Are other full-time working families finding there is nothing left?

[fatface001]

Alarm went off at 5:30 this morning, then an hour stood on a packed train into London for the commute. We are a normal family: one child and two full-time jobs. I’ve always enjoyed working and have always worked hard, and I don’t mind that at all — but I do expect that full-time work should still mean there’s something left at the end of the month for a normal life.

But that really doesn’t feel like the case anymore.

There’s nothing left at the end of the month. Everything has been stripped back, all non-essentials have gone, and even basic things around the house are being put off or done ourselves because there isn’t spare money for trades. It’s just constant cutting back.

What’s hard is that we’re both working really long hours and doing everything we’re “supposed” to do, but it still feels like we’re going backwards rather than getting ahead.

When I hear talk about “those with the broadest shoulders” contributing more, I honestly don’t recognise it anymore in real life. It doesn’t feel like anyone in our position has anything left to give — it feels like the pressure is entirely on ordinary working households just to stand still.

I’m not looking for luxuries — just the sense that working still gives you a bit of breathing room. Right now it doesn’t feel like that at all.

Is anyone else feeling the same?

This. We are up north family of 6 and manage comfortably on under 30k a year

I'm sure some people want those that have difficult, well paid, highly skilled roles to have no luxuries and to be happy to hand a huge proportion of their money to those that don't. All evens out that way. I'm sure this is what Labour seem to be aiming towards.

£30k a year? Does that include child benefit? Anything else? 'Free' school meals?

No we just want them to stop whinging their poor when they have no idea what being poor is, its very hard to have sympathy for someone earning 150k a year saying they are struggling

They just buy really expensive things/have an expensive lifestyle.
However much people have, they want more.

That's everything yes and no free school meals as kids to old and to young. Our mortgage is £600 a month, no childcare costs, no debt, no credit cards, 10 year old car,

I'm in Ireland so possibly a bit different, but we are just shy of a six figure income (before tax). We take home about €5k per month after tax and pension contributions. We waited years to have kids until we were financially "stable"... which now seems anecdotal. We have a mortgage of just over €1k, we have 2 paid for cars (albeit older and we could certainly do with upgrading at least one). However our childcare costs are abiut to double in 2027, to about €1.8k a month. So that's 60% of our take home lay gone before I even consider buying groceries, bills liek gas and electricity, diesel or home heating oil, we generally don't buy clothes for ourselves but obviously kids outgrow things relatively quick. We also have debt of over €1k a month too unfortunately (medical / household upgrade necessities etc). I have one massage a year which is a birthday gift, I get my hair done 2-3 times a year etc... i.e. we don't flash the cash.

This year we took in an exchange student to try to build up a savings buffer knowing that when childcare costs increase, it'll be much harder to save. However, a sequence of white goods breaking down in the house and car repairs (given the age of the cars now) meant that we ended up having to dip into that fund already.

So yes, people might look at us and think ohhh figure salary but after tax, mortgage and childcare there's little left.

Just out of interest, how do you think the benefit people are getting on?
I went from 80 K a year to £1400 a month with my mortgage being 663 of that
So I’m intrigued how you think the benefit people are winning here?

I don't work. Husband earns about 75 k/y. Two teenagers, one autistic. At first I wanted to be a sahm until children started school. Then my DS1 had so many appointments during the day + Husband gone irregularly every week for work that it just wasn't possible. Now it is possible to work school hours (need to be home for DS1 morning- afternoon) so I looked at what was available. TA 700 £/ month. Before tax. And dh wouldn't help at home because work long hours. So I would get home tired and have to deal with everything needs to be doing myself (cleaning, laundry, food prep, homework ds2) + deal with DS1s outbursts and regulate him.
No, I prefer not working.and go to the gym/ for walks. Clean/laundry/food prep during the day so that I can spend quality tume with my dc and be well rested.
I appreciate that it's different for those with high earning potential that can outsource home stuff but for me it's not worth it.

How on earth to people think that those on benefits are not stretched! DP lost his job through no fault of his own and is struggling to find another one in his 60s
A single person on UC gets £400 pcm, local housing allowance does not even cover the rent which has to be topped up so he has less than £70 a week to cover all bills and food which is just not possible

YANBU.
Know we earn enough for day to day.

But im sat at work, my kids are home in front of screens. Dad asleep cos he works nights.

And I see loads of activities and holiday days out on for kids via HAF. Which we are not eligible for.

First thing I heard today in the office was today is pay day. We are million of people across the country having the same issue.
They are milking us.

But, people who have been are now not…so, the cleaner and the coffee shop don’t get the business. If there’s a tightening of budgets at a higher level that trickles down. There are heaps of local businesses I’d like to still be in a position to support; beauticians, local clothes shops, coffee shops, local restaurants…these are the places that keep our community vibrant and alive. However, because I now have to give Tesco/ASDA 40% more for my shopping I can’t buy that coffee.

When I was a working mother and my husband working hard too, we never had any spare money for several years and were actually very hard up for a time. There was an awful recession in the 1980s/90s which affected everything and nearly everyone. It was demoralising.

I do sympathise with you but it strikes me that people with young families all seem to go through the same. At the moment you are experiencing hardship, it marvellous to just be able to make ends meet every month. I know other young people like you.

All I can say is, it doesn't last forever. The cloud will lift, just hang on in there.

lol, yeah they ususally "forget" about the other £30k worth of benefits they get in the form of housing benefit, universal credit, free school meals, free prescriptions, free dental care, PIP, child benefit, child support, council tax reduction yada yada yada I could go on.

The Tories designed and introduced the UC system.

Anyway, those on UC have their benefits reduced by £4.35 per month for every £250 they have above £6k in savings.

You are angry at the wrong people.

Theyve been doing that with House prices for the last 30 years
It used to be a third on Housing and bills
A third for savings and a third for fun
That’s been long gone since Housing and bills crept up to nearly 60%
And now literally the other 40% is going on food that’s it. It’s all gone.
If we were American, we’d be going into Debt
They qualify for credit cards, whether they’re working or not, whether there’s any affordability or not and then when the inevitable hits the fan this insecured Debt becomes secured Debt and they take the assets.
That will be us in the next 10 years

Hey, money might be tight but at least we can still enjoy a nice bit of benefits bashing. It’s not much but being able to look down our noses at people while the rich criminals laugh at us is remains of life’s simple pleasures, even in these straightened times.

I am quite fearful for the future. The Iran/US/Israel war does not look like it will end any time soon and if it does not there will be a significant inflationary increase in food and other basics which will be difficult to afford. I am also afraid that we will see further tax rises to fund increased welfare and that mortgage rates will not fall as expected but rise. I fear being ever more squeezed and that none of these parties really cares very much about me or people like me.

Yep. People are sheep and bleating what they've read in the Mail/Times/Telegraph. Blame the people on benefits/immigrants etc. etc.

I earn about £28k and I'm single with a teenager, but my ex pays the mortgage so dont have that to worry about

I'm not entitled to any benefits other than child benefit (which goes straight into DD's savings)

I'm not going on holidays, but I spend about the equivalent of a coffee every day on crap/takeaway over the week etc

I'm not well off, but I'm far from destitute! If you are on a six figure salary and struggling, you are doing something very wrong

We get sweet FA from the banks taking that interest off you every month

Well they keep 370,000 people employed and pay £43bn in tax each year. That’s not an insignificant contribution to the UK economy.

I think the commuting is part of it. Way before CoL crisis I worked out that my main "hobby" was commuting - it was the thing I was choosing to spend a huge chunk of my leisure time on every day and it didn't leave time for other hobbies. I applied for jobs further out, fully expecting to need to take a massive pay cut, but I was quickly offered a job that paid more than my London one and saved me ££ & hours in commuting. The difference in quality of life was immense.

We then moved further out & got a bigger detached house without increasing the mortgage. Again another quality of life improvement.

Focus on what levers you have - there may be more than you think. I was wrong to assume my job was only doable in London and I couldn't earn the same salary somewhere cheaper.

Mortgage is often the highest proportion of where wages goes. I bet if you had to find an extra £500 to £1000 a month, you'd notice a difference!

Same. There'll be no family holiday this year, we don't eat out any more and very very rarely have a takeaway, we no longer have a cleaner, I haven't bought any new clothes for myself bar knickers for 2 years, I'm a company director and have taken a massive paycut to try and keep my business afloat, the bills keep rising, I have fuck all in my pension, the cash reserves in my business have gone trying to keep all my employees in their jobs, too... Two adults, 6 figure income, one child.

I freely admit I have among the broadest shoulders and I do not need your tiny violins, but I am also not willing to work this hard (8am to 11pm most days) to be taxed any more. It needs to come from the millionaires, billionaires and corporations now.

To be clear, I know people are struggling way more than me, and I do not resent anyone claiming any benefits at all. Our economy is wildly unbalanced. The very rich are getting even richer, off working people's backs, while telling us it's the fault of benefits leeches and immigrants. It really is not.