AIBU to think weekly mass at Catholic schools feels quite intense?

[Endoftheway]

My DH and I have 3 children, we are going to be moving after summer to a new town, quite far from where we are right now.
Our children are baptised Catholic but really we don’t go to church much, I’d say it’s very much cultural Catholicism more than true belief.
Anyway the town we are moving to has one secondary school with a very good reputation, but it’s hard to get into as it’s a Catholic school, the admissions criteria right now has

1. Baptised Catholic Children attending a feeder school (any of the about 7 Catholic primary schools in the wider area)

Since that is the first line of the admissions criteria we are looking at the Catholic primary schools. Our children are currently in a Catholic primary school and I’d say the religious element is notable not all consuming, they have lots of children in the school who aren’t Catholic and many who are other religions.

What has shocked me is, the Catholic primary school we are looking at has a weekly mass, that is open to the public and all pupils attend, the above mentioned secondary school also has a weekly mass open to the public.

This has shocked me, one as the secondary school is losing a period a week to mass and as I find it hard to believe enough of the children are actually Catholic!
I understand that these are Catholic schools and I am all for prayers in assembly, and a general Catholic culture but weekly mass seems quite unavoidable for any children who aren’t Catholic or who are questioning religion.

AIBU to think this is quite intense? Even my schools growing up weren’t like this!

But only if it’s high achieving, right? You don’t see people scouring their attics for the baptismal certificates to get into low achieving schools…..😂😂😂

Wait! What?? A Catholic school, holding Mass once a week?? You'll be telling us all the Pope is Catholic next.

What did you think they would be doing? Did you think the school was just pretending to be Catholic? The school will be part of a Diocese and will very much be Catholic.

Choose a secular school OP, you are not well-matched with this school's culture, ethos or beliefs.

My sons first school was the only Catholic school for miles (rural area). That's why he went, because we're Catholic.

I just don't get if the OPs children are Catholic AND it's a high achieving school, what the problem is? If they weren't Catholic I'd possibly understand a bit more!

Well...they shouldn't

I went to a Catholic secondary school - in the prehistoric days. We had mass once a term.

I don't agree with state funded faith schools at all, but if you're going to send your kids to a catholic school, then I think you should be prepared to accept the catholic bits.

I would never have sent my dd to a catholic school because I didn't want that kind of education for her.

I am, and always have been, an atheist. But since I was brought up by very Catholic parents (papal honours, 5 priests and
Sung Mass at my Dad’s funeral etc) I had a wholly Catholic upbringing which involved:

primary

• Sunday mass
• weekly school mass
• Daily prayers at school and home before/after meals and start/end of day
• Mass on days of obligation
• attending parish funerals

secondary

• mandatory RC RE GCSE and RE in all years
• optional lunchtime mass weekly
• mandatory half term mass
• sunday mass and holy days mass at home

College (catholic college in predominantly Muslim area):

• termly mass for all students regardless of faith
• optional weekly mass
• Sunday Mass and holy days at home

my sons went to a CE primary which has weekly worship and regular ‘in church’ events but it’s the nearest school so we live with it and the boys are as atheist as I am despite religious grandparents on both sides (my side being Catholic, his side being a non-Christian religion)

I always enjoyed Mass - time to be quiet with my thoughts and reflect on things - even without any believe in the rest of it

Yes, of course you're being unreasonable. Ridiculous question.

I’m not catholic but went to a catholic school. Weekly mass was just part of what we did. I quite enjoyed it tbh.

If you think lying to children about the existance of an entirely fictional character by an institution which is fundamentally rotten to the core, then sure, that helps.

It’s a bit off topic but if the school is difficult to get into, are you sure that they do not also require regular (at least fortnightly) attendance in church? My nieces went to an oversubscribed CofE school and this effectively required baptism before a certain age and weekly attendance at church for at least five years.

I remember looking at the entry requirements for Grey Coat Hospital and they gave different ratings, depending on whether you attend church weekly / fortnightly and had done so for over five years / between two and five years / less than two years.

I will also say that a friend who is an observant Catholic does not miss mass. Even if she is travelling. So my first mass (I went with her) was in a French ski resort.

YABVU.

Like it or lump it.

Do you honestly expect a Catholic school to cater to your version of what the religion entails?

One of the schools we’ve applied for has weekly church visits and a stronger religious vibe that we’d like (CofE not catholic). We’re not wild about it, but are tolerating it as on balance the pros outweigh those cons.

Our local Catholic primary and secondary do the same.

It's simple really. If you don't like the way a Catholic school operates then don't send your children to it. You are just using the school to get what you want and have the audacity to complain that they are operating as a Catholic school. Unbelievable.

My sentiments too

I went to a state primary school in Scotland in the 1980s. Catholic kids were excused every morning (I can't remember for how long) to go to Catechism. We had weekly assemblies at which ministers or priests from local churches would take turns to preside. I seem to recall that the Catholic kids had the option to opt out of assembly if it was the Church of Scotland or Episcopalian minister, but nobody else got to opt out if it was the Catholic priest's turn. I may have this wrong. But anyway, is attendance at Mass mandatory?

But enough about the Royal Family what do you think about the Catholic Church?

The problem is that she doesn’t want them to practice Catholicism during school hours.

I mean, I wouldn’t send my child to a Catholic school, any more than I baptised or confirmed him, but if I was ok with signing him up to a school associated with profoundly corrupt institution, I’d expect he’d be doing prayers and Mass at school.

My Catholic primary school had prayers 4 times a day mass weekly (sometimes twice if it was a holy day. Arts making palm crosses etc. go to a different school. FWIW I’m not Catholic.

I am a fully committed (multiple times a week) church going Catholic. Went to Catholic primary, secondary and college. This is very normal.

In my school we had morning prayers, the angelus at noon with the Salve Regina, prayer before lunch, prayer after lunch and leaving prayer. We had regular exposition and benediction as well as special Masses such as Ash Wednesday and Holy days of obligation.

There was also prayers before school in the chapel. There was Mass every week for a particular tutor group and anyone who wanted to join. This was also open to the public. We then had a half termly Mass for the whole year.

I currently work in a non Catholic school and miss the Catholic ethos.

We had some parents complaining about the religious side of the school when they knew what they were getting into. I remember one parent removed their child cause they didn't want them doing anything religious...then why send them to a religious school.

If you do not want them to take part in the whole Catholic school experience which does include prayers, silence, Mass, charity and everything else that goes with it, please do not send them. It may keep out a family that does actually believe and would thrive in that environment.

I think a Catholic education stands you in really good stead (a non Catholic here who went to a catholic convent primary school and and secondary school)

The C of E my youngest attended had a weekly service.
It was nice.
Choose a different school if you're not keen.

The problem is that she doesn’t want them to practice Catholicism during school hours.

I understand that, but it has a good reputation so going to mass isn't affecting performance.

But I agree with others, if you don't like it then go to another school with the same reputation without having to go to mass.

ETA to add quote my first comment was referring to.