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Overspending please help

158 replies

SunConure · 08/04/2026 14:48

To be losing £500 per month. I am overspending by about £500 every month and I need some help to get it under control.
£1100 mortgage + council tax + electric gas etc
£110 phones for me and dc (in contract! )
£500 food (I am addressing this - joined a larder!)
£360 medical bills
£280 cleaner
£200 utilities on holiday home (no mortgage)

£200 travel to work
£100 pet insurance (high b/c of past claim)
£100 dc pocket money and activities
£200 loan repayments
£100 car
£2-300 on general living

OP posts:
persisted · 08/04/2026 15:33

If you are being laid off there are several things here that can go as soon as that happens.
£200 travel will no longer be needed.
Cancel the cleaner and do your own, or at least reduce it. Plenty of us work full time and do it, and DS is 15 - about time he was pulling his weight.

If you havn't done so already you need to explain to him that things are going to change and he can't be expecting expensive stuff. He wants fancy new clothes/trainers they are a birthday or christmas present.

oldmanandtheangel · 08/04/2026 15:33

Sorry Lydia got there first!

hahabahbag · 08/04/2026 15:35

Halve your shopping bill, some sacrifices but very doable, reduce your cleaning costs by either doing it all yourself of switch to fortnightly, reduce those odds and ends.

Bjorkdidit · 08/04/2026 15:35

OP have a look at:

Do a money makeover and potentially save £1,000s - Money Saving Expert

A systematic run through in cutting all your bills/spending.

You haven't mentioned broadband, TV licence or any subscriptions/TV services. Do you have any of these? If not in contract, you can cut the cost of these or cancel if not needed.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 08/04/2026 15:35

SunConure · 08/04/2026 15:05

I know but I have got myself in a mess I used to have a high pay job but getting laid off

Missed this but ok you don’t need the cleaner when not working.

Monty36 · 08/04/2026 15:36

I notice you shop at Waitrose.

Try a different store. But write a list. And price that list out online before you go.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 08/04/2026 15:36

SunConure · 08/04/2026 15:15

General living is things like clothes, restaurants, decorating the house, holidays

You might need the odd thing for the house, but I’d cut restaurants early on. Not needed. And clothes can come from Vinted - or at least mine do!

Holidays can be cut if you have a holiday house surely? Except travel to get to it.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 08/04/2026 15:37

And no Waitrose- Waitrose is bonkers prices

vickylou78 · 08/04/2026 15:37

Phone bill sounds very high. My contract is £11 and my daughter £5 a month and we both have unlimited texts decent amount of data etc.

Cleaner - clean the house yourself

Holiday home?

Food bill could definitely be reduced that's high.

momager22 · 08/04/2026 15:37

Can you cut the cleaner down to fortnightly ? Give the kids jobs like one cleans the bathroom once a week and once hoovers the lounge ?
You really shouldn’t need a community larder just go to Lidl/ Aldi instead of Waitrose. Buy their own brand stuff.

Buttercuphey · 08/04/2026 15:37

Hey I find sinking funds help me budget for Christmas, birthdays, kids clothes, car maintenance etc. I put a little in each month.
I would love a cleaner, I also work full time. Maybe time in the future.

I buy phones outright and have a sim only card, I currently pay £8 per month for my sim only. I also have a second hand car which I bought outright so no finance

Where do you buy your food. Do you buy mostly branded items? Could you change to aldi or Lidl? You could probably easily get this down

Good luck with renting your home in France, this would definitely help a lot x

pottylolly · 08/04/2026 15:38

SunConure · 08/04/2026 14:48

To be losing £500 per month. I am overspending by about £500 every month and I need some help to get it under control.
£1100 mortgage + council tax + electric gas etc
£110 phones for me and dc (in contract! )
£500 food (I am addressing this - joined a larder!)
£360 medical bills
£280 cleaner
£200 utilities on holiday home (no mortgage)

£200 travel to work
£100 pet insurance (high b/c of past claim)
£100 dc pocket money and activities
£200 loan repayments
£100 car
£2-300 on general living

If I were in your position I’d probably try to get the PTSD therapy in France. It’s often a lot cheaper there even privately.

I view the cleaner as an investment in yourself. If you have MH issues don’t cancel this unless it’s the last resort.

The glaring one is the £500 food bill. I would try to half that. And I’d also try and shop around for the loan and utilities.

Twooclockrock · 08/04/2026 15:41

Cleaner, i dont have a cleaner and i earn over 100k and work full time with 2 dcs.
Holiday home should be rented out at least to cover those costs or sold
Phones, i have had the same phone for 5 years now and so have no handset costs, same for my children. Iphone 11 for them. Samsung a5 for me. Out phone bills are 20 quid each and thats with unlimited data.
Food seems a bit high for two people. Could definitely shave 100 quid here
Can you renegotiate your loan term at all?

Createausername1970 · 08/04/2026 15:42

Get rid of the cleaner.

Cut your food bill. We spend around £500 on 3 adults and we eat reasonably well. Suck it up for a few months and have cheaper options such as supermarket beans on toast. Not saying you live like this for ever, but you cut your cloth......

General living - stop buying clothes and going to restaurants.

Medical bills - only you know how helpful this is. Can you cut it back - reduce the number of sessions etc., even if you can't stop it.

Pet insurance - if you don't want to cancel, can you reduce the monthly cost by opting for a lower total payout or increased excess?

You have a lot of room for manoeuvre to be honest, apart from the holiday home.

IsItOverYetPlease · 08/04/2026 15:43

SunConure · 08/04/2026 15:15

General living is things like clothes, restaurants, decorating the house, holidays

You have a holiday house though?

I thought your DS bought his own clothes out of his £100 a month?!

How are you eating at restaurants and still spending £500 a month on food?!

Twooclockrock · 08/04/2026 15:45

Oh and the waitrose.. I used to live next to a big waitrose so I fell into the trap of always shopping there for everything. I was sinking around 1k a month on food shopping..
I then moved to near an iceland and a lidl and I can fill up a whole deep trolley for the same price as two small bags of shopping from waitrose. My food bill is now about 100 a week for a family of 4 and thats with loads of treats and fruit etc.

MajorProcrastination · 08/04/2026 15:45

The cleaner is a luxury I've never had. Not a necessity so that would be gone from my budget. At the very least, could you cut from weekly to fortnightly or once a month? But that feels like an easy £280.

The £100 for pocket money and activities for your child - how much is pocket money and how much is for the activities? I feel like these are two separate budget lines really, one you have control over and the other not so much. Do you receive Child Benefit?

The £110 on phones is a lot, when are the contracts up? I'd definitely look at a cheaper option for your son especially. I hate negotiating phone contracts.

The medical bills is a huge one too. I can see that it's not NHS and it's for PTSD, this I would make a priority to source via the NHS as it sounds like your personal financial situation has changed and paying out of pocket for this therapy is no longer affordable for you.

Most of us also don't have a holiday home but I've not gone straight to selling that as I wonder if that's actually a useful source of fairly passive income for you? Do you rent it out regularly? So you offset the costs with some income.

I can see you've already mentioned the need to address spend on food. Try seeing what you can do for a couple of months. Planning meals helps, batch cooking and freezing portioned meals helps, having a food food budget and reducing waste. No eating out, no take aways, making sure you use all leftovers. Does your son get free school meals? They came in the year after my youngest left primary so I've always had to pay for their dinners but that would make a huge difference to my food budget, well over £1k a year.

Pet insurance is tough. Ours is fairly high for our surviving dog. My parents don't have pet insurance because they can cover the costs if they come up, we can't. I see someone else suggested saving instead of using the insurance. If it's £100 a month that sounds like an option. You could save it instead of paying the insurance and have £1200 in a year then have that £100 back in your budget. Or cut saving to £50 and keep that budget line in there for longer but have £50 more wriggle room immediately. It's a gamble though.

Have a look on the Martin Lewis site for every single approach to looking at all of your utility bills.

Loan repayments, I assume these were agreed to when you had a higher income. Can you contact all of these about negotiating a lower monthly payment? You'll probably end up paying more over time but it'll give you the breathing space you need on a monthly basis.

What's the interest like on the repayments? Are you able to get a 0% credit card to move some things around, still maintain repayments but cut back that interest? I know it'll depend on lots of things but that's helped me to juggle card repayments in the past and get on top of things again.

Within your general living costs, I see you mention holidays. Have you changed the type of holiday you go on? We don't go abroad every year. Clothes wise too, are you using vinted to sell and buy? You've probably done all of this but just in case.

As Micawber says in David Copperfield: "Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery." - you've got to get that monthly balance right or things will spiral. Well done for asking for help, it's hard.

Viviennemary · 08/04/2026 15:48

Medical bills
Pet insurance
Cleaner
Holiday home expenses

Sounds like you can't afford a holiday home unless you rent it out.

Sensiblesal · 08/04/2026 15:49

SunConure · 08/04/2026 15:15

General living is things like clothes, restaurants, decorating the house, holidays

I can’t be anything other than blunt here. You can’t afford restaurants, holidays etc right now.

lose the cleaner.

is the food shop because you are buying ready made food?

it’s shit you lost your job, is it that you now have a lower paid one or are you on benefits/looking for a new one.

you need a budget that is within your means & you are going to have to be ruthless

Viviennemary · 08/04/2026 15:52

What about council tax on your holiday home.

LakieLady · 08/04/2026 15:54

I've never paid more than about £20 pm for a phone, so maybe go SIM only or look for something cheap and cheerful when your current contracts run out. That could save you a fair bit.

Pet insurance is a tricky one. I had pets (dogs and cats) for nearly 50 years and never had insurance for vet bills. I used to put a few quid a month in a savings account and there was always enough in there to cover any bills, and I'd award myself a dividend every few years. I concede I was pretty lucky in having healthy pets though.

Make the holiday home earn its keep by renting it out. Do your own cleaning, and as there's only 2 of you, you should easily be able to cut £200 a month from your food bill. Eat less meat, cook from scratch, buy own brands and shop at Aldi/Lidl.

The £360 a month for PTSD treatment is a lot. The most effective treatments for PTSD seem to be trauma-focussed CBT and EMDR, and my friend, who is a psychotherapist and does CBT for trauma, charges £60 per session. She reckons that in most cases it's resolved after 8-12 sessions, and that EMDR is often effective in even less. Hopefully, this expense may not be ongoing for much longer.

Check that you're getting the best possible deal on your utilities.

And I hate to say it, but "clothes, restaurants, decorating the house, holidays" are not "general living" expenses but luxuries. With the exception of school uniform and kids needing new clothes because the buggers will insist on growing, new clothes are rarely essential. Cut back and only buy what is essential.

You can't afford to eat in restaurants regularly, or decorate the house unless it's in a truly shocking state, and you shouldn't need to spend much on holidays when you have a house in France! And when you're not using it, rent it out so that you get an income from it. And if the cleaning cost is for your home, do your own housework!

FriedFalafels · 08/04/2026 15:54

As much as I love my cleaner, it’s a luxury. That will get you nearly 60% of the way there by scrapping it. If it’s just you and your son, improve your meal planning and that should near enough get you there

madosaurus · 08/04/2026 15:54

Plan your meals and only buy the stuff for those meals. If you don’t like cooking, batch cook or do double/triple quantities so you only cook a few times a week.

See if you can get cheaper utilities. As previous poster said, moneysavingexpert is a great site to get good deals. This includes getting paid to change your bank account.

Reduce any subscriptions you may have. If you don’t watch live television then cancel your tv licence.

How long do you have left on your loan repayment and phone contracts? What is the interest on your loan? Do you have any savings that you could to pay your loan? Eg makes sense to pay off a 10% interest loan if you’re only getting 3% on your savings.

Don’t get rid of your cleaner or your therapy as you need them for your mental wellbeing, but can you cut back a bit at least? So once a week/fortnight for your cleaner?

NailsForChristmas · 08/04/2026 15:57

Once the phone contracts are over, do not renew or get new phones. I pay less than £2 a month for my contract and buy a £100 phone every 3 years.

I agree with a few that (for me) a cleaner is a necessity if you're working FT and raising children, especially if you are mentally burned. But now you are getting laid off it may be worth pausing that until you're back in work. Once back in work, perhaps reduce to fortnightly. We have ours for 2 hours fortnightly, is £80 a month.

Do not shop at Waitrose. Aldi or Lidl will be cheaper.
I go to Waitrose occasionally to buy things they don't sell elsewhere and it costs me £30 a time and it is never a full bag. Yet I can get a week's worth of food shopping in Aldi for under £60 for 2 adults and a toddler.
For example, I made 12 large portions of (non-meat) shepherds pie at the weekend for under £3. You just have to rethink your cooking and recipes and look for lower cost substitutions. I use a lot of dried beans and lentils, along with vegetables, rice which I get in big bags from an Asian store, for example.

Can you look to get the medical support through the NHS? Helping your mental health is vital, but at least get on a waiting list so you won't be paying so much forever.

canisquaeso · 08/04/2026 15:57

Cut the cleaner, get out of the phone contracts, cut the pocket money, cut the general spending.