if they are full. You eating the bread just to prove you shouldn't leave waste at an AI is not being a great role model.

I have very fussy eaters in my household, I love AI buffets as it gives my DC a chance to try new things in a relaxed environment

Please relax and see this as a learning experience for your DC

The age of children has no bearing on whether they need supervision or not. It comes down to whether they know how to behave or not.

We go for in the middle - don't choose what they put on their plates but will be nearby to remind them to take a small amount and they can always come back for more.
It also stops them eating cakes/donuts/chips for breakfast which I still have no idea why they put them out in the morning and we have stayed a 4 and 5* hotels!

We also go AI for the same reason and found it more expensive to do bed and breakfast then eating out.

Do you think taking too much food, or leaving too much food is bad behaviour?

They behave well in getting food, queue nicely, dont touch without utensils etc.

Seriously your DC sound great. Just a little overexcited at a buffet which has happened to the best of us. A few instructions maybe but other than let them learn.

I do get what your saying OP, i also hate food waste

I just remind my kids when they go up there is an infinite amount of food so they dont need to panic.

And if they leave alot ill remind them thats why when they are trying something to just take a little etc

But even as adults we will do it sometimes, ive had some stuff left over or taken something and not liked it so i am more relaxed with it on holiday.

it also does occur to me that if someone HATES food waste, then supporting AI holidays is not a wonderfully ethical life choice?

YANBU etiquette dictates that if you help yourself to food then you eat it - otherwise why take it?

However, they are children and need to learn. Encourage them to try a small portion of something if they dont know whether they like it or not and if they do then they can always have some more can't they? And if they don't like it only a minimal amount has been wasted.

I would really really dislike plates piled high and loads left. But it sounds like they're not doing that, so I would just gently comment "remember not to take more than you want" every time this happens. And praise them when they get it right.

Indeed. I think either stop worrying about it or stop supporting it really. The food will be thrown away by the dumpster load, whatever your children do or don’t do.

My kids used to love the doughnuts and cake at hotel buffets. Never happened at home! Just like the woman I saw at our (exorbitant) hotel in Brazil who had a black coffee and a glass of prosecco for breakfast...

At a youth hostel in Budapest I once saw a Chinese pre-teen enthusiastically eating a doughnut on a fork, dipping it into tomato ketchup.

I don't think it's bad behaviour. I think it's learning how to behave. They do something; your reaction helps them to understand what is appropriate in the future.

I absolutely hate food waste but that doesn’t mean they need to clear their plates every time.

Just encourage them to take less and go up for 2nds or 3rds.

Try not to be too restrictive but explain that it’s not going anywhere and they can keep going up.
I think our palate changes once we start eating and so you night fancy something a bit different or more of the same thing once you’re not as hungry.

If they want strawberries, take 3.
Take smaller amounts of the other things too.
Then they can just go back up.

I have never done AI but I do think people probably do go a bit silly at first but then calm down when they know it’s not going anywhere.
So I wouldn’t get stressed out over it.

If you find the waste distressing then I think AI or to be honest any resort with a buffet would be the wrong holiday choice for you.

Spot on! I rarely do AI for that reason. Given the state of the planet (which I'm always surprised never feature in these MN discussions), all these choices that privilege choice and self-indulgence over care and consideration for the planet (and others on it) do upset me. However, I have been on one AI holiday recently, and my DC chose what he wanted to eat and went back for seconds if he liked it, as did I. This isn't just about whether there is wastage at the resort, to me it is also about the principle/ethics of care that you are teaching your children.

If they are taking too much food they need supervision. I wouldn't get too upset about some wasted bread and butter though.

Im not a fan of food waste, but i am surprised at someone so bothered to the point of considering chaperoning their children's strawberry selecting choosing to go AI.

I think id remind them not to forget they can go back up, so why not put just one of everything on the plate so they have room for lots of things to try at once. But I wouldnt turn an AI holiday buffet into an opportunity for a sustainability lesson. Id agree you do need to unclench a little.

I totally agree with this. The best thing you can do for your children is let them serve themselves with guidance from a young age. It allows them to work out for themselves how to serve to their appetite.
You don't want them trying to learn this skill laster in life, when we are less attuned to our natural hunger.

Well you don’t like food waste, so clearly it’s a behaviour you aren’t happy with.

Shoving down bread and butter you don’t really want is just as wasteful as binning it IMO.

@MyballsareSandy2015 Yup, I was coming on to say exactly that. I have never been in sympathy with the view that you have to clear your plate even if you are completely full otherwise the food is wasted. That's just treating yourself like a human dustbin.

Having said that I can see where the OP is coming from in not wanting her DC to take things they won't eat. However, I think this is probably just a learning curve they need to get over. At 9+ they really should be allowed to serve themselves IMO and if they are getting it a bit wrong at the moment it's probably because they are not used to it yet.

I think you should relax. It's all new and exciting for them. They are learning how their appetite works .
Yes there will be waste but that's better than making them eat everything on their plates.
Encourage them to only take a bit and then go back for more if they want it but I don't think you should worry about it.
There is bound to be waste at all inclusive buffets anyway

I agree with other they you don't have to clear your plates or eat the bread because it is there, just help them not pick to much.

Its a good opportunity for them to try new foods let them