Update to AIBU to refuse Aunt's fwb claim on her estate.

[Sleepneededprettyplease]

Posting here because it is where I put the first thread.

A brief summery is that my Aunt died and her FWB is trying to say that he is entitled to part of her estate because she had asked me to allow him to stay in a house she had invested in for me. Anyway if you want the full story feel free to read what I put on the first thread.

Anyway the main thing is that he is now sueing in the courts. I need a bit of a hand hold please. My lawyers have suggested getting a barristers opinion so I am just waiting for that. I wouldn't even mind if it was possible to just go to mediation but he wants the house for the rest of his life and won't consider anything else.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5505433-aibu-to-refuse-aunts-fwb-claim-on-her-estate?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=share

Could you set up a GO fund me for legal help with this.

I think this is a massive headache waiting to happen. A friend of mine has just got a court order for evicting a tenant with thousands in rent arrears under Section 8. Tenant didn't move out by the date specified on the CO, so the next step is bailiffs with, apparently, a standard delay of 2-4 months before bailiffs will get moving on that - and the entire time the tenant is still there and still not paying rent.

You can put all the safeguards you like in the contract, but if he's gonna breach it, you'll still need the law, a judge, and a lot of money to enforce it and you're back to square one.

You should also keep in mind that if he's in his 80s with no assets, then even if you won either of these cases and got a costs order, he'd never be able to pay it, and if he died his estate wouldn't be able to either. This is probably his core motivation for doing all of this - there's no downside for him and all downside for you.

Late to the party as I have just lurked on this thread with my jaw on the floor.
I'm sure you will have looked at everything and covered all bases but did you ever check your household insurance for legal cover? It can be very helpful.

We unfortunately had a boundary dispute, our insurance covered everything, including an appeal. We won, we had to go down that route in order to be able to sell. Unfortunately after winning, we ended up selling at a substantial loss just to get away as winning didn't remove the unpleasant neighbours and it was necessary to protect my DH's mental health incase he flipped and battered the neighbour. (Slightly jesting on that one, but it did tip DH into depression).

@Sleepneededprettyplease another Lurker with thoughts… hopefully helpful

i know you want the house money for ivf but are you able to mortgage the house and get it that way? If so I would step back from the whole (very unfair) situation, get the money and leave the fwb to rot. He won’t last forever so eventually you will be able to gain possession and sell up.

sorry if this isn’t possible - I really feel for you.

Over 18s resident in a house that gets a 'normal' mortgage has to sign something to say that they do not have a claim on the house in the event that the mortgage-holders default on payments and the house is repossessed.

Presume it is different for BTL but don't know.

I don't think FWB would sign that.

Worth a conversation with solicitors tho

Why?

The house is the security for the mortgage provider. The mortgage provider needs to know they can access that security if payments default. They don’t want to be responsible for evicting an 80-something man if it comes to it.

OP would also need to demonstrate that mortgage payments were affordable and she doesn’t sound in the best financial situation to do that.

I so sorry this has ended up like this.

I think the idea of going to the papers is a good one. You could start a thread here asking how to do that - I bet someone would have some experience to share. It's the kind of thing that would make a good story.

The second house is worth a fraction of the main estate. Allowing that money to go to save this house would be daft. Estate is about 3x or more the value of this house.

Because you are ‘presuming’ things that a solicitor could actually clarify

So you can liquidate rest of the estate (to you/sister) and leave him in the second home until he dies. Get that money out? Just consider it like a deferred part of inheritance, like someone getting a house in trust but needing a girlfriend of deceased to move out or die.

Yes. 5 children, multiple siblings and cousins.

I won't consider a contract that doesn't end when he moves out for care or anything else.

I am speaking from my experience of remortgaging a house with an over-18 year old living in it.

I noted that I presumed it was different with BTL because I do not have experience of that. As there is no tenancy agreement with FWB, I don't think OP will be looking at this option.

If seeking further information, OP would be better speaking to a mortgage provider (for free) than to a solicitor (costly).

Unfortunately until it is settled accommodation must be equal.

That is the danger. His age makes people sympathetic.

The fact he is a CF who has sponged of women most of his life seems irrelevant.

Sadly no I can't. I would have to pay a fortune in costs.

It seems rather cheeky of me. Especially when going the full distance would be in the hundreds of thousands.

Very aware that he can't pay costs. I currently have a possession order so am keen that it stays valid.

I am aware that it could be major headaches but feel very trapped. I can't continue to fight and I don't think he will take a lump sum.

I did check house insurance. Weirdly I would be insured to challenge a will but not to defend one.

If I can just get a settlement then I can access the money from selling her main home. Atm it has to be held by me as executor under strict conditions.

Once we get out of court proceedings though I can distribute that money which will pay (and pay back) my IVF money.

You?

or the estate? -this case is about the estate and you are executor. You’d not need to pay anything yourself personally for legal costs.

assuming the estate has £300-£400k in it from house 1 and other assets. How much is value if rent for 5 years of smaller house? Say £50k. So leave that in the estate to pay out if needed plus another £50k for legals.

I can't afford a second mortgage. Still paying on my main home although still hoping that I can pay it off when this is settled.

The estate.

A bit more than that from house 1 but combined legal costs higher too.

If I could get him to take it as a lump sum I would be delighted but do not want to be in the position of having to hold estate money indefinitely in an account to pay his rent. It would be a nightmare to agree a place as he has very definite ideas on where is 'suitable'

or the estate? -this case is about the estate and you are executor. You’d not need to pay anything yourself personally for legal costs.

It’s tricky (though very common) that OP is executor and beneficiary though.

If FWB is now deemed to be a dependent/beneficiary of the estate, then I am not sure of the estate’s position on legal costs relating to FWB.