Rude behaviour at buffets

[ChopstickNovice]

We are in Gran Canaria and it's been LOVELY. Not actually encountered any cheeky fuckery at all until this morning.

I was at the hot drink machine (one of 3 in a row) dispensing hot water into a teapot. A man came up beside me, paused my hot water, made himself a cappuccino and then walked off! Not a word. Didn't even look at me.

I mention that he was very old only because it maybe explains that he didn't realise I was there? But he was aware enough to stop the hot water, so....? Also there were two free machines right there!

I was so surprised I didn't say anything.

Please tell me your stories of buffet (all inclusive or otherwise) cheeky fuckery!

I can only think that his thinking was that a teapot is massive and will take ages to fill, whereas my mug is only small and will be full quickly.

Even though the difference will only be a matter of seconds... and even if it weren't, you got there first. Just the same as if the supermarket only has one checkout open and you only have two things when the person in front has already emptied out their bulging trolley: it's just tough luck.

Having said that, though, I bet there was a lot of main character syndrome involved too. Like the woman in the other thread who ate 8 of the cakes that OP had taken into work, meaning that several people didn't get any, and boasted about it - I think there are so many people who just subconsciously assume that only they matter.

It would never occur to me that i wasn't allowed to take quiche or cheese and onion rolls at a buffet. They're a standard part of my diet, as is meat.

Obviously if something were on a separate table with a sign saying "For vegetarians" or if it were a clearly-labelled meat-alternative designed for vegetarians, such as vegan sausage rolls next to the normal ones, I would probably guess that the veggies would be wanting those in particular - just as I would assume that the turkey dinosaurs or alphabites were primarily intended for the children; but just because somebody has chosen to restrict their diet to 'X' group of options, I don't think it's fair to expect omnivores to consciously restrict themselves to only the 'Y' group of options - especially not at a buffet of all places.

I agree that it's definitely a matter for the caterers to bear in mind and provide enough of a range and suitable proportions for everybody - including those who will only eat plants, those who will only eat plants and dairy, and those who will eat everything.

Allergy needs and special orders should of course be separate and clearly labelled.

I don't know why, but that just cracked me up laughing. That would have left me speechless!

Although I'm very good at a snide - don't worry about me, take my food, stick your grubby fingers in it and pass it back. No need for either thanks or apologies Mum... Shirt off my back when there's no bog roll? Okay... Getting carried away now!

That was my first thought, teapot will take longer to fill, I'll just nip in quick (without acknowledgement or indeed knowledge of what he's started on Mumsnet 🤣)

Or... @ChopstickNovice has said teapot but actually meant bucket.

On the whole veggie debate... I was vegetarian for 15 years. This was before Quorn let alone all this fake shite. Most of my meals were vegan by default - vegetable curries and chillis. I was eating cheese and eggs so...

Anyway - I don't want to eat chicken wings, donkey ham, nuggets, sausage rolls or whatever processed muck has been offered up, so I would choose some quiche and salad and - tbh whatever looked tastiest to me.
I'm not aware of the number of vegetarians attending, I'm not aware that they've scrimped on the nice things but Iceland came good. It's also not my problem. It's the hosts fault if they can't see past cheap frozen crap.

And without sounding like Uncle Albert... In my day... There were no veggie alternatives - quiche and pizza yes, other than that - salad, bread. Or... Look there's a chicken curry, just pick the chicken out! 😂

If it bothers you that much contact the hosts or the caterers first.
I did a French Exchange trip in 1992... Stephanie the French girl had already stayed with me, so the next year - me with her. Oh it was so awkward. Clearly her Mum thought I must be shit at French 🤣 She'd made a nice hearty chicken stew for me for after the long coach journey. Stephanie was trying to explain vegetarian and her Mum was losing the plot listing all the meats, poultry and fish.. Non?! Non?! Non?!!! Every meal I had asparagus in a vinagerette and a bowl of peas. They were lovely! You don't get asparagus in the midlands early 90s!

So yeah anyway.

I'll shut up now.

I eat meat but really don't like sausage rolls or chicken wings. I much prefer the cheese and onion rolls and that's what I buy if I'm in the mood for that kind of food. Also the majority of people are omnivores and love trying new things. Perhaps vegans/vegetarians should go first though I suspect some 'Russian carnivores' would pose as such and take the best meat options!

@MyGammyEye it's probably different nowadays but the French didn't use to understand the idea of vegetarians. Dd1 went on a French exchange around 2006 with her vegetarian friend (they were both staying with the same family) and at every meal she was offered meat!

It’s not just about the veggies though. At one lovely hotel there was a GF section, nice chickpea stews, rice, lentils etc on offer but only 2 options each meal often vegetable based.
Every meal there were people taking both then going over and putting pies, meat in gravy (not gf) on their plates
try being gf, dairy free and veggie- ok the veggie is by choice but the rest is not.
I avoid buffets or take my own food now just incase.

😦 How awful

I was at a Christmas do, many years ago and a woman from HR snatched a slice of quiche off my plate, whilst browsing the buffet. I snapped,

"What the Hell are you doing? That's mine!"

"Well, I wanted to try some," she replied.

I went back to the table and took one of the many other slices; I didn't want to have a massive row.

Wow!

Yes, that's an important angle I find: most meaty options in most buffets tend to use really cheap, nasty and/or processed meat.

It tends to be that cheese is cheese, salad is salad etc. - and of an overall much better quality.

I don't see why, just because I would always enjoy a decent steak or a proper chicken breast in a restaurant, I should be expected to take the horrible crunchy meat-based items and leave the much nicer options at a buffet. It kind of smacks of an unwritten "Look, you eat meat, you could have that!" - which I would find restrictive and prescriptive and wouldn't want any more than the veggies would want something disgusting foisted on them on the basis that it's technically plant-based, or to be told that they could "Just leave/pick out the bits of chicken".

i used to know somebody who used the most nasty ingredients in her cooking - out of date mushy stuff, elderly tomatoes that had turned to liquid, veg offcuts that still had mud on them. She did eat meat, but only ever if somebody else supplied (and paid for) it. Needless to say, I never took her up on her 'special' (meat-free) offerings... and neither did any of my veggie friends!!

Of course, none of this is the fault of the vegetarians. I guess the main solution would be to either offer decent quality meat options or (much as it pains me to say) don't bother with meat at all, if they can't provide meat that is actually nice.

I will always remember when I went on a school exchange trip to Germany over 30 years ago. One girl (and her whole family) was vegan... and because it was their norm, it never occurred to them for a moment to tell her host family.

Veganism was far less known about and understood in Britain in the early 90s; but she was going to Germany!!

hotel buffet recently, some woman took the entire trayful of pain au chocolat which she piled high onto a couple of plates back to their table for their family to share, they must have had 8/9 apiece, I had been patiently waiting in line for these and was so pissed off. Asked a member of staff if they had more and the hotel had of course then run out for the day. Watched as their kids sat there working their way through the pile picking out all the chocolate centre and ditching the pastry in an unwanted heap while the parents looked on indulgently at their little darlings 😡

I've been in a buffet situation this week. No problems at all.

I am not vegetarian or vegan, but think there is lots of vegetarian and vegan food that is absolutely delicious - so I can’t understand why buffets don’t have lots of vegetarian/vegan food, with some extra options for the meat eaters (sausage rolls, quiche lorraine, chicken drumsticks) - I would be perfectly happy, and the vegetarians and vegans would have a good chance of getting an actual meal!

Yes, that's an important angle I find: most meaty options in most buffets tend to use really cheap, nasty and/or processed meat.

This is why I always go for veggie options at parties/work events/eating out. Although I’m not vegetarian or vegan I don’t eat that much meat and prefer to eat meat that I or DH have chosen and cooked.

Absolutely disgusting behaviour - and of course, she's modelling that it's acceptable to her children, so it could go on for decades or more down the family line.

I don't know if it's pure selfishness, thickness or a mixture of both that makes people think that a non-pre-portioned serving amount equates to "I've paid for ALL of this". Do they genuinely think that the amount they've paid per person (and some don't even charge for children) is sustainable for the establishment if every person takes enough food for 10 people?

Even more appalling than taking multitudes too much and eating it all is taking it all and then just leaving it. What do they actually think they've gained by sending back huge piles of good food to the bin rather than letting other people enjoy it?

I once took my parents away to a hotel where a family kept stealing my mother’s toast as it came out of the (admittedly mind numbing slow conveyor thingy). The first time it happened I giggled as absurd stuff happens to her all the time, the second I said something to the dad… and the third I went up and took the plate off their table!

There was also the year my aunt took the poolside burgers at an AI for reheating and gave her entire family food poisoning. I had run off to the shop for some crisps and she’d chastised my parents for wasting the 50 pesatas or whatever it was by not stocking up. Insanity.

ive had the good fortune of many a buffet in my time. I will NEVER understand the people who seem to forget that they have the option to (OMG!) go back up and get a second croissant if they so wish. Once saw a couple with 12 bread rolls and pastries between them - they didn’t even politely wrap them up for lunch!

He was arrested because they tried to kick him out and he wasn't having any of it and got rowdy with the staff, so they called the police

Incidentally, I was in the same Toby carvery for breakfast this morning and watched a man break every yolk on about 8-9 fried eggs then complained to staff that they were all "battered up" and he wanted fresh, then smuggly stood there with a smirk on his face and went "that's how you get fresh food" to his wife......there was a massive queue of people who would of had those eggs who were all now delayed and stood there because he wanted fresh eggs 🙄

My parents married in '67 and held the reception at a local pub. Afterwards the pub staff tried to take the leftover (as in untouched) sandwiches, sausage rolls etc. downstairs to sell to customers in the pub! My DF stopped them, reminding them that he had already paid for them and was taking them back home! Before anyone throws around accusations of meanness, budgets were tight then; you didn't give away food that you'd paid for.

Omg this at the pizza hut buffet (this is very unMN I know) but the omnivores have got a plate full of Hawaiian, farmhouse etc then on top goes the last veggie supreme 😭 noooooooo

Not CF but I was once chatting to my DH as I was getting a coffee from the dispenser, at breakfast in a Premier Inn where we were staying. Looked behind to see a bemused looking stranger, in similar coloured top and trousers to my DH, who was away sitting at our table. 🫣 🤦‍♀️😅

I'd spent ages making toast for me and DH in the candle-powered toaster. As I placed the final slice on the plate, a man walked up, picked up my plate of toast and fucked off with it. Yep. He was Russian.

I actively do my research in the hope of avoiding hotels that are popular with Russians. They are the rudest twats in all hoteldom.

I've seen Russian guests strip a breakfast buffet, put it all on their tables, then leave most of. Hotel staff were scared of them.

I've always hated buffet style meals, the meat eaters always seem to load up their plates with the veggie dishes as well as the meat ones, so there's only the unpopular meat items like sausage rolls left and nothing for us poor veggies except for a few lettuce leaves. Never seems to occur to omnivores that they shouldn't eat all the non meat items.