AIBU in thinking that you rarely (if ever) see an attractive pair of....

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identical twins?

I've always thought that identical twins were usually quite plain looking but obviously kept this to myself. Recently a friend of mine found out that she was expecting twins and rang me up all excited to tell me. During the conversation she said "my Mum is upset cos they are going to be identical and that means they won't be as attractive their older siblings"

I asked her how she felt about this hurtful comment and she replied that her mum was right - how often do you see good looking twins? and you are lucky if one is even attractive.

I know obviously that looks are such a small part of a child's make up but I'm the wrong person to try and boost my friends confidence on this even though I have tried.

What do other Mumsnetters think?

I don't think KIP said she had id twins, did she (where?).
Anyway, is it negligence if a mother confesser her own DC are only plain looking? Or even - gasp - below average brains wise? Do we all have to have blind love for our children to love them at all?

ok, kip does have own twins, doesn't take away what I said. I can love my kids and still see their imperfections. The two are not incompatible.

how can a grandparent point out to a MOTHER that some of her children are "more attractive" than their siblings

how can a parent honestly "grade" their children in this way

I speak as a twin and a mum

Thank- you flack. It is true that people think badly of others who dare to say their DC's are below average in any department.

Every child is a special,unique, miracle to treasure but they are not all blessed with good looks

'Every parent thinks their children are special but they can't all possibly think that their children are attractive, surely?'

mine are blardy beutiful actually!

No, but the term unattractive, is unpleasant here. However you've accepted that the sweeping generalisation was thoughtless, thank you for that. That was my biggest bugbear.

I'd still like to know how you define attractiveness however. For me, a very pretty girl can soon spoil it by having a nasty personality, and a plain girl can be beautiful by having a beautiful personality.

ok well the family i know if i had to rate them in terms of attraciveness i would say

ds2 (one of the twins)
ds1
ds3 (the other of the twins)

I was only meaning attractive in looks not personality rhubarb and obviously not everyone has the same idea of what that is.

"i get asked all the time if me and my bro are identical i always have to say well no because his a boy"

Actually, boy eggs can split leaving the Y totally on one side so you get a boy/girl identical twin, it is rare. Also can happen with identical mixed race twins that one gets all the white genes and one gets all the black ones.

how does that work cos if the y was on its own where would the x come from to make it a boy?

oh i see you mean the y part just sort of disappears? i presume that the girl would have some sort of genetic syndrome if she only had one x chromosome though?

thanks will have a look at the link now

All the girls have Turner's because are missing an X, the boys fine because he is XY.

Message withdrawn

I happen to be a rather beautiful identical twin

So there!

Bloody hell if your own mother thinks you are unattractive you're in trouble!

I am an identical twin, and I am obviously very gorgeous! Well maybe not, but I'm not that bad-looking. There were 2 other sets of identical twins at our school, and one set were really lovely looking, and the other set just average, but no worse than most other people.

So I think your theory is a load of rubbish, and also toally unscientific!

I went to school with a set of utterly lovely twins. I had a crush on both of them...

just look at Ivo and Alex on chilf of our time.

What is true though that they're always a 'plain' one - however attractive they would have been considered stand-alone

What a load of rubbish! I have known lovely looking twins and not so nice looking ones. I don't think it has anything to do with the fact they are twins, it's just life. Some people are beautiful, others (like myself!) are just average.

The twins group I run has some completely gorgeous IDs - this is nonsense! I recall reading in a TAMBA book that baby twins are often more attractive than singletons - a genetic trick to make looking after them seem not quite so onerous! Being the twins association they are probably a bit biased though .

As the mother of ID twins let me just say that mine are the most beautiful girls you will ever see!!

Actually was also aproached when they were babies by a modelling scout cos of their good looks and even now we get lovely comments, also they are very nice little girls as well....so there!!

Hi, this was bumped to the multiple birth site and I had to post. I have ID twin girls (18 months) and they are beautiful. Ok I am biased (like all parents) but I really think ID twins are something very special. From the amount of time we are stopped on the street by strangers I am guessing my babies have not fallen out of the ugly tree!!!