Do you think a women's size 16 is fat?

[LegencyMonsters]

Met a friend for coffee today and we got onto the topic of weight.

I mentioned that I used to be a size 16 and said I’m glad I’m not that size anymore as I was fat. She disagreed, saying a size 16 isn’t fat and pointed out that it’s actually the average size for women in the UK. I replied that while it may be the average, that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s not fat.

Would you consider a size 16 to be fat or not?

AIBU - YES - of course!
YANBU - NO - Not fat at all!

I brought something yesterday which was a size 16 in one shop. I tried the 14 on and it fitted but it wasn’t a comfortable fit. And in another shop I brought items which was a size 14. I also tried on a size 14 item which was nice fit around my tummy, gaping at the shoulder and too tight at the bust. 🤷‍♀️ I sort of ignore sizing as I think each shop makes up its own sizing.

I’m a 14/16 at 5ft9 and 11.5st- I must admit I prefer lose comfortable clothing , especially over my big bust.
I’m not considered overWeight by GP or cardiologist.
People are surprised when I tell them I often wear a 16.

Yes, this is what it always comes back to. Inconsistency, even within the same brand. Yes, some is inevitable e.g. stretchy top will be more forgiving of a large bust than a fitted cotton blouse, but you can take two fitted cotton blouses from the same shop, in the same size but different styles, and one fits and the other is wildly out.

I've got clothes of four different sizes in my wardrobe that all fit me.

It really wasn't this bad 30 or 40 years ago. I was consistently a size 12 in the 1980s/1990s, and the few items I still own from those days fit me well (I am a similar weight at the moment, haven't always been over the years but there are some garments I love so much I have kept them through fat periods and thin periods!)

I've got clothes of four different sizes in my wardrobe that all fit me.

Same. Mine range from 10 to 16. It’s completely bonkers.

Brands knew who their customers were back then and could profile accordingly. People overall were smaller too and there wasn't such a range of size diversity.

Now nobody knows who their customer is and even brands that don't directly compete with Shein et al will be affected by how such companies have changed the benchmark and the industry.

It's an absolute crap shoot these days. Just work out what size you tend to be with the brands you like, accept a margin of error even there and befriend a local seamstress. And just completely ignore clothes sizing as a measure of anything. The scale and a tape measure will tell you what you need to know about your weight and size.

I don’t find this and never have, not with anything with a fixed waist band, stretchy or over sized clothes, yes, but anything with a fixed waist band, then it’s always between two sizes depending on the fit and cut.

I usually buy Next high waist band jeans, recently bought 3 size 8s in different colours. One is a fair bit smaller than the others, I have size 10 pair and they are smaller than all the size 8s. I also have a size 12 pair but they are the mid waist ones, these are tight round my middle but baggy everywhere else.

Mostly I agree that its generally 1-2 size difference though. Next is really odd, some people find that they come up big and others find true to size/small. One of the cashiers I spoke to was size 6-8 and had to buy size 10 jeans, I think height makes a difference in some cuts as they may sit closer to hips rather than weight.

I would say yes - UNLESS the woman is unusually tall and broad framed.

I say that as a 5'9" - athletic build (always wide at the hips, and sturdy legs, no matter how low my weight goes) currently overweight at 12st 7lbs. I wear a 14 and feel bigger than I should be (given the exercise and diet routine I follow). Also get marked up as 'overweight' each time the GP weights me..

So yes, 16 is fat. Just because it's average doesn't mean it's okay.

I don’t wear fixed waist clothes since the menopause stole my waist and they were incredibly difficult before because anything that fitted my hips meant I could get both hands in the waistband. My hourglassness was of cartoon proportions.

Next I think is the other exception. With markies. Next sizing is usually overly generous. I’ve not shopped in there for ages though.

markies used to be over generous too. But recently it’s much smaller.

usually an eight in there I’ve an inch or so spare at the waist band, so it’s comfy. But I recently ordered some wide leg Jean trousers. And god not only were they awful really shit material I had to really breath in to get the waist done up. But the hips were massive and ballooned out. The cut was also awful

but generally I find whatever size I am, and I’ve been them all, it’s between two sizes as uk dress sizes have a range of two inches at the waist band. So the example in this thread is a 16 can be 34-36 as standard uk size 16 waist.

so you can find you’re an 8-10, 10-12, 12-14, 14-16, 16-18 and so on. And I find that true of most retailers.

tne issue comes in when people start talking about something over sized. Like jumpers, shirts, elastic waist band trousers etc, and then saying they can get in something much smaller. It’s fairly moot; I can get in me and em size 4 elastic waist band trousers and they fit me better, but I’m not a size four nor would I pretend to be. In a fixed waist band I’m generally an 8, sometimes a 10 somewhere like next or even markies a few months ago and a 8 would be loose, as they were so generous. Vanity sizing at its worst

so for me, dress size is on waist band, when it’s fixed, and accepting there are a couple of retailers who indulge in vanity sizing.

‘Markies’ 🤮

After telling me I couldn’t possibly have clothes in four sizes that fit you’ve just proved that I’m telling the truth. Make up your mind.

Gosh you’re so rude to posters, so angry.

I’m not in the least angry. Frustrated perhaps. You don’t think it’s rude to imply someone is lying?

I’ve got 2 dresses from asos
one is a curve asos and the other straight sizing asos
the straight sizing is a 14, the curve is a 24. I am neither of those sizes and if I lay them on top of each other, they’re near identical

Oh and M&S fixed waistband trousers I have in a 16 and 22

Next dresses are always very generously sized. I don't buy their jeans so can't comment on those.

Did your friend think you were getting at her?
It's not nice when people thinner than you talk about how very fat they are?

Rude in fact.

I think this could well be it - unless the friend is a size 10 or something. I used to hate it when someone who was already 5 sizes smaller than me went on about how they’d managed to lose 10lb and how much difference it had made.

Depends on your height and frame. I’m 5ft1 and a B cup so it would be big for me. Someone who’s 5ft7 and naturally curvier could pull it off.

I agree slim people shouldn't complain 'how very fat they are' to their overweight friends, but it should be OK for anyone to talk openly about their weight (or any health concerns) with their friends.
I've always been slim. If I put on a lot of weight I'd like to think my friends would understand I was unhappy/concerned about myself, NOT having a dig at them. Obviously I would be conscious of friends who were desperately unhappy or had major issues.

Slim people can have 'fat days' as well.

I've got a variety of sizes because some things are meant to be oversized, but I don't wear them oversized and also some clothes I got in second hand shops were only available in one size and if that fit, I bought it. Added to that the differences between shops and the differences over time...

If you are say 5ft 7-6ft then no its not but if say 5ft it could be as the smaller you are, you can look chunkier.

I'm 9st 3 (which I appreciate is a little bit less but I'm tall so it doesn't make a huge difference) and I'm an 8 in F&F, Nutmeg, Nobody's Child, H&M, New Look. Occasionally a 10 but mostly an 8.

It's not rude. Am I supposed to pretend I don't need to lose weight because some person who is obese doesn't think I need to?