AIBU to stop my children wasting food at the holiday buffet?

[constantnc]

To not let my kids waste holiday AI food?

At home our food waste is minimal, I serve a portion onto plates and seconds is always available.

For the first time on holiday I have let my kids ages 9+ go around the buffet and serve themselves.

I am not happy with the waste, ie the 1 bite and I dont like it, and lots of what they will like then full up.

Unsure whether to reduce independence and serve what they will like and eat, or let them get on with it. Most families seem to have no problem piling the plates and leaving half of it.

(We use AI so i get respite from cooking cleaning so dont want to swap from AI).

It's a skill they may need more supervision to learn. As a pp said, find the middle ground. So today with the strawberries, they take a couple initially, not ten.

But it is difficult on holiday, because even things they usually like will often taste different.

Honestly just relax abit. The food thats left behind in the pans is wasted. There's alot of food waste in buffets. They're learning new foods. They're learning how to serve themselves. A reminder that if you dont know if you're going to like it to just get a small piece. But even things you do like dont taste the same abroad. I've got a big bowl of something I like and tucked in and its just not nice.

Honestly I think its a sign that when you get home restructure your meal times so they serve themselves more often and learn how much they eat.

But dont ruin everyone's holiday getting annoyed at the buffet 3 times a day.

Depends on their age I guess but mine are told that they are expected to eat the things they take unless they really dislike it. They should not take too much as they can always go back. It's been from age five or six onwards. Any younger and if be putting the food on their plate and carrying it anyway so what they were choosing could be discussed.

Do they do this at parties and buffets in general? My kids are really good at regulating their appetites and never seem to take more than they can eat. They are much better at this than I am. I wonder if it was because they were breastfed on demand? Anyway, I think some people are better than others at judging what they can eat. You'll have to encourage them to take small amounts and go back if necessary, rather than overloading.

I think you should go round with them, i know you are on holiday but buffets are too tempting to pick food up just because. There is no point in letting them help themselves if they are going to waste food.

Shoving down bread and butter you don’t really want is just as wasteful as binning it IMO.

Id just encourage them to take smaller portions and return if they like something.

No one’s mentioned the annoyance to other guests of little children serving themselves everything, umming and ahhing, dashing back and forth, possibly mixing up serving spoons and dropping food.

I understand parents want to use the buffet as a ‘teaching moment’, but it does affect other holiday makers. At least these children will be quick. It’s the one’s overseen by parents who are causing delay by constantly asking them what they want….

Buffets of this kind are inherently wasteful anyway, with businesses expecting high volumes of uneaten food and factoring that in.

Studies have shown that commercial buffets involve more than twice as much wastage as plated foods.

All of that. They've had no practice whatsoever on serving themselves and leaning how to get it right, so of course, faced with a buffet, they can't cope.

I have a relative who plates up food rather than allowing me to take what I need. I absolutely hate it, and end up wasting more because I've been given portions that don't suit me.

My children served themselves from communal serving bowls as soon as they were physically capable of doing so. They learned about leaving enough for everyone else, and in the early days we'd discuss how much they would have room for, and mention coming back for more if they finished

Its early in the season, the resort is quiet, and them faffing at the buffet isn't affecting anyone. Its why at 9+ i've said go help yourselves while i have a sit down.
Its the first time for this freedom....
The grown ups pushing in before them however 🙄

Edited to say mon-fri at home i serve onto plates.
The weekend is more of a in the middle help yourself which has always worked well, only the odd occasion of took too much and now i'm full. So its not new to them, just new for a holiday buffet....

Taking more of something than you know you’ll eat is greedy and ill mannered so that lesson needs to be delivered effectively so it doesn’t fall on deaf ears. They obviously still need supervision until they learn.

We use AI so i get respite from cooking cleaning so dont want to swap from AI

Hotel bed and breakfast and out for dinner in local restaurants still gives the same respite from cooking and cleaning and has the added advantage of better food and supporting the local economy.

I mean it’s going to get wasted whether it’s on their plates or stays in the buffet trays. Most AI food gets chucked out after every meal (unless you’ve gone super budget, in which case the same food will probably be recycled for every meal time!) It’s these AI buffets that are the problem, not leaving food on the plate. However I agree that it’s not a good lesson to teach your kids. I’d tell them to take a tiny bit of what they fancy so they can try it to make sure they like it before getting more

I think it’s time to let them serve themselves at home so they can learn portioning. But honestly, if you’ve chosen to holiday at an AI resort, it’s just this sort of thing isn’t it? If you’re going to do it you might as well enjoy it. Definitely remind them they can go twice and there’s always more and not to be greedy and inconsiderate, but a handful of strawberries isn’t a massive thing when you think about the amount of food they’ll throw away every day at any buffet restaurant.

YANBU.

Mine are only toddlers and I tell them not to take things unless they are going to at least try to eat it.

They can always go back for more if hungry.

I agree the level of waste is awful.

This. If you have always controlled their portions then they have never learned to do it themselves. Honestly I think you could see this as an ideal opportunity for them to learn. You won't decrease food waste at that hotel on your holiday by controlling their portions there. You can model how to choose a portion you will eat and going back several times and you can model taking a small portion of something to try. Maybe you should have done this when they were younger?

“Hotel bed and breakfast and out for dinner in local restaurants still gives the same respite from cooking and cleaning and has the added advantage of better food and supporting the local economy” …..

genius id never thought of that 🤔

The OP says she wants AI

This is one of the reasons I don’t really like AI buffets. So much waste. But often the food looks better than it tastes, so I’ve done it myself - taken one bite and thought ‘nope’ and gone back for something else.

Kids love it though. The freedom to choose, going up and down, the extravagant layout. Let them enjoy this, but talk to them about waste. Teach them to be realistic about the quantity they will actually eat. Then sit back and relax and enjoy your holiday.

@constantnc Just tell them it's rude to take lots or food you're not going to eat, so if they haven't had something before then just take a small amount to try it first then they can always get more.

I would try to encourage them to try new things but not to take too much at once. Inevitably their eyes will be bigger than their bellies when faced with a new and exciting selection of food though. That's if they aren't fazed by the choice and newness, some kids are. Don't expect them at 9 to be better than the average 49 year old. Adults get a bit excited about buffets too.

I’d say if you’re really concerned about food waste, AI was the wrong way to go. There must be TONNES of wastage there. You are trying to kid yourself that you aren’t contributing to that if you eat everything you select but that’s like green washing or something as the hotel will have had to cater so that everyone in that hotel, including your family, has a choice of all items, and that will inevitably generate a load of waste.

DD was always allowed to serve herself at home, even in nursery they encouraged the older ones. So a AI buffet was not that big thing, it was more the idea of so many new things.

I hate the pilled up plates, food just gets cold, stuff mixes which shouldn't mix.

We always went several times, starter and a plate with bread and butter to share, then when all had eaten, we would go for mains.
If DD wanted to try something new, she would take one or two bites of food and sometimes went and got more if she liked it.

I leave food if I don't like it and she has the same freedom.

Dessert and a shared platter with fruit when all had eaten their main course.

It would make me feel bad, too. There are so many kids starving on this planet and the waste makes me feel uncomfortable.
Tell them to take only a little bit of the new food so that they can check if they like it or not. My kids did it when they were smaller in the past and I simply tried to finish what they've left. However, at 9 they should not be allowed to waste so much.

Kids and adults alike often take far too much at buffets, so it's not something children seem to grow out of if they're not taught! I tell my DC that they never know if they're going to like the food they take even if it's something they usually eat, because it might be cooked differently, it's been sitting around etc. So they always take small helpings initially and have seconds if they like it.

Might not be piled high but one bite and leaving it.

Just because you can doesn't mean you should

If they genuinely don't like it that's fine but encourage them to think about choices, first time serving themselves needs supervision - how do they know what not to do or what items are/if they'd like it etc.

Take them when you get your own food. They can go back for seconds or pudding on their own and you can chill then.

What do you think happens to the uneaten food at the end of the night?