AIBU for blowing out my nephew’s birthday candles as a joke

[AliceNotInChains]

My nephews 6th birthday party yesterday. He was struggling to blow all the candles out so I jokingly blew the remaining ones out for him. My sister went on a full on strop over it saying I ruined his moment. AIBU to think she’s completely over reacting?? She ended up relighting the candles for him to “have another go” making it a much bigger deal than it needed to be.

She’s organised the bloody thing, not me.

So??? If you clearly don't like her then stop being forced to attend events and vacations etc that she organized. You're an adult aren't you?

Don’t bloody go then.

If you did that to my kids when they were 6 they would have been distraught! They'd have been worrying whether it had ruined their birthday wish! You can offer help to blow them out, but these things are so important to kids and we can't use our grown up logic on them. Definitely apologise to him.

So which was it? Trying to help or a joke? Because you’ve claimed both on this thread.

Trying to help is misjudged and easily solved with an apology.

A joke is a twattish thing to do and easily solved with an apology.

You’re an awful, awful person. And what “health condition” could possibly excuse this?!

It doesn't.

The OP is complaining about her other thread being brought up.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5509502-aibu-to-use-main-bathroom-on-holiday-despite-en-suite?page=1

You’re so obviously in denial

For someone you don’t like you spend an awful lot of time with her. Even if she arranges it you don’t have to go.

Since you keep going you either enjoy upsetting her or winding yourself up about her one of the two.

Just an idea for you to reflect on - do you think your nephew might’ve laughed it off because he was genuinely upset/humiliated and didn’t know how to respond in front of other people?

You seem to be focused on your sister - how would it make you feel, knowing you might’ve hurt your nephew’s feelings?

And?!? 🤣 My goodness you are self absorbed. Me, me, me, and everyone else causes my problems, never- me.

Yep. God forbid she organised a fun birthday party for her own child. What a monster.

I have no evidence for this other than my readings of what OP has said herself in her threads; but I do wonder whether she is a 'known quantity' and the whole family are used to 'putting on a brave face' at whatever she might do next.

For those of us old enough to remember Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em, Betty frequently had an awkward strained smile and laughed nervously at discovering what new caper Frank might have got up to... I really don't think she was guffawing along at what a smashing hilarious joke it all was.

Not really the point though as how were you to know which way he was going to react. What he is had a full on meltdown? What if he was hurt inside but put a brave face for the unhinged auntie!

Indeed. I highly doubt he would have been any the poorer for having missed this 'hilarious joke' if OP hadn't done it.

I also find it phenomenally implausible that a 6yo would be be guaranteed to be 'not bothered' by something that almost all 6yo children would find special and exciting. It's kind of sad if a young child doesn't find a bit of focused attention at their own birthday party - with people ready to take photos and videos - a special, valued thing.

It’s funny how OP now claims it was part of a game because people pointed out that blowing out candles isnt like tying shoelaces - it isn’t something that children need help with.

I remember the en-suite down the spooky corridor thread. That was bonkers.
You’re either a wind up merchant and enjoy laughing at MN posters getting whipped up, or you’re a bit of a dick and can’t see when you’re being totally unreasonable.
I hope it’s the former because otherwise, your family must be absolutely exasperated with you.

Yes, agree with this. I’ve known families with difficult members that they’re supposed to just tolerate because “You know what they’re like, don’t cause a scene”. OP sounds exactly like one of those people: bullies, essentially, who expect everyone else to kowtow to them, and laugh along at their various cruelties.

And if you don't, it's your fault for not keeping the peace when they make a scene as a result.

Agree. We have someone in the family like this. When they say something everyone sighs but if anyone objects then everyone just says " oh that's just M". They have to be the centre of attention, make "witty (read unkind) comments etc. They would think blowing out their nephew's candles on their cake the height of them being funny and that everyone would be saying how wonderful they are.

I've come across recently a few people (independently) who have worked with them. They are described as a bully, who continues being "funny" after they've been told that they're upsetting people. And still people say "oh that's just M".

I always think that they'd be a far nicer person if they'd been told forcibly as a small child that they weren't funny and to let others speak too. Because the way they behave is an attention seeking toddler who doesn't understand how their behaviour is inappropriate.
They think that everyone is envying them...

Of course you were unreasonable, how on earth could you think that was a joke?
I had to keep reminding my 9 year old GS to let his 7 year old sister finish blowing out her own birthday candles but I wouldn't expect to have to tell an adult!

“Why CAnT YOu TaKE a JoKe??”. Ugh.

It’s a dickish thing to do, think your other responses are very
combative too … I think it’s best you grow up a bit

You have IBS, extremely common, not some life limiting bowel disease. I too have IBS. You were a twit.

Get the feeling that OP may not be returning.