Rude behaviour at buffets

[ChopstickNovice]

We are in Gran Canaria and it's been LOVELY. Not actually encountered any cheeky fuckery at all until this morning.

I was at the hot drink machine (one of 3 in a row) dispensing hot water into a teapot. A man came up beside me, paused my hot water, made himself a cappuccino and then walked off! Not a word. Didn't even look at me.

I mention that he was very old only because it maybe explains that he didn't realise I was there? But he was aware enough to stop the hot water, so....? Also there were two free machines right there!

I was so surprised I didn't say anything.

Please tell me your stories of buffet (all inclusive or otherwise) cheeky fuckery!

Why do you think I didn't?!

I didn't ramble on with the whole nine-page summary of it because this thread is - and you seem a bit confused by it? - probably intended for everyone to share stories and enjoy gasping over each other's experiences. It's not a formal statement made under oath for the buffet police!

Um because if you'd stopped it surely your story would have read "my brother TRIED to go for second, third and fourth helpings/my uncle ALMOST didn't get any food" rather than saying both those things happened? Doesn't need 9 pages, 2 extra words would have made all the difference.

Oh, good lord.

When I wrote 'why do you think I didn't' I meant it as a reply to 'why do you think I didn't say anything'. Believe me, I did.

I'm sorry, but I find this really tedious. Surely you can see that the OP is not looking to have a huge boring discussion worthy of publishing in some big etiquette book. She's just sharing a story, which we all do from time to time.

Sure, she could have said something - but she was shocked and didn't.

Sure, I could have physically frog-marched my brother out of the wedding venue and told him to write 'I will not be a pig' 200 times. But I didn't.

It's not really about that.

Worst holiday we ever had was in 2017 at a 5* hotel in Olu Deniz, Turkey. The place was overrun with the rudest Russians I've ever encountered. Hundreds of them. Piling their plates high from the buffet with all the best things. Like, ALL of the langoustines, Lobster tails and crevettes. ALL OF THEM. Placing them down on their table and picking at them, then leaving with most of them uneaten. Every day for 7 days. Rude, loud and obnoxious.

Not RTFT but meat-eaters looking at all the vegetarian/vegan options and deciding (sometimes verbally and openly!) 'Ooh that's different, I'll try that!' leaving nothing for actual vegetarians and vegans to eat, happens quite a lot IME.

A woman once asked me if her son could have the slice of pizza on my plate because there was no more left. I agreed because he was little and they eat what they eat...and she took it off my plate and put it on his. He poked it and said he didn't want it because it had 'stuff on it' (mayo from the potato salad) so she tried to put it back on my plate.

I think this is tough.

there is no reason a meat eater cannot and should not chose to eat the non meat option

if there's not enough for the vegetarians and vegans as well that's a catering issue rather than the meat eaters fault

I was raised vegetarian and have never eaten meat in my life but I think the point of a buffet is having what you fancy and I don't think vegetarians have a monopoly on the veg 😄

No but it can be a problem at catered lunches where people's dietary requirements have been requested in advance. In such situations I have always thought the specially requested meals should be served separately but they are just so often served buffet style alongside everything else.

Years ago I was in Sharm El-Sheikh and at the lunch buffet in the hotel a group of Russians basically picked up several whole trays of food and took them back to their table. Anyone who complained to them were basically told to fuck off. Even the staff were scared of them. Absolutely scumbag behaviour.

Oh that's definitely true and if it is a buffet that is replenished that is one thing.
I've seen it happen at family gatherings where people know one another (including my own extended family's 'dos' as well, where they plainly know they're going to deprive someone of a meal but they still do it, which I think is slightly different! Just rude.

This happens to me all the time! People take all the vegetables/beans/lentils then go over and add meat, these are often my only options as im also gf

Bizarre. Did he not see you and perhaps think someone had been cheeky by leaving the teapot unattended?

I always try and equate it to really hating a dish. It doesn't mean others have to save you a different option - would be nice if they did but people are selfish particularly around food lol

When we went AI to Turkey the Russians were like locusts food cleared in seconds I've actually never in my life seen anything like it 🤦‍♀️ luckily there was a small pub attached to the hotel with its own pool and we ate there the food was much better and cheap .

Sooo are they supposed to just have a plate of meat and nothing else ????

I’m a meat eater and I feel so bad for vegetarians/vegans when this happens.
I was at a wedding last summer where the evening food was a hog roast but they had 10 portions of a vegan option. I was queuing next to two friends who are vegan and the van announced “there are only two vegan portions left so please let us know who they’re for”
My friends raised their hands and said “us please” but the couple in front of us still requested the vegan option… and they weren’t vegan.
My friend overheard them ordering and said “sorry, did you guys request that on the invite? As my partner and I did and that’s all we can have”
The woman simply replied “we can order what we want, just because we’re not vegan it doesn’t mean we can’t have it”
It was so awkward, I could tell even the vendor didn’t want to serve them!
My friends then went without and could only have some crisps from behind the bar, so selfish of that couple!

Well, yes. Perhaps it’s easier to have a trivia drama online nowadays. 🙄

It always happens at office lunches to DH who's gf. Even when the gf options are set out separately. Thats when he/anyone else who's gf is actually remembered.

I think this is organisation/vendor issue.

if they have only made the exact amount required then they need to be labelled specifically with who they're for. If they're there as "an option" then someone who doesn't fancy or like hog roast is equally able to chose them.

I guess as being vegetarian is normally a choice, and some people are quite lax with it people seem less considerate than of other things 🤷‍♀️

At a hotel in the Caribbean, a very nice buffet and hotel a woman came in with several Tupperware containers and filled them all up at dinner, she said to the person next to her they got the midnight munchies so took them back to their room.

of them all on this thread, the brother going round a wedding venue eating the left overs off of people’s plates is the one which stands out. That’s really odd behaviour.

I was at a work event dinner recently and a male colleague looked at me when I’d finished and said are you going to eat that, as I’d left some food on my plate, I said no I’m full, and he said ok tnem I’ll have it and took my plate. I guess waste not want not, but not something you normally do at work events 😂

Blimey the Russians are coming off well 😂

Yes it could have been organised better - the married couple said the following day they should have asked for 15-20 portions instead of sticking to the exact number.

I still think it was mean of that couple to take the last two portions though! Especially where my friends were literally stood next to them saying “that’s all we can have”

It does.
It is perfectly clear.

This is exactly my experience in Turkey. There was an hour each afternoon that fresh doughnuts would be served at a poolside bar. Everyone else would queue. Then a Russian would go straight to the front and put every single doughnut on their plate and walk off. They would start making more, people in the queue would take one or two in turn, then another Russian would cut to the front and take every single one again!

Have seen some shocking behaviour at hotel buffets.

But the OP's example of stopping the hot water to make his own drink reminded me of someone I worked with years ago. If he wanted to heat his food in the microwave and someone else's was in there (and timer still going) he would stop the timer, dump their food on top and put his own in. He literally wouldn't wait 1 minute. He was a partner and thought he was more important than anyone else. He got struck off a few years ago for breaking rules of professional conduct which didn't surprise me one bit.