Child given money by "Vicar" at school

[TakeALookAtTheseSwatches]

So my 10 year old daughter (year 5) came home from school on Thursday and told us the Vicar (possibly just a trainee, I'm not entirely sure) who was taking their collective worship at school gave her £5 to "get herself an Easter treat" and that it was "just between me and you" I asked her if she told the teacher and she said no. I feel quite uneasy about this, should I say something to the school?

Sorry what - are we now inventing scenarios where the vicar/curate gave other kids money? So basically a vicar is going to run around a hall handing out fivers? Well maybe the OP should what's app her kids pals parents and ask if anyone else got a fiver.

Immediate danger of what?

Ok, you ARE that naive 🙄

What's the immediate danger? This isn't a child protection emergency. If there's so much risk why doesn't the OP call police?

Rather than make snide digs at me calling me naive and inventing scenarios where other children are being given money and are in danger - the Op could have called police four days ago if she felt that her and other kids were at imminent risk - this is not a child protection emergency on any level.

Maybe the kid presented as one who may not otherwise get an Easter egg…
The “just between us” could have been a don’t tell the other children thing. It beggars belief that he assumed the parents wouldn’t ask where the Easter egg came from.
Does your child have noticeably less than their peers, op?

Is it possible for your daughter to have stolen the £5 out of your purse or from someone else? And is trying to cover it up, because this is also possible. I would try and get more facts before going in all guns blazing

Obviously if the person from the church has given the money to your child then yes this person is wrong.

Sending you hugs, it's hard being a parent.

Are you crazy ? Someone tell a girl to keep a secret and gives her money , that someone is not only a male but a representative of a religion highly involved in child abuse ! I’m actually shocked the OP didn’t go straight to the police as she should , even a police officer here told her that

If a police officer on this thread advised the OP to go straight to the police then they gave duff advice.

In fact this thread is so choc full of duff advice, it’s completely pointless. The OP has emailed the school and awaits a reply, that is a totally appropriate response to this situation. If she wishes to chase up further, she can also consider emailing LADO.

All the hysteria and drama is not warranted, the professionals will follow procedure, I think most people are annoyed of the Easter holiday delay more for the lack of dramatic updates than anything else.

Many dioceses have their Chrism Mass earlier in Holy Week. Our is Thursday but I know many that are evenings earlier in the week too. I think OP has said they're in County Durham which I presume is Durham Dio.
That said it's not clear that this person is an actual vicar , but they're clearly representing the church . Reporting to Diocesan SG lead (rather than parish)and School is the way ahead.

No, there really isn't, immediate harm means the child is at risk of immediate harm which she isn't as she is at home with her parents and not in the care of someone who is going to harm her nor is there the opportunity for the potential harmer to have access to her.

Agree. I work for a diocese and this is the appropriate response as well as informing the school.

It's really weird, definitely talk to school so they can look into this. Even if there's been a misunderstanding (which I don't actually think is the case here), they need to talk with this member of the clergy. Safeguarding concern alarms are a-ringing.

You definitely need to mention it to the School. If you don't get a reply to your email I'd ask for a meeting with the Head when the school reopens & the kids return . Explain exactly what your Daughter told you, the words the 'Vicar' used & ask them to investigate why he gave her the money & why he asked her to keep it secret. It might all be innocent on his part him thinking he's doing something nice & not wanting other kids to feel left out so asked her not to say anything, however, this is classic grooming behaviour & needs challenging to be sure of his intentions. Praise you Daughter for telling you & explain why you're contacting the school, not because she's done anything wrong in accepting the money or telling you, it's to safeguard her & other kids.

OP, have you got any further with finding out how to flag a safeguarding concern during the holidays?

It concerns me that the school have provided no obvious means to do that. Their duty of care for the students doesn't just stop because it's the school holidays.

I've previously been a DSL in a school myself, and it was made clear to us in training that there must be someone monitoring emails at all times, so that if someone is put of the country for example the role falls to another trained member of staff - we would work out the rota between us.

It's not that uncommon for safeguarding concerns to arise over the holidays, when families are spending more time together, children may raise things they haven't mentioned previously, etc etc. Also issues between students may arise, and so on.

Going to the police at this point would be an over reaction as there isn't really evidence of grooming - the guy gave her a fiver but made no attempt to get the girl's contact details or anything like that - so it isn't grooming - yet - tho it is inappropriate behaviour and needs watching as it could become grooming if he has more access to her.

At this point it's inappropriate, unprofessional behaviour that needs flagging so the school can ensure it stops.

It's not actually an emergency as the child isn't at current risk of harm (providing OP is not taking her to any church events, and is confident the guy cannot access her on social media ).

So in a sense it doesn't matter if it isn't dealt with immediately - it's just bad practice on the part of the school, that there is no means to contact their DSL over the holidays, because in different situations there may be a more urgent need.

The child is at home with their parents and the school is closed.

There are childr4en out there who are being abused right now.

THEY take priority in a vastly stretched social service, and rightly so.

Yes, as pp have said upthread, it's bad practice not to have contact information for one of the Safeguarding Team.

I strongly disagree with the posters who want the OP to keep questioning her daughter. This needs to be handled gently and to keep going back to the DD and questioning her is not helpful.

I don't think it's harmful to have a gentle and supportive conversation. More details may come out, during a low pressured chit chat which could be useful.

A sofa. In a school hall. Right.

Apologies if this has already been said, but the way to go about this would be to contact the front door safeguarding multi agency number - photo attached for Durham. Link here: https://www.durham.gov.uk/firstcontact

If you email the school, put SAFEGUARDING CONCERN in the subject line so it won’t get overlooked.

OP has already talked to her multiple times.

I never said she hadn't?

Great that she’s asking the school to investigate then? 👍